WA WA - Sky Metalwala, 2, Bellevue, 6 Nov 2011 - # 6

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Hope32

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For me it is challenging to tell if someone is bi-polar when they are taking their meds correctly ..they act normal..but when they stop their meds...Katie bar the door.

I have had a couple of friends that are bi-polar stop their meds and what a mess.

AGREED! Don't know what your are going to get
 

stunned again

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Did not the ball cover up something also? In the picture with the sun covering up Dads (?) face?
 

Janeumayer

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You didn't mention the door. The door leading to outside without any kind of lock that the kids would not be able to open. The door that is in the same room that the kids apparently slept in. See why I have some problems with the severe OCD thing?

Then the stacked things up against the wall. That stack is not stable enough that if one of the kids pulled on one of them it would stay up. I have seen so many photos of the kids sitting on top of counter tops and other furniture that it makes me worry about when they were left alone.

MOO

Question, do we know when they moved into this apartment? It looks like they had just moved in. MOO
 

HRCODEPINK

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Is it possible mom had a friend on the inside. Like a friend or a friend of a friend who worked for CPS or family court? Just a thought after reading dads declaration and if his evidence showed what he was saying why would he not have atleast supervised visitation? Or why not put the kids in foster care until some of the accusations were figured out as fact or not?

I think that they both told the court a bunch of pretty serious stuff and when the court looked and were told that yes, mom has issues, but she can still effectively parent, they choose mom's side above dad's. Despite states saying that moms are not weighed heavier in making these decisions there are some people/judges who do give mom more weigh. Add in his Middle Eastern dissent and you have more problems.

People like this make me sick. It puts women like me in a terrible position because when the fears are real you still look like you are just exaggerating the situation. I fear that things like this will make it so that people like me will feel pressured to exaggerate so that they will, in the judges minds, downgrade it to just the truth.
 

GingerRed

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I'm going to defend the dad's attorney here and the dad, sort of separate them out from the group (although I get and agree with your sentiment). From what I have seen from the docket and from what I have heard from the lawyer and the dad and other news reports, they did everything they possibly could. Had dad take polygraphs, undergo child custody investigations/evaluations, file for divorce when she started acting crazy and when she then demanded custody, filing declarations, demanding a review of her medical records (which were then placed on file) cooperating with a CPS investigation or two or three, etc. etc.

Sadly, sometimes the system does not listen. And when they make a decision, which could be influenced by subjective perception, prejudice, etc., they get very defensive and more entrenched when that decision is questioned.

Just look at this thread. Here we have:

1. A mom whose child went missing in her custody, dad hadn't seen the child in 10 months.
2. Mom admits to having left the child alone, sick, on the side of the highway, taking only one child with her.
3. Mom claims the car ran out of gas but it had plenty of gas and there was no gas can at the car.
4. Mom claims she was whisking her sick baby to the hospital but she passed closer ones and did not bother to take a cell phone.
5. Mom kept the children from dad by making ever increasing allegations of domestic violence and child abuse against him, including, eventually, even sexual abuse of the little daughter.
6. Said mom then requests that her daughter be placed in the custody of the abusive father, not in foster care.
7. Said mom also agreed to every other weekend visitation just before Sky was reported missing.
8. Dad claims that he had to file for divorce after his very ill wife had to be hospitalized, stated she had thoughts of strangling their son and could not care for the kids, but then demanded that they be in her care.
9. Dad begged the court to listen, stating he feared something bad would happen to the kids unless the court intervened.
11. In the meantime, mom taped herself alienating her child during custody exchanges, whipping her daughter into a frenzy of hysterics. She published that for all the world to hear.
12. The court finally did intervene. After reviewing all the evidence, it apparently was determined that yes, mother had a severe mental illness, but she could effectively parent. Dad had a restraining order issued against him. Justice, according to the mother, was served and she was awarded primary custody. And now Sky is missing.
13. Since Sky went missing, the father has cooperated fully, sitting for two polygraphs. He has spoken to the media, choking back tears, talking about his little "dude" and trying, heartbreakingly, to stay positive and believe his little boy is coming home. We haven't seen mom at all, she refuses to be polygraphed and she won't come in to speak with LE face to face.

Yet despite all this, there continue to be accusations that dad was a liar about mom's mental condition, that dad abused her into mental illness, that mom is so afraid of him that she hid the child, that dad was stalking her and took the child from the car, that dad has a powerful network of Pakistani family and friends that likely forced mom to agree to the new custody arrangement, that dad's attorney fabricated his declarations, or spun them to make mom look bad, that something is "off" about dad, he seems giddy and too happy as he desperately holds out hope and begs for help from the public, etc., etc., and that if something happened to Sky, it was anything but outright, intentional murder or child abuse leading to death. Given that, is it no wonder Sky's dad and his attorney could get nowhere?

I think dad did all he could to save his kids, with the help of his attorney. I have seen this before - when the court system fails to believe and/or ultimately decides one side is more believable, and the other parent simply runs out of options, runs out of money to litigate and is left with a child or children who are so alienated that it is now traumatic to enforce visitation, they have no choice but to sit back and hope for the best, hope for a change, hope for the truth to come out.

I am afraid the truth has now come out. I wish it was different. That sweet little boy with his vulnerable, little smile just wanted to be cared for and hugged and loved and wanted. My heart breaks for him and everyone who tried to protect him.

^
This.

Every word.:rocker:
 

gitana1

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I'm not sure what the outcome was I can't find info on that.

I don't believe this was when the protection order's were done because of this article:

The couple separated in March 2010, court records show. In June 2010, the same month Metalwala filed for divorce, Biryukova, 30, filed for a protection order on behalf of herself and their two children

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/11/07/sky-metalwala-missing-was_n_1080847.html

The court docket shows a few, separate protective orders. I'm not sure when the last one was or the result. Sometimes they result in a mutual stay away order which is not as serious or life altering as a domestic violence restraining order (which goes one a person's record and bars them from teaching, being a cop, firefighter, government clearance work, etc. .

Is it possible mom had a friend on the inside. Like a friend or a friend of a friend who worked for CPS or family court? Just a thought after reading dads declaration and if his evidence showed what he was saying why would he not have atleast supervised visitation? Or why not put the kids in foster care until some of the accusations were figured out as fact or not?

The court docket and news reports make it clear that the whole issue was intensively investigated. It looks like CPS was involved (and cleared dad, ultimately) but that the court child custody evaluators sided with mom and believed that although she has a "severe" mental illness, their words, she can effectively parent. I think mom alienated the girl well enough that they felt they couldn't place the kids in dad's care and either he or the court decided that visitation was too traumatic at the moment.

Maybe he ran out of money for awhile and couldn't litigate again so early. Maybe he just decided to step back from visits because it was so traumatic with M. Maybe the court suspended visits temporarily.

All I know is someone screwed up royally.
 

SmoothOperator

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I have just read Solomon's declaration.. I cannot put into words the even physical reaction that I felt reading the 23 page court document.. I at three separate points in the document had to physically remove myself from reading it.. I became so very overwhelmed with emotion and still am pained with extreme deep sorrow and even anger at this man's honest to the very core begging for his children's safety.. There is no anger, there is no hate, there is not a single drop of mud slung by this man.. I truly don't believe my heart has ever hurt so very badly as it is for this man right now.. He loved Julia thru it all, he loved her and he would have stayed if he felt his babies were safe. He had such compassion for this sick woman.. All He wanted was to protect his babies that is it!! He told the courts what would happen and it's exactly what happened! MM has been so very severely abused by Julia, in ways that will take her entire lifetime to heal from.. Deep and severe so much so I feel many may not be able to even comprehend. But unlike Sky ATLEAST MM will have a chance at a lifetime to heal the deep wounds inflicted by a very very sick human being that never saw MM as anything but a tool to use for her wants and desires.. That child, nor Sky was ever even human to Julia.. The issues are so deep and complex God bless Solomon Metalwala he is a saint, period.. IMO drop the bashing over the Target issue this man has been severely manipulated and used and part of him has died along the way, especially now with Sky gone.. He has suffered enough and I for one will not add an ounce more of anger or judgement this man's way.. He deserves our compassion.

There is so very much more that my heart and my mind are just literally flooded with at this moment as I still am continuing to shed tears for Sky, MM, and Solomon.. But I'll end with this for now!! For whatever reasons s. Owens has been manipulated and bought intO julias bs.. I believe 100% that when Julia called SO that morning she full well assumed that SO would help her in every way possible to pull off this faked abduction.. She full well believed SO would continue the charade and lie for her like she did thru this custody issue!! I believe SO is filled with a helluva allot of pain and sorrow for her very real part in this nightmare!! I imagine she's crying these exact same tears that I am for Solomon now!! I believe she now sees Solomon only wanted his children to be safe!! All too little too late for SKY.. But I know her heart is heavy with sorrow so at this time I have no need to add to her already tremendous pain and remorse.. I do thank God that she stuck it to Julia that Sunday morning and immediately called 911.. I can guarantee you Julia was absolutely blindsided with that..

The declaration must be read by all.. It's extremely difficult and evokes great sorrow and emotion but IMO it must be read to really see what this family has endured.. I am so very hurt.. Hurting for Sky, MM,, and Solomon and from that pain erupts tremendous anger and vehement hatred for Julia.. To an extreme..

**ETA SORRY FOR ALL THE TYPOS AND JUMBLED WORDS AND THOUGHTS.. extremely emotional still from realizing what terror this family has been thru.. All 3, Mm, Sky, and very much Solomon who all along was the only intended target with the two children never even humanized in Julia's mind.. They were NOTHING BUT USED AS A MEANS TO AN END.. to end and destroy Solomon.. IMO this woman has zero remorse and tho I definitely believe her to Be mentally Ill that in no way excuses what I feel trumps it all in pure, unadulterated evil.. This woman feels nothing for NO ONE BUT HERSELF! shades of Casey Anthony but a Casey Anthony left to deteriorate a few years down the road after having married with a couple kids.. Very same core to each of these women.. Selfish, self-centered, and zero feeling for their own flesh and blood children that they carried in their womb and birthed into this world.. Zero connection whatsoever and only saw the children as tools used for self gain, gratification, etc.. This is a breed of mothers that we must now realize is alive and well and IMO are as dangerous as the Jeffrey Dahmer's of our world!!! Their precious children do not stand a chance.. How can they when their very own mothers are the one's that inflict the severe, deep wounds of abuse and have zero empathy for their children and do not bat an eyelash at snuffing that Childs life out!! They will carry on as if nothing ever happened!! It's chilling and it's very very real!
 

Janeumayer

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My floorplan guess: http://www.liveatveloce.com/p/district_city_apartment_floorplans/floor_plans/redmond-wa-98052/veloce-3441

ETA: It won't link correctly, but the open one bedroom floor plan

one-bed-one-bath-729.png

Its not that one. WHen M is eating at the counter, you can clearly see a hallway? to the right of her. Ill try and check other ones.
 

cc81

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But not upset enough to the point that she was able to go online to her flickr account and place a sun on dads face in that photo of her, dad and M. I know that photo was NOT in there the past couple of days when I first saw the photos in her account. That was done recently.

I came onto this board on either Monday or Tuesday and that picture was there with the face blocked.
 

GingerRed

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The court docket shows a few, separate protective orders. I'm not sure when the last one was or the result. Sometimes they result in a mutual stay away order which is not as serious or life altering as a domestic violence restraining order (which goes one a person's record and bars them from teaching, being a cop, firefighter, government clearance work, etc. .

In King County and as far as I know, all of WA state, restraining orders are issued upon filing of divorce as SOP. As hearings go on and changes are made, those will show up just like they do in their docket.

Maybe he ran out of money for awhile and couldn't litigate again so early. Maybe he just decided to step back from visits because it was so traumatic with M. Maybe the court suspended visits temporarily.

All I know is someone screwed up royally.

Due to volume, divorce and parenting plan cases are taking FOREVER in Western WA. For instance, I filed in June. Next week, mid November, mind you, there is an administrative hearing to merely set the schedule for the divorce and final parenting plan. It's expected to go on for at least 12 months after that. I've only recently sorted out the initial temporary orders. Even on a temporary restraining order you're supposed to get a hearing in 2 weeks, and those are being extended out to six weeks and beyond.

In a case where a family is waiting on ordered mediation or arbitration, the delays are much longer. So it might not have been a financial thing--the delay could have purely been a result of the local court schedule issues we are all experiencing.
 

bendrn

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What strikes me in those photos? The toys are sort of laying around staged in one pic. Most of the time especially with a four year old, they are grouped.

The four year old is in one of those highchairs ATTACHED TO A BAR HEIGHT COUNTER and in the background there are stacks of totes taller than me.

There is a floor lamp sitting right next to a toy box. C'mon. All the electrical outlets are uncovered.

Have I mentioned I am a bit OCD about child safety? Everything about her space makes me nervous.
Neat observation about the toys. Since you mention it, I can't help but notice that all I can see are "girl" toys. Where are the tonka trucks and nerf balls, etc., that little boys love to play with?
 

Janeumayer

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Its not that one. WHen M is eating at the counter, you can clearly see a hallway? to the right of her. Ill try and check other ones.

Call me crazy, I cannot find a floorplan that matches the pic of M at the kitchen.
 

Rougelatete

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http://images.bimedia.net/documents/Decl+of+Solomon+Metalwala.pdf

I'm half way thru and in utter complete shock. I had no idea OCD could be so bad. I am so sorry for those that suffer through it. Soloman in NO WAY could make this up. He must have been so conflicted as to how to deal with her and the children. I imagine he had regressed fear of deportation as well. I would bet that never goes away based on the circumstances of their marriage.
For her to have gained custody is just a travesty and clearly a hole in the Justice system of that County and Jurisdiction.
IMO she clearly "cleansed herself of her marriage and S.." who reminded her so much of Solomon.
I think LE is being cautious because of her instability and thank goodness M will never be in her care again.

Just to clarify -- if the reports of JB's OCD-related behaviors are true, she has an EXTREME case. OCD is all on a spectrum, and the people I do therapy with who have OCD do not have behaviors this extreme. If what is being said is accurate, then I'm really shocked that CPS allowed her to retain custody of the children. When any psychiatric disorder interferes at this level with your ability to care for your childrens' basic needs, CPS needs to step in and do a really thorough assessment. I wouldn't be suprised if, goodness forbid, they do find Sky deceased, that the CPS workers involved previously in their case get scrutinized for their handling (or not handling) of the home situation.

You're right, Coldpizza -- OCD is troubling for those who have it (and your empathy is awesome!). Part of the diagnostic criteria for OCD is KNOWING that what you are doing/thinking is abnormal. That makes it particularly disturbing to the individual who experiences it because they know it looks abnormal to others but they just can't stop.

You can take heart, however, that OCD is one of the most treatable psychiatric disorders -- typically therapeutic work is time-limited (bonus!) and involves basic cognitive behavioral therapy, which is very evidence-based and, as such, almost always covered by insurance. I wish somebody had gotten JB help....
 

bbb28

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I am too very sickened after ready about the life SM has lived through just trying to keep his kids safe. When looking at the photos on the Flicker account I was amazed at how many photos were posted her daughter "just eating" or what every. That is OCD in itself. Also poor little Sky -- did he have photos made by himself.

Where in the world could little Sky be and why has she not been arrested based on the affidavit? How do you not let children sleep in their beds? How do you not get a 2-3 year old daughter up until 2:00. I also want to say that in my opinon the "Target" deal with more of JB telling SM that he had to let Sky sleep while they went into Target and SM went along with it to ensure no outburst from JB. When questioned he did not rat her out... IMO
 

dillysmom11

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Yes. So what? I write all of my client's declarations. That's why they hire attorneys. The process is this. They sit down with me and I have a pad. They vomit up a rambling, emotional mess of facts, thoughts, dates, etc. I ask them a ton of questions about anything significant. I then take spend a few hours putting together everything they said in a chronological, readable manner, so the court will understand the facts and opinions of the client. Most clients do not have the ability to write a factual legal declaration and/or to step outside their own emotional chaos at the moment and make what they need to tell the court, coherent, due to the overwhelmingly emotional nature of the proceedings. This is their life and they are often so flabbergasted, upset, scared that they cannot put it all together.

Bravo! An attorney with integrity! One I recently worked with on my adopted children's case (3rd party custody/ foster care) was full of it. I was constantly re-reading the declarations he "helped" me with (by editing, re-writing), sitting down at his computer and doing it right. Needless to say, we switched attorneys. I'm merely stating that some lawyers can, and do, embellish- and even change- facts. IMO
 

AbbeyR

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I had many of the same reactions as Smooth Operator reading the court documents. I'm so sorry for the father and for these children, and wish JB could have gotten (or perhaps, taken) the help she so obviously needed. What a tragic situation :(

But not upset enough to the point that she was able to go online to her flickr account and place a sun on dads face in that photo of her, dad and M. I know that photo was NOT in there the past couple of days when I first saw the photos in her account. That was done recently.

I don't think so... the photo was last replaced Sept. 4, 2011 (if you click on the camera model, Flickr takes you to the exif data and time photo was posted and/or replaced).
 

Magdalyn

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After reading through Dad's entire declaration, I'm utterly heartbroken for this family. What a mess. I agree with what others have said. I see no deception from the father. In fact, it looked like he was doing everything he could, and the system failed him, and the children. In a way, it also failed Julia, I suppose.

A side note: I have a hard time imagining, if Julia and the children lived with her mother through some of this, that Julia's mother had no idea how sick Julia really was. Yet she went along with Julia, it seems? Cindy Anthony anyone?

Anyway, to me, it seems equally as likely that either poor Sky died as a result of being neglected (either as result of an accident during the marathon mediation, or through lack of care, possibly through some illness in the last week) OR, after the mediation went in a way Julia didn't like, she felt the complulsion to do something drastic to 'get even' with the father.

I also think that's why Dad's polygraph was inconclusive. I think deep down he 'knows' Sky is dead. Doesn't know how or where or when. He just knows.
:(
 

Rougelatete

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I think she has some mental disorders, but, she's not mentally ill....like can't be held responsible mentally ill. I think she's just mainly mean.

I'm guessing a psychotic break happened when Sky disappeared but that she was rational at other points -- like when wanting to void the new custody agreement and when covering up a possible crime.

Of course, it's equally possible she didn't experience a psychotic break -- I'm just speculating based on her diagnoses, the severity of her known disorders, the fact that she was in a high stress situation in the mediation which can exacerbate symptoms, and that her kindapper story is so ludicrous.

But, she could have been perfectly, legally, sane the whole time. Regardless, I feel pretty sure she was perfectly, legally, sane before Sky went missing and -- even if not on the day she left the car abandoned (there's some real cognitive deficiences going on there), I do believe she was perfectly, legally sane shortly thereafter when she quit talking to LE.

I'm mostly entertaining the theory of psychotic break because I'm having trouble explaining why one child disappeared and the other didn't. If it was a true accident, she could have reported it. Other theories that do not include psychotic break are: JB neglected the children for a very long period of time (during the mediation?) and Sky met with a sad fate during that time which she would be blamed for and I also entertain the idea that she purposefully killed Sky because he's a male child (possible reasons include: SM was closer to him and she wanted to punish SM, he looked too much like SM, or that she preferred her daughter for various reasons).
 

GingerRed

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RSBM

A side note: I have a hard time imagining, if Julia and the children lived with her mother through some of this, that Julia's mother had no idea how sick Julia really was. Yet she went along with Julia, it seems? Cindy Anthony anyone?

I am continually shocked at parents who defend the indefensible with their children, even at the expense of their grandchildren. I'd like to think that I would tell my adult children to do the right thing, tell the truth and deal with the consequences, hoping the next generation would be better off for it. But we see it time and time again. Denial is a powerful force.

I never in a million years thought I'd face that with my own children's grandparents, but I have. They won't even listen to and look at the evidence proving their son's guilt and sickness. Instead, they bury their heads in the sand and call me the monster! Even worse, the grandfather has tried to keep my daughter quiet.

What is wrong with the world?
 
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