-- from your post, I believe you've never known/experienced a relationship with a narcissist where what you perceive as providing for and protecting his family was really all about protecting AM's image of himself. His wife and family were merely an extension of his public persona and easily replaceable. For a narc, the 2nd child is typically collateral. The tears were all for AM.
IMO, AM possesses traits of a narc/sociopath and while all of us saw a horrific tragedy, AM felt terribly inconvenienced. As he told MM's sister MP, the killer thought about this for a long time. AM long ago convinced himself the victims made him do it.
I also suggest listening to his jailhouse calls. MOO
People with a narcissistic personality disorder are “criminals” even if they do not ever get arrested. Their “sense of entitlement,” “unreasonable expectations” and “lack of sensitivity to the rules of others” result in injury to others. They manipulate and exploit people in their unceasing efforts to build themselves up. Their “contemptuous” and “impatient” behavior has a negative impact on others. The people who suffer the most are those closest to them. Spouses, children, and work colleagues are ground down daily. In order to peacefully coexist, they must try to satisfy the narcissist's insatiable psychological needs. A person who does not meet the expectations of the narcissist likely will have a very unpleasant encounter. Anyone may become a victim — a waiter, a sales lady, a receptionist — and bear the brunt of his disdain, condescension, and contempt.
The narcissist is a victimizer.