Spanking illegal?

Discussion in 'Up to the Minute' started by californiacarrie, Jan 19, 2007.

  1. californiacarrie

    californiacarrie New Member

    Messages:
    397
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
  2. Loading...


  3. Kymistry35

    Kymistry35 It's never to late to be who you could have been

    Messages:
    3,640
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I thought abuse was already illegal?
     
  4. PaperDoll

    PaperDoll When I'm Silent, I make the most sense

    Messages:
    25,775
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    36
    Spare the rod, spoil the child comes to mind here.. hum... not sure what to think and I don't have kids... I just had to come here and give my opinion.. hehe :D
     
  5. californiacarrie

    californiacarrie New Member

    Messages:
    397
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    There is a very fine line as to what is considered abuse and what is "corporal punishment." Spanking is not abuse unless it is "excessive" (ie: leaves marks, and other criteria). As for whaking, kicking and the likes, I assume they may fall under the same catergory currently (if it doesnt leave a mark, its not illegal). Corporal punishment is highly discouraged by child protective agencies but its not something that a parent can get in trouble for right now unless it is deemed "excessive" like I said before.
     
  6. White Rain

    White Rain New Member

    Messages:
    4,829
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I have to admit that I give my kids a swat on the behind if I think they need it. I don't come anywhere close to leaving marks though, and never would.
     
  7. Pandora

    Pandora New Member

    Messages:
    1,951
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I don't have kids, but if I had one like me, I would spank. I was an extremely strong-willed child. Spanking worked like nothing else--literally.

    When I was, oh, nine or so, my parents got the brilliant idea to ground me from reading--that was sheer TORTURE! They would have done it earlier (I was reading around 3), but they didn't want to stifle my learning. By the time I was nine, I was reading on a high school level, so they figured losing a week or two of reading privileges now and then wouldn't hurt my education--just my sanity!

    The spanking hurt more because it was embarassing than anything painful. Only once do I remember being spanked out of frustration. My mom grabbed the first thing she could to nail me--a flip flop! Boy, that really hurt (sarcasm)--it wasn't embarassing, just funny!
     
  8. southcitymom

    southcitymom New Member

    Messages:
    16,021
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    A good shepherd uses a rod to direct the sheep along the right path so that they remain safe. A good shepherd never hits the sheep with the rod.

    Likely, this statement from the old testament was not talking about physical punishment of children, but rather about being a trustworthy, observant shepherd and directing children's paths so that they remain safe.
     
  9. CyberLaw

    CyberLaw Former Member

    Messages:
    2,681
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Time outs and taking away priviledges is from my experience MUCH more effective in "teaching a child" that their behavoir is not acceptable.

    Not spoiling the child, setting boudaries, following through with what you have said, natural consequences, are a life long learning basis for children. Holding them accountable and responsible for their actions, honesty, you know the things that will form a ethical human being.

    Not showing the child that "violence" is the answer, what lesson does that teach kids. That violence is acceptable, that Mom and Dad are bigger, stronger, in control, have power over them and can "physically" hurt them.

    About leaving marks, too many parents abuse kids and use the excuse " I was just disipling him, and blame the child. Too many parents "lose control", too many parents uyse physical force.

    A "deeply" religious family "read the Bible literally, and "physically" harmed their kids, you know "the rod", buised the kids, left marks, CAS was involved, kids removed, and the parents "cried" relligious prosecution, they were raising their kids "accoding" to God. They were "hurt" that bad, but had to be taught a lesson. Kids were returned, but they were given parenting lessons, and "well supervised".

    So now I do not agree with any physical punishment for children under any circumstances. Violence is not the answer...........
     
  10. Peter Hamilton

    Peter Hamilton New Member

    Messages:
    3,374
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
     
  11. Becba

    Becba Former Member

    Messages:
    1,384
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
     
  12. txsvicki

    txsvicki New Member

    Messages:
    14,189
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0

    I agree that a shepard wouldn't hit his sheep or be used as a Biblical example but on the other hand God instructed the Israelites to stone their grown kids who were getting into trouble, such as becoming drunkards. I can't believe that kicking a child is still only a misdemeanor.
     
  13. RUNDAWAY

    RUNDAWAY New Member

    Messages:
    36
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I truly believe that, if I wasn't spanked when I was a kid, I'd be in some sort of trouble all these years later and would not have the good life that I have now.

    I absolutely do NOT feel that I was abused by being spanked and, it is MY butt.
     
  14. IrishMist

    IrishMist You can't control the wind - but you can adjust yo

    Messages:
    7,469
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I think this is one of those things that sound good on paper, but doesn't apply well to real life.

    When my girls were young, I tried that touchy-feely thing. Time-outs, talking to them to explain what they did, etc. I couldn't take them anywhere. A couple of well timed swats on the bottom, and what do ya know? A big change in behavior!

    This nanny state business is getting way out of hand, IMO.
     
  15. southcitymom

    southcitymom New Member

    Messages:
    16,021
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I personally am not opposed to a swat on the bottom, and I definitely don't follow a great deal of what the Bible says when it comes to child-rearing! I just think the "spare the rod, spoil the child" quote is often misconstrued to the detriment of children.
     
  16. SadieMae

    SadieMae Former Member

    Messages:
    4,437
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Until mine were about 6 years old, nothing got their attention other than a quick swat to their butts. At 1-4 I don't think they comprehended "time out" concept because it never worked for me. They knew they were messing up when I spanked them. Repeating "no", "stop" or "don't do that" was pretty much ignored by them. After the 1st warning, they got a butt smack if their behavior continued. They got the message. I rarely if at all had to spank after 6 years old. Then, time outs and taking away priveleges worked to discipline them.
     
  17. angelmom

    angelmom The love stays...forever in our hearts

    Messages:
    7,376
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I think every kid is different, and different punishments work in different ways. I have one who will tremble at a raised voice and one who really couldn't be punished effectively until he was old enough for the guilt trip. Time out, spanking, grounding...he is unfazed.

    The interesting thing to me is the age limit. I haven't ever really had a reason to spank a child older than 4. To me, a swat on the butt (actually on the diaper) for a toddler was an effective way to reinforce a sharp "NO!" when they did something dangerous. The noise of the diaper being smacked and the tone of voice got the message across, and I don't believe they were actually hurt. Once they are 4, you can at least reason with them a bit.

    I guess my grandma would be in big trouble. She used to use a wooden spoon or the back of a hairbrush!
     
  18. reb

    reb New Member

    Messages:
    2,968
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    the problem is how to regulate HOW the adult does it. most american middle & upper class kids today are spoiled little brats could use a good beating. (and their parents too!!!) but of course we have gone from one extreme (the unchecked abuse of generations past) to another (lay a hand on your kid and go to jail).
    i used to think spanking should be made illegal- period,, because so many parents do it wrong, not as a form of discipline but using their kid as a punching bag. plus it teaches the kid that hitting someone is an acceptable way to get your anger out. but now, after i've seen a generation or 2 of kids and what monsters they have become, i see what happens when you put SO much importance on children that they think they are little kings and queens. children need to learn that they are not the center of the universe, and learn a sense of HUMILITY... and better to learn it from their parents at a young age than from the cold, harsh world when they get older. so, keep spanking (if your kid really needs it)... but just continue to regulate it. if it leaves a mark, it is probably abuse. schoolteachers should be well-versed in recognizing signs- and i imagine they already are.
     
  19. Mabel

    Mabel Former Member

    Messages:
    9,620
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I must live on an entirely different planet because I don't see monster kids everywhere. My daughter and the kids she goes to school with are polite, intelligent, and caring young adults. They have jobs, they do volunteer work, they get good grades, they obey rules, and they stay out of trouble. My sons are both hard working responsible young men who support themselves and are the first to jump in and offer help to anyone who needs it. Their girlfriends both have jobs and attend college in the evenings.

    Where is this place where so many bad kids live? I'd like to know so that I never make the mistake of moving there.
     
  20. southcitymom

    southcitymom New Member

    Messages:
    16,021
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I live on the same planet you do, Mabel. ;)
     
  21. IrishMist

    IrishMist You can't control the wind - but you can adjust yo

    Messages:
    7,469
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Maybe older kids, but I'll tell ya, there are alot of younger kids that I think could use a swat on the butt.

    Go out to dinner, and there's kids being brats. Same with malls, movies, and grocery stores. I rarely go to family restaurants any more for this very reason.

    I wish more people would realize that most kids want limits. It makes them feel cared about and safe.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice