Sweden - Gay Marriage Now Legal In.....

Discussion in 'Up to the Minute' started by southcitymom, Apr 1, 2009.

  1. Nova

    Nova Well-Known Member

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    I wouldn't bet on it. They estimate there are well over 1,000 benefits to civil marriage.

    More importantly, "marriage" (of two people) is so ingrained as a concept in Western culture, I suspect it would take decades if not centuries to wean everyone from the habit.

    Speaking of children, however, one benefit of same-sex marriage is that I now have a legal relationship with my stepchildren. There are numerous advantages to that in addition to hospital visitation rights and presumed rights of inheritance absent a will. (My stepchildren are my heirs. Should my father, whom I have seen twice in 40 years, be able to show up and confiscate my estate on the ground that he is my "real" relative? Such things have happened in probate courts with homophobic judges, despite wills to the contrary.)

    (BTW, I was married in 2008, not 2006. I'm really not that sentimental about dates and anniversaries; fortunately, my husband has accepted I am who I am.)

    If anything, the fight for marriage equality should remind us that civil marriage DOES still matter, even if its course does not always run smoothly.
     


  2. bwt42

    bwt42 Former Member

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    I guess I didn't explain myself very well. My point was that as the percentage of married people declines the unmarried will be less likely to want to give the 1000 benefits to the married. Imho we are in a period of rapid change & I don't share your view about the future of marriage. Wish I could.
     
  3. Nova

    Nova Well-Known Member

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    I'm not sure marriage rates are declining so drastically. Yes, there has been a small decline since 2006, but since the studies I can find include everybody 15 and older, then factors such as longevity and delayed marriages may result in lower figures, even if roughly the same percentage of people are getting married.

    Obviously, fewer people marry now than in the 1950s, a time when remaining unmarried was seen as highly suspect.

    But my area of training is cultural studies and, in that arena, marriage is still seen as the ultimate goal in almost all romantic narratives. This doesn't mean everyone ties the knot, obviously, but it's a strong indicator and encouragement.

    BTW, those 1000+ "benefits" of civil marriage do not mostly come at the expense of unmarried people. (As I pointed out above, at the moment I'm paying higher taxes than I would if I were single.) Many, maybe most, of those "benefits" are simply a matter of legal and social clarity.

    And let's remember there are responsibilities that come with the "benefits": I am now legally responsible for my husband's debts and vice versa.
     
  4. Flutterby80

    Flutterby80 Active Member

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  5. i.b.nora

    i.b.nora I am polka dot

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  6. Gardenlady

    Gardenlady Active Member

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  7. gitana1

    gitana1 Verified Attorney

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  8. Brightbird

    Brightbird Active Member

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    And yet we still don't have gay marriage in Australia. In 2004, our government actually changed the Marriage Act to specify that it has to be between a man and a woman. Last year, the Australian Capital Territory made gay marriage possible, and then the High Court overturned it after the federal government appealed against it. I support gay marriage 100%. I don't see myself ever getting married. It's not meaningful to me and my parents never married. But at least I have that choice. Sometimes, Australia is really backwards and it's embarrassing.
     
  9. i.b.nora

    i.b.nora I am polka dot

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    Idaho's Gay Marriage Ban Struck Down By Federal Judge
    The Huffington Post | by Mollie Reilly
    Posted: 05/13/2014 8:02 pm EDT Updated: 3 minutes ago


    "A federal judge has ruled that Idaho's ban on same-sex marriage is unconstitutional.

    The ruling, handed down by U.S. Magistrate Judge Candy Dale on Tuesday, followed oral arguments on May 5.

    Earlier Tuesday, Idaho Gov. Butch Otter (R) filed a preemptive motion asking for an immediate stay if Dale did rule against the gay marriage ban.

    “In the event of an adverse order, Gov. Otter will timely and duly appeal it to the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals,” the governor’s motion reads, according to the Spokesman Review."

    More...

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/13/idaho-gay-marriage_n_5319661.html
     
  10. gitana1

    gitana1 Verified Attorney

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    There were never any questions about whether marriage should confer civil benefits until gay people began to be able to be married. Now suddenly...the civil benefits and the civil institution itself, is suspect.

    IMO that argument is merely a thin veneer, for most, hiding a disgust and hatred of gay people and a desire to deny them equality.
     
  11. Nova

    Nova Well-Known Member

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    gitana, my virtual friend, I think you are right in many, probably most cases. But I assume you didn't mean to pass judgment on the poster who raised the issue here; we don't know him/her well enough.

    And I have heard gay and gay-friendly celebrities (Mario Cantone, Kathy Griffin) say they originally opposed marriage equality simply because they thought marriage was an obsolete institution. (I know Griffin has since come around and now lobbies for equality. I don't know Cantone's current position.)

    As I said above, I might have agreed with them once upon a time. But I have since had ample time and experience to rethink the matter. I agree with the federal courts that legal marriages are a benefit to society, be they gay or straight.
     
  12. i.b.nora

    i.b.nora I am polka dot

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    Oregon today.
     
  13. Nova

    Nova Well-Known Member

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    Hallelujah!

    It was embarrassing for awhile there when the West Coast, the "land of fruits and nuts", was behind the curve on this issue.

    Proud Left Coaster here.
     
  14. Kat

    Kat Kind words do not cost much

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  15. Gardenlady

    Gardenlady Active Member

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    19! Almost halfway (finally!)


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
  16. Kat

    Kat Kind words do not cost much

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  17. animlzrule

    animlzrule Well-Known Member

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    Finally, some good news out of my state, a state which has become an embarrassment on the national stage over the past couple of years:

    MADISON, Wis. -
    A federal court has overturned a state ban on same sex marriage and the Dane County Clerk plans to stay open late to issue licenses.

    LINK:

    http://www.channel3000.com/news/court-overturns-samesex-marriage-ban/26370048

    Of course, our Attorney General is vowing to appeal.......
     
  18. Nova

    Nova Well-Known Member

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    Of course. But good for the Badger State, anyway! My husband is a Beloit and UW-Madison grad and has been very embarrassed of late. LOL.
     
  19. Karmady

    Karmady Former Member

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    Why do the clerks' offices stay open late when a court decision comes down. I see that over and over in the gay marriage context and nowhere else, ever. In the stone ages, I spent many an afternoon on a subway to file something in person at a courthouse before they closed for filing at 4:30 or 5:00 - no exceptions. Actually, they were gleeful to close the door in your face. Not to mention, I've yet to meet a court/gov't employee who is willing to stay past "closing time" and, if they do, there's much time and a half or double time to be paid. wtf?
     
  20. michmi

    michmi Well-Known Member

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    Thank you! I had a huge problem with my county clerk's office actually opening up on a Saturday for this purpose. God knows I've never received any special treatment for any business I need to take care of up there, and as a taxpayer, I don't understand how you can open what is supposed to be a public office only for one small segment of the population (and same sex marriage was the ONLY business being taken care of that day). And it was all a waste of time, as the ban was reinstated on Monday.
     

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