Found Deceased WY - Gabrielle ‘Gabby’ Petito, 22, Grand Teton National Park, 25 Aug 2021 #84

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cnmccarthy

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cnmccarthy

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Moo.... physical evidence was not showing assault. The police can take it out of a persons hands and charge felony assault without the person laying charges...if a person is show great injury.....but that was not the case. What was said to be witnessed is a mute point unless GP wants to lay charges. Moo

Unfortunately this is true, i just don’t understand why the media didn’t pay more attention to the call.
 

housewife

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So why is that? Young women today have access to so much more information and supports than a generation or two ago when the role of women was pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen and domestic violence wasn’t ever discussed. Has nothing changed?
Why put the responsibility of stopping DV on the victim?
Even smart, well informed people can be a victim of DV. Again, it's a form of psychological torture similar to brainwashing. DV can also encompass physical abuse, but the mental abuse is always there.
 

TL4S

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GP's parents didn't see any red flags, even looking back after-the-fact. The Moab police had the two involved parties telling the same sequence of events, despite being talked to separately. They did have the information about BL hitting GP, but after GP and BL describing the event, perhaps that witness's account appeared to have happened in a small window of time in the middle of the argument vs. telling the whole story. IDK. Moab police took around 2 hours with them, it was not taken lightly, imo. Some of the conduct is questionable, I agree, but maybe LE just didn't see any red flags, either.

My hope for an outcome is that not only do Moab police officers get extra training on what to look for in possible DV situations, but that the extra training reaches nationwide, teaching LE and others better what to look for.
 

housewife

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borndem

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Good stuff, @housewife -- hoping that will happen.
DV is often "handed-down" to the next generation, being either wife/partner abuse, and/or child abuse. If that's what you've seen or endured growing up, then that's how the world spins -- at least in some cases. The less that situation happens (here's hoping), then the less it will be "handed-down." SMH.
Gabby was indeed a victim of this, bless her sweet soul.
 

deadfoot13

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Why put the responsibility of stopping DV on the victim?
Even smart, well informed people can be a victim of DV. Again, it's a form of psychological torture similar to brainwashing. DV can also encompass physical abuse, but the mental abuse is always there.

BBM

For the simple fact that someone has to do it. Nothing seems to be effective in stopping people from being abusive. It's angering, frustrating, and sad that DV continues even in a day of education, advocacy, and support. So if nothing is effective in stopping the abuser, what, is it just left to be a topic of discussion until the end of time? No. The change needs to come from the other side and the person has to be responsible for preventing oneself from ever becoming a victim in the first place. Is it right, is it fair? No. Is it reality? Yes.
 

CP244

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Moo.... physical evidence was not showing assault. The police can take it out of a persons hands and charge felony assault without the person laying charges...if a person is show great injury.....but that was not the case. What was said to be witnessed is a mute point unless GP wants to lay charges. Moo
That may be the case in the US, but other countries have taken it out of the hands of frightened women and laid their own charges.
 

nao

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That may be the case in the US, but other countries have taken it out of the hands of frightened women and laid their own charges.
Moo....what are you talking about? Frightened of what? Police are not relationship councillors. If you feel unsafe the police will seperate you to de-esculate situation. But the police can do nothing about you returning to that situation or your dating choices. Moo
 

whiterhino

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Initially BL and GP were pulled over for driving erratically. What would have happened if they'd been charged? (or is that jut a fine, not from the U.S here).

The officer that was talking to Gabby noticed she had a scratch on her cheek and she admitted it was from Brian. The female officer tried to take Gabby aside and speak with her individually. The police told them to separate and gave them the space to do so. Personally I wish the police had been less casual and less friendly. At this point though, is it productive to question whether or not pressing charges could have changed the outcome?

The thing is that many couples who experience DV will return to their abusive relationship. IMO Brian and Gabby were very much in a honeymoon phase. It's not always one sided either. Not to victim blame but sometimes, especially in the beginning of DV, the other partner isn't used to the abuse and can not only be forgiving but also defensive and fight back. There's nothing wrong with defending oneself but in these cases it just escalates. Honestly, even walking away and taking a break often isn't enough. In the end, it's up to the individuals to recognize the abuse for themselves and make the choice to leave on their own (with support obv).

Again, JMHO Gabby didn't strike me as submissive or easily dominated. She struck me as sensitive, laid back, passive. Also just wanted to point out that her voice was so very quiet in the video, makes me think BL had put his hands on her before :(
 

whiterhino

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Moo....what are you talking about? Frightened of what? Police are not relationship councillors. If you feel unsafe the police will seperate you to de-esculate situation. But the police can do nothing about you returning to that situation or your dating choices. Moo
Frightened of their abuser. Correct though, the police are not counselors and as we know this situation did not cause either Brian or Gabby to leave the relationship. The police did try to deescalate, give some counsel and advised Brian and Gabby to separate.

I believe the poster was referring to the fact that laws are different in other countries. For example where I live, if an assault or abuse is suspected or evident, law enforcement can press charges without consent from the victim.
 

MistyWaters

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Frightened of their abuser. Correct though, the police are not counselors and as we know this situation did not cause either Brian or Gabby to leave the relationship. The police did try to deescalate, give some counsel and advised Brian and Gabby to separate.

I believe the poster was referring to the fact that laws are different in other countries. For example where I live, if an assault or abuse is suspected or evident, law enforcement can press charges without consent from the victim.

I can’t find the link at the moment but that’s exactly the reason the review criticized LE for not charging Gabby - she admitted to hitting Brian first even though he didn’t want to press charges. I think LE used judgement in their assessment of a mental health crisis because of other information she gave.

Gabby Petito missing: Footage offers insight into mental health of Gabrielle Petito and Brian Laundrie
“She told the officer they had been fighting all morning and that she suffers from anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder that impacts her behavior.

“I have really bad OCD, and I was just cleaning and straightening up, and I was apologizing to him saying that I’m so mean because sometimes I have OCD and get frustrated,” Petito said sniffling in the police video footage.

Laundrie said in the video that they began arguing when he climbed into the van with dirty feet and moved something.

Laundrie also told officers that he suffers from anxiety. At one point, the officer asked if he was always so hyper. Laundrie added that neither he nor Petito takes any medications for mental health.

Casey Collier, vice president of behavioral health at First Step in Sarasota, said with the couple's heightened emotions and mental states, anything could have set them into a mental crisis.

“As I watched it, I was thinking about anyone, even without mental health obstacles, in that kind of scenario for five months isolated in a small space. That's going to create stress for anyone,” Collier said. “And then you add to that the mental health problems they both reported... That's it's a recipe for disaster.”

Officers noted that Laundrie had scratches on his face and arms. He insisted he was OK and did not want to press charges.

The officer concluded that he does “not believe the situation escalated to the level of a domestic assault as much as that of a mental health crisis.”

Authorities then suggested the couple should separate for the night to “reset their mental states.” Laundrie was taken to a hotel. Petito took the camper. …”
 

MistyWaters

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Initially BL and GP were pulled over for driving erratically. What would have happened if they'd been charged? (or is that jut a fine, not from the U.S here).

The officer that was talking to Gabby noticed she had a scratch on her cheek and she admitted it was from Brian. The female officer tried to take Gabby aside and speak with her individually. The police told them to separate and gave them the space to do so. Personally I wish the police had been less casual and less friendly. At this point though, is it productive to question whether or not pressing charges could have changed the outcome?

The thing is that many couples who experience DV will return to their abusive relationship. IMO Brian and Gabby were very much in a honeymoon phase. It's not always one sided either. Not to victim blame but sometimes, especially in the beginning of DV, the other partner isn't used to the abuse and can not only be forgiving but also defensive and fight back. There's nothing wrong with defending oneself but in these cases it just escalates. Honestly, even walking away and taking a break often isn't enough. In the end, it's up to the individuals to recognize the abuse for themselves and make the choice to leave on their own (with support obv).

Again, JMHO Gabby didn't strike me as submissive or easily dominated. She struck me as sensitive, laid back, passive. Also just wanted to point out that her voice was so very quiet in the video, makes me think BL had put his hands on her before :(

It is very sad to watch this video she uploaded on August 19th but I think it’s fair to say she views Brian as her soul mate and the video is her very public statement of the closeness and intimacy the two share together. Considering this video was uploaded only days after the Moab crisis, I don’t think she was about to admit to anyone the relationship wasn’t working out, nor had she any thoughts of leaving him. If she had compulsive tendencies, maybe it also applied to her relationship with him, she wasn’t going to give it up regardless of his violent behaviour?

 

whiterhino

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It is very sad to watch this video she uploaded on August 19th but I think it’s fair to say she views Brian as her soul mate and the video is her very public statement of the closeness and intimacy the two share together. Considering this video was uploaded only days after the Moab crisis, I don’t think she was about to admit to anyone the relationship wasn’t working out, nor had she any thoughts of leaving him. If she had compulsive tendencies, maybe it also applied to her relationship with him, she wasn’t going to give it up regardless of his violent behaviour?


I'd forgotten about the part where Gabby mentions OCD and anxiety. Also totally forgot about the part where Gabby admits to being frustrated and hitting Brian.

The point of contention (I suppose) is that someone had called the police reporting that they thought they saw Brian hitting Gabby. When they were pulled over, this information never entered or factored into LE decision to not press charges against either one. So in the bodycam footage, all we see and know is that Gabby admitted to hitting Brian. There is no witness statement from anyone else to say they saw Brian previously hitting Gabby (except for the phone call and the officer pointing out the scratch on GPs' cheek). If that had been the case, both should've been charged. JMO.

Again I agree. Gabby and Brian appeared to be very much in love. It doesn't look like she'd intended to leave him anytime soon. Whatever happened between them seems to have built up over a long period of limited, shared space. I guess another unknowable question is would Brian and Gabby have fought like this at home or over time? Was it inevitable or avoidable? Everything about this is so sad, looking back it's hard to believe what happened.
 

Satchie

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I guess another unknowable question is would Brian and Gabby have fought like this at home or over time? Was it inevitable or avoidable? Everything about this is so sad, looking back it's hard to believe what happened.
RSBM

I think the fighting would have been inevitable, whatever the circumstance. Because all couples fight! And this was how they fought, even on a busy street. I think they would probably have kept it up until one of them finally decided to break.up with the other.

But whether it would have ended in murder? I really wonder.

Would BL have killed her if they were parked in a busy campground, or had an apartment somewhere, where everyone knew where they were?

I think that's probably less likely.

JMO
 
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