Still Missing VA - Bethany Decker, 21, Ashburn, 29 Jan 2011

Discussion in 'Currently Awaiting Trial' started by Truthful Lies, Mar 1, 2011.

  1. hollye

    hollye Well-Known Member

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    Good points, cmlegend99! I wonder though, was she more of a college student than a military wife or vice versa? I definitely realize that there is generally a relationship between military wives, especially when husbands are deployed, but was she a part of this circle? Or was she more involved and active with her college life than being a wife to a deployed husband? Or even a mother for that matter? Where did her priorities lie?
     


  2. Lunar1121

    Lunar1121 Active Member

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    cmledgend - yay for Navy ... I was a Navy brat and am now and Air Force spouse. ;) I agree with you in that some spouses have a distant relationship with their family. Not sure if it's because of the military life or it was just their life before that anways.
    As far as friends in the area ... if I recall correctly an article stated that it was a friend who last saw her on 1/29 she does have some people apparently. Her husband being NG I am not sure what their military support system is like?! If no one has heard from me and they knew my husband was gone, our unit, be it spouses or the memebers themselves, would be digging deep and fast to see if I was ok. In fact when he is gone I get a call at least once a week, more if I don't answer that initial call. This all depends of course! Just adding to your great post. :)
     
  3. MorenoI

    MorenoI Active Member

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    Hmm very strange indeed that comment left by "Anonymous". But then again you know all these people who have nothing better than to make up stories and hinder cases. Whatever the case is she deserves to be found safe!
     
  4. peeples

    peeples New Member

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    And they didn't take the toddler???
    This is just soo weird!!!!

    Now If i had a chance to take a Hawaii vacation no way I'd take my kids, I need some mommy time HOWEVER My children live with me I'm with them every waking hour they aren't in school. This chick seems to have not had a lot of contact with her child...
    Something is just sooo off with the entire situation
     
  5. CMac2

    CMac2 Well-Known Member

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    Seems like we're getting all kinds of conflicting information.

    *I read that Bethany is estranged from her family

    vs.

    *I read she was always in contact by phone/text with either her mother or her siblings

    *I read that Bethany and her husband were estranged, and that the apartment she lived in was one she shared with another man- a boyfriend

    vs.

    *I read that Bethany and her husband recently went on vacation to Hawaii

    *I read that Bethany would never leave her 17 mo. old baby boy

    vs.

    *The last time her family (who is caring for her son) saw her was Christmas Eve, though she didn't go off the grid until January 29th- leaving more than a month's worth of voluntary no contact with her son.

    It just seems that for every statement of "fact" that we receive, we get another statement of "fact" that is claiming the exact opposite! :banghead:
     
  6. Soulmagent

    Soulmagent Well-Known Member

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    I Heard about Her on the news this morning but why is brown circle mapped?
     
  7. belimom

    belimom Speak the truth even if your voice shakes~M.Kuhn

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    I think her family is in Fredericksburg? I think they have the toddler...
     
  8. Soulmagent

    Soulmagent Well-Known Member

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    Thanks.

    Local fredericksburg media links. Nothing there.

    http://fredericksburg.com/flshome/

    http://www.wfls.com/news/

    Off topic, I just left Stafford and I see there was a deadly shooting lised on the wfls link. That happened to me when the snipers were arround too. Staying home now.
     
  9. peeples

    peeples New Member

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    Maybe there is conflict over her being pregnant again.. after all she wasn't caring for her toddler her family was.. maybe they were putting their foot down and stating they weren't going to care for yet a second child....
    Or didn't it say she was a senior... maybe she wanted to start making plans to have the toddler live with her (although I doubt this due to the little contact she reportedly had with him/her)
     
  10. Soulmagent

    Soulmagent Well-Known Member

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    The message on this page titled important information is strange.

    Was it different earlier?
     
  11. hollye

    hollye Well-Known Member

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  12. hollye

    hollye Well-Known Member

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    Classes at GMU began Jan 24th. Did Bethany attend any of her classes and when was the last time she was seen in class, if she did?
     
  13. hollye

    hollye Well-Known Member

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    No, I don't believe so. It appears to be the same as it did when the created the page.

    I don't really find the message strange so much so as the people who started it seem to know that historically FB pages can causes problems for an investigation if people begin posting information on them, instead of going to LE with their information.

    ETA ~ It may have been created in conjunction with the Loudoun County Sheriff's Office, as they have a link to the page on their FB page... http://www.facebook.com/#!/loudounsheriff
     
  14. revampz

    revampz Active Member

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    http://fredericksburg.com/News/FLS/2011/032011/03022011/1299114814fls

    The above article says that they werent living together and that her family went to see him off at the airport but she did not show up.

    They also went to Hawaii to visit her father.

    It also says that she didnt have bags packed etc.....but that comment by anonymous we all read said there was nothing in the apartment but a packed bag!!

    I also think the reason mum might have the 17mth old is because these two are separated, she has a new bf and the dad is overseas...
     
  15. Truthful Lies

    Truthful Lies Well-Known Member

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    Wow! Made it to the "front page" of the Huffington Post (including iPhone app, which is excellent).

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/03/02/bethany-anne-decker-missing-since-january_n_830588.html

    Okay, so these articles answer some questions. The child is theirs together, we know that much. Investigators are trying to arrange an internet "face-to-face" with DH.

    Also said that Mom didn't report her missing because she figured she was busy with waitressing and school? Did Mom know school didn't start until the end of Jan.? Was it unusual for Bethany to go that long without calling to ask how her son is doing? I would prob. call several times a day, but that's just me.

    I just have a hard time believing that no one raised the alarm for a woman who is 5 months pregnant...that's what gets me =P I can see why they may not take a 17 month old to Hawaii, but if visiting her father, wouldn't he want to see his grandson? If it were just a vacation, I understand.

    So, the waitressing also opens up a host of other POIs, though...people she interacted with at work, or someone who had a thing for her (just adding in addition to other maybe known associates).

    (PS - Thanks for keeping this thread rolling, guys!)
     
  16. Truthful Lies

    Truthful Lies Well-Known Member

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    I think this is really important, hollye. I wouldn't have missed my first week of classes my senior semester (if it was). Even if it were drop/add period...but then again, we don't know if she was super serious/strict about schoolwork, etc. There has to be some professor (hopefully) that can tell LE her habits in regard to that. Whether she was registered for classes and had paid will be a telling discovery. Also, who was funding her life? If her and DH separated and just waitressing part time...? School loans? Grants? Continued support from DH? Just wondering.

    Also, wondering how long Bethany's Mom has had the 17 month old.
     
  17. hollye

    hollye Well-Known Member

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    Well, it looks like for whatever reason, the FB page that was started for Bethany has been shut down. The creator states the following...

    However, I have a feeling that it was not LE who suggested this but random people. Which is sad because I do feel that FB can be a very useful resource when getting the word out about a missing person.
     
  18. hollye

    hollye Well-Known Member

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    BBM

    I would be interested to know what her father has to say about how Bethany and Emile interacted while in Hawaii and whether or not there was any indication of problems.
     
  19. belimom

    belimom Speak the truth even if your voice shakes~M.Kuhn

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    So glad to see this is getting more coverage - now on CNN:

    Authorities search for missing, pregnant mom

    http://www.cnn.com/2011/CRIME/03/03/virginia.missing.mom/index.html?hpt=T2

    bbm

    Sounds to me like either she went back over to this apartment and had a run-in there with someone (I hate to quote the 'rumor' so I'm leaving it at this)... OR... it was set up to look like she did. MOO
     
  20. belimom

    belimom Speak the truth even if your voice shakes~M.Kuhn

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    Also from the CNN article (bbm) (ETA: I also see that this is quoted above in a previous article):

    So did anyone ask where she was? Did they not speak to her ahead of time and say, 'We're going to be there - are you?' And after this trip to Hawaii and staying with her grandparents, then why would she not see him off at the airport?

    So many questions... Where is she?!?
     

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