CO - Jessica Ridgeway, 10, Westminster, 5 Oct 2012 - #19

[Dr. Know?]

His father is currently in Mexico on business.

According to MSM link.

I hope for Austin's sake, he's coming home soon too. I wonder when he'll be flying back for his son soon? Is this PR?

jmo

 

[revampz]

I feel I can see both perspectives here as my teenage son is a total zombie killing gamer as well as loves anime.. But yet I dont get at all offended(imo mainly due to the fact that the questions and comments re:gaming and anime are not imo intended to be offensive, judgemental, etc) the fact is whether people like it or not there is some pretty bad chit in both violent games and really bad chit in the dark side of anime..those are facts, period they are not judgements about any of of our children that are big time gamers or lovers of anime..the fact exists that there is a reason for concern imo... No one is saying or indicating that our children who are big time gamers or lovers of anime need to kept an eye on cuz they may turn into a sick, deviant individual like ARS...thats not being even implied or alluded to in the least..

I fully agree with katydid's opinion on the desensitizing that occurs from the excessively violent games that many kids are exposed to..imo some may not want to believe that but imo its the Gods honest truth..now neither katy nor I are prudish, over bearing individuals who freak out about games, movies, etc..but rather are just aware of what the extreme violence of games and such POTENTIALLY CAN DO TO IMPRESSIONABLE YOUNG MINDS.. For me I believe that as a parent its my job to limit my childs gaming of the zombie killing that if allowed to my child would play 24/7.. There sadly are children who are allowed to play 24/7, along with completely immersed in the extreme violence of movies and unsupervised internet access..this without a doubt will absolutely desensitize even the best of kids if allowed the total immersion into these types media that a child without guidelines, boundaries, and supervision are very likely to do.. Does it mean your child will be a serial killer?..no, but regardless imo the child does suffer negative impacts from it..

These are not offensive judgements that are being made here wrt to gaming, anime, etc.. They are honest discussions about the very real dangers and negative effects that any impressionable young person is going to unfortunately have with unhealthy immersion into these medias..

As far as what sarx is speaking about imo she is not talking about the mostly benign anime that the majority of our teenagers love..but rather the very dark and very real existence of anime *advertiser censored* including pedophilia, incest, and beastiality just to name a couple.. For any who do not believe or doubt or even think that what im speaking of is exaggerated I suggest you simply one time go to your google search box(WITHOUT THE SAFE SEARCH SETTINGS ON) and simply type into that search box just the word "ANIME" .. I can promise you within those very first google results you will have a link to ANIME *advertiser censored* THAT INCLUDES PEDOPHILIA, INCEST, BEASTIALITY..its very much there and its very much dark and poses a danger to our impressionable youth..

I informed my son of it before he got introduced to it by his peers..sadly that type chit exists and is all around our childrens peers and I wanted him to know ahead of time what type dark perversion that existed in the anime world..

These extremely negative facets of what is our children's entertainment outlets very much exists and when there is an adolescent such as ASR that is already predispositioned to many different factors due to possibly genetics, due to a violent, unstable environment within which he was raised...when adding to that these extremely dark, violent, perversions that are very much alive and well in media such as gaming and anime.. The negative impacts imo are absolutely explosive..

It is this that is the basis for which these topics are broached here at ws in a case such as this.. It is absolutely NOT brought up to judge or point fingers at those of us whose kids happen to love gaming and anime.. Thats just not what is going on here.. The media exists..imo its absolutely a relevant topic in this case with an adolescent brutal murderer and for it to be taken as offensive or judgemental just is not what is at all meant by those who have broached these subjects..

All jmo from a momma whose teenage son is an avid gamer of killing zombies and a huge fan of anime...

am just catching up....again......and have to say that this post is what I would have loved to write.....direct, to the point and no BS....it also is how I feel...ok back to reading.

 

[MsFacetious]

I hope for Austin's sake, he's coming home soon too. I wonder when he'll be flying back for his son soon? Is this PR?

jmo

I'm a little more curious about how he was allowed to leave the state.
It hasn't been that long since his last arrest.
Is he not on parole/probation or federal supervision?

 

[Confusion]

I personally don't think an addiction to internet *advertiser censored* is the cause of his problems; I think it's more likely a symptom of them.

 

[SmoothOperator]

BBM, he hasn't?

Nope last we heard LE were still looking for the crime scene where he dismembered her at.. After searching the home thoroughly it was said the home is not where it was done...

MOO is jilly is likely correct in that he is not at all telling ALL OF THE TRUTH, but rather only what suits his interests..and one of those interests could very well be watching lE have to play this *advertiser censored*'s game of putting the puzzle pieces together to figure it out..jmo..

 

[Dr. Know?]

I'm a little more curious about how he was allowed to leave the state.
It hasn't been that long since his last arrest.
Is he not on parole/probation or federal supervision?

Me too but you said it much better..ty

 

[GrainneDhu]

What 15 year old boy with an internet doesn't have *advertiser censored* addiction?

Not making light of it but what one may constitute an addiction another may think of as normal behavior of a boy who probably doesn't have many of those type of encounters with girls.

I'm not an expert but I believe that one of the criteria for many addictions which involve normal behaviour taken to extremes is whether or not the behaviour interferes with every day life. I would hope that a therapist would carefully build a diagnosis rather than simply plunge into treatment of something that might be perfectly normal.

 

[Ghostwheel]

You know, we can blame *advertiser censored* or video games all day long for kids troubles these days, but in reality we use them as.scapegoats for the real problem.... lack of parental guidance. And not just any parental guidance, but PROPER guidance. Children should not have computers or other technological devices with internet access until they are old enough to properly use them. Computers should be in a family area of the house, not in bedrooms. Children who are monitored by parents while doing homework will have no trouble laying off the *advertiser censored*. For many of us, there is no such thing as a "little" *advertiser censored*. Naked bodies are for intimacy between a couple, not public viewing. If we don't teach children that things are special and sacred, how will they learn to treat them this way when they are grown? Children should not be playing video games with violent depictions. There's so much more to life than all that crap and we are turning little brains to mush. My children have absolutely no idea of the existence of most of this stuff. Children won't develop addictions to gaming if they are not purchased for them.

I don't care what the rest of the world is doing... I guess I'm old school. Read a book. Or go outside and play in the fresh air.

You know, I remember a term used when computers first came into mainstream society: GIGO. Garbage in, garbage out. That applies to little children, as well. We will only quit being shocked at the garbage they put out when we quit letting them put the garbage in!!

Off my soapbox... and I'm sorry if I offend those of you who have posted in defense of gaming. We have a Wii and Mario Kart is the goriest game we've got.... and they can only play that on Saturdays anyway. While I understand that for many of you, it is a normal part of life... and I'm not judging that.... I'm just trying to share that for many of us, it is not. While we have much technology around this house.. too much, if you ask me....my children can only use them on weekends. Even the TV stays off during the week. My kids had a bucket of fun this afternoon. Literally. With a bunch of brand new tennis balls I picked up at Academy and a game they invented themselves.

We MUST empower ourselves as parents.

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So with you there. Our "living room" is actually the computer and book room. Computers face into the room (we call it the bull pen) and the wall to the dining room is half size, so open space, easy to see. Anyone can walk in at any time. I check the history, cookies and temp internet files on a regular basis. And anyone is welcome to check mine (although they haven't since my last search on dismemberment....JK) It's part of the agreement for getting to have a computer. But everyone DOES play Minecraft together.... (BTW, no cable TV here, either, but we love Netflix)

 

[GrainneDhu]

I completely agree! I looked this up not long ago for another case/post, but it makes me sick how "prison time" isn't "real" time. i.e. 1 day in prison equals 3 "real" days. I'm a little ashamed to admit it but I've known someone sentenced to 12 years in prison who was out in much less time (IIRC under 2 years?). It wasn't for a violent crime and I know the math doesn't work, I'm sure there is more to it, but it's disgusting. IMO. Don't put hours/days/years on a sentence if they're completely fake, IMO.

However, there is a practical reason to offer time off for good behaviour: it works. It reduces inmate offences and gives them a reason to remain compliant with prison staff, etc.

There is a lot of unpleasant behaviour that cannot be defined as criminal but is just plain icky to deal with. Giving prisoners an incentive to cooperate with prison staff makes for a better and somewhat safer environment for the staff.

 

[revampz]

But I think he may be right. I do believe that internet *advertiser censored* plays a bigger part in these crimes than many of us know. There are a lot of teens that are addicted to these SICK VIOLENT *advertiser censored* sites.

I am NOT talking about regular, soft *advertiser censored*. I am not talking about the type that a couple watches together to spice up their night. I am talking about violent, gruesome images that include bestialty, or torture and /or incest. People would be surprised at how many teens are being swept up in this chit.

...my 7 & 8 year old boys came across a site while googling for a very innocent kids game......my 7 year old told me what he saw one girl do another girl...........I cried for days and was convinced they were going to be messed up......I was told to just not mention it again......so now the kids dont go on the computer unless we are around and they have never mentioned it again (think it confused them)...

I am going to get bashed for this...so will go and make dinner after this.....but you know when I was a teen, kids didnt sit around all day and kill things for hours on end on a computer or watch every type of sexual act you can imagine.......yep may have played soldiers and got hold of a playboy or similar, but the internet has bought all of this to a whole new level and I personally think it is wrong, very wrong and out of control and people too accepting of it...

The innocence of children is being taken too young by the things they are viewing on the internet.

You know you go to a motivational speaker (and I've been to quite a few) they will tell you to say over and over " I can do it, I am this and I am that"...etc..........what is watching the killing and maiming of other humans for hours on end doing to these brains. I am sorry but call me old fashioned, my children will not be playing these games for hours on end.........I personally think it does desensitise (not sure if a word) them to violence......or maybe make them think it is more normal that it is...

I dont know, I just dont think that all the changes the internet has bought to the world are good....especially for children...

and if it is true, being in counselling at the age of 15 for an addiction to *advertiser censored*............dang.

My opinion only and absolutely meaning no offence to anyone.

 

[katydid23]

I personally don't think an addiction to internet *advertiser censored* is the cause of his problems; I think it's more likely a symptom of them.

OH, I agree. Lots and lots of teen boys look up dirty pictures on the net. Most look and then move on. Others get all caught up in it. I think that those who have a void and some emotional issues are much more likely to become obsessed with *advertiser censored*/drugs/violent images.

 

[aust amateur slueth]

With all due respect, how old are your kids? I think we will have the conversation again when they are old enough to drive and have laptops. You cannot keep kids away from these kinds of temptations once they become teens. So you may find that , as careful and cautious and responsible a parent as you are, even your kids MIGHT fall into some of these waiting traps.JMO

I have to agree with you, my mother for example would not let us children have soft drink, lollies or brand new clothes (as examples), the moment we were out of her control we all gravitated towards things that she had withheld. I for example had a bad coca cola habit for many years, it took me years to undo the damage that my mother had set my siblings and I up for.


What she should have done educated us about temptations and taught us how to make good choices and what was okay in moderation.

Having now raised my own child to young adulthood I've found my way of discussing these things with my daughter and the reasons for certain decisions instead of the old 'because I said so' has meant my daughter has learnt how to make sensible decisions for herself. Even now that she is legally of age she rings me to tell me when she arrives at or leaves destinations and at home the only place she uses her laptop is in the lounge room.

real communication and teaching your children the skills to make good healthy decisions is something all parents should do right from when their children are young.

 

[GrainneDhu]

It bothered me that Dad was living in that mansion, while mom was declaring bankruptcy. Couldn't he help her out, considering his sons were living with her? How stressful was that for his kids?

Some men just don't care.

Even someone who became as mega-rich as John Lennon. While the Beatles were still together and making money hand over fist, he was sending his ex-wife a pittance in child support. Julian Lennon has said publicly that Paul McCartney showed more concern and gave him more emotional support than his own father did.

I cannot understand how such men can hold their heads up in public. I just don't get it.

 

[Ghostwheel]

With all due respect, how old are your kids? I think we will have the conversation again when they are old enough to drive and have laptops. You cannot keep kids away from these kinds of temptations once they become teens. So you may find that , as careful and cautious and responsible a parent as you are, even your kids MIGHT fall into some of these waiting traps.JMO

BBM. I respectfully disagree. You CAN keep your kids away from these temptations, you just have to be paying attention. I agree you may not be able to stop them from the first time, but you can always keep them from any subsequent times. It just isn't easy, but if you wanted easy, you wouldn't be a parent. And yes, mine drive and have laptops. And, oddly enough, don't even WANT all the latest and greatest gadgets, refuse to have Facebook accounts ("Who needs the drama?"), do not know or care who the Kardashians are, and like inviting friends over to bake bread. (who also, oddly, enjoy coming over and doing so)

It can be done.

 

[T4Tide]

With all due respect, how old are your kids? I think we will have the conversation again when they are old enough to drive and have laptops. You cannot keep kids away from these kinds of temptations once they become teens. So you may find that , as careful and cautious and responsible a parent as you are, even your kids MIGHT fall into some of these waiting traps.JMO

My oldest two are almost 13 and 11, and they do have laptops, actually. They may only use them in the family room when my husband and I are present. I frequently check their internet history to monitor what they are looking at. It's my JOB to teach them right from wrong and show them the right paths to take. If AS was "addicted" to *advertiser censored* when he was 15 yrs old, he had been viewing it well before then and he was NOT being monitored closely.

I know they will not be perfect children, and will make some mistakes, but a good bit of these mistakes are preventable. I know that it can be done because I have seen it. In myself, in my husband, in my nieces and nephews, and lots of friends' older children. I know they probably exist, but I do not personally know ONE child who have online histories like those we see on WS. Maybe we live sheltered, unexciting lives according the rest of the world, but hey...we like it here.

When I was in the 10th grade, my brother and I were late coming home from the first dance of the year, and we lied about it. My parents quickly divided us, figured out our stories didn't match, and conquered. lol. We were grounded from school activities for the rest of the year. From September to May and they didn't forget. I was never again.... not one time.... late for curfew, which was midnight until the day I got moved out at 21. I learned my lesson. I've never been drunk.. to this very day....because my parents had a zero tolerance for alcohol. Never snuck out. Was I perfect? Of course not, but I knew my parents meant business and it kept me in line. Too many parents are just worried about their kid "liking" them or they are too wrapped up in their own drama filled lives to care what's going on.


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[T4Tide]

OH, I agree. Lots and lots of teen boys look up dirty pictures on the net. Most look and then move on. Others get all caught up in it. I think that those who have a void and some emotional issues are much more likely to become obsessed with *advertiser censored*/drugs/violent images.

I have to confess. We did look up "sex" in the dictionary and get a thrill out of spelling "hell" on an upside down calculator by putting in 7734. When it came to *advertiser censored*, jingly boobies in a National Geographic was as good as it got.

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[StormyNights]

Sorry if already posted.

740 KVOR ‏@740KVOR
Alleged Jessica Ridgeway killer, Austin Sigg, says there are other human remains under his house
https://twitter.com/740KVOR

I am just trying to catch up, but this literally made the hair on the back of my neck stand straight up. What is wrong in this world?? I am just so frustrated, scared for my own kids and even myself! I have been a long time "lurker" on this site. I have just recently registered during Whitney's case. I must say that since becoming a part of this site I have become hyper aware of my surroundings and have also taken the opportunity to speak with my children about the very real dangers of this world. How does one make SURE your kids understand the real gravity of the evil without totally scarring the bejeezus out of them? I want them to feel safe, but I also don't want to take away their innocent childhood. So frustrating and makes me so furious :furious:
YKWIM? I am just so fearful about what this world will be like when my babies are adult with children of their own :notgood: Lord, help us all!!!

​

 

[katydid23]

I have to agree with you, my mother for example would not let us children have soft drink, lollies or brand new clothes (as examples), the moment we were out of her control we all gravitated towards things that she had withheld. I for example had a bad coca cola habit for many years, it took me years to undo the damage that my mother had set my siblings and I up for.


What she should have done educated us about temptations and taught us how to make good choices and what was okay in moderation.

Having now raised my own child to young adulthood I've found my way of discussing these things with my daughter and the reasons for certain decisions instead of the old 'because I said so' has meant my daughter has learnt how to make sensible decisions for herself. Even now that she is legally of age she rings me to tell me when she arrives at or leaves destinations and at home the only place she uses her laptop is in the lounge room.

real communication and teaching your children the skills to make good healthy decisions is something all parents should do right from when their children are young.

THANK YOU. That was what I was trying to say. I felt it was important to educate our kids about the temptations awaiting them, and help them to avoid those traps. But my kids had their own laptops as teens. I didn't make them sit in the living room to be on their computers. But I did have their FB passwords and I did occasionally do History searches to see where they had been. Neither of them ever accepted IM's or PMs from strangers though.

I never liked video games, but my son LOVED them, and when we moved to a new town, and he didn't have many friends yet, and his main way of staying in contact with his 2 best friends back home was by playing games online with them, we said okay. It was the lesser of two evils, imo. It was middle school and a brutal time for him to move to a new town. And I figured there were worse things he could be doing and at least he was here in his room.

Sometimes when a parent withholds something, it ends up making that withheld thing an object of desire. Never tell your daughter that you hate her boyfriend until she is already wanting to dump him. LOL

 

[aust amateur slueth]

Too many parents are just worried about their kid "liking" them or they are too wrapped up in their own drama filled lives to care what's going on.

That is one of my biggest bug bears, children have friends and will make other friends too, they don't need their parents to be their friends. They need their parents to love them, nurture them and teach them, they will only ever have one mother and one father.

That doesn't mean you can't be friendly towards your children, you should but knowing where to draw the line is important.

 

[T4Tide]

THANK YOU. That was what I was trying to say. I felt it was important to educate our kids about the temptations awaiting them, and help them to avoid those traps. But my kids had their own laptops as teens. I didn't make them sit in the living room to be on their computers. But I did have their FB passwords and I did occasionally do History searches to see where they had been. Neither of them ever accepted IM's or PMs from strangers though.

I never liked video games, but my son LOVED them, and when we moved to a new town, and he didn't have many friends yet, and his main way of staying in contact with his 2 best friends back home was by playing games online with them, we said okay. It was the lesser of two evils, imo. It was middle school and a brutal time for him to move to a new town. And I figured there were worse things he could be doing and at least he was here in his room.

Sometimes when a parent withholds something, it ends up making that withheld thing an object of desire. Never tell your daughter that you hate her boyfriend until she is already wanting to dump him. LOL

I think we are all on the same page here. :thumbup:


Talking, monitoring, loving, withholding, punishing, guiding, teaching.... They ALL have a place in parenting and can't be effective without the others.


The simple fact that we are here on WS, loving these children who are not our own, and aching for those (even perps) who do not have the safe and secure homes our own children do, shows that we all have a kindred yearning for hope and happiness for all our little ones.
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