If interested, just tell the funeral home that you desire the same services normally reserved for devout jews. You will be washed off under a sheet in a dignified manner. You can be placed in any clothing of your choosing. You will not be placed in a grave liner or "vault". A special wooden casket will be used. It is built without metal or decoration of any kind. It is dovetailed and glued on the corners. When placed directly in the ground, the bottom neatly slides out and you are in contact with the ground. Dust to dust naturally. You do not have to be embalmed in any state in this country unless you plan to have a drawn-out service that includes a public viewing. Then they will use "health" concerns to push for embalming. There is NO law that requires embalming except for some cases of shipping or of crutzfeld-jacobs disease. Not even aids is an exception. The truth is that a fresh dead human body really poses no health crisis. The only reason for embalming is for display. It doesn't prevent decay or eventual decomposition and a sealed casket only ensures a messy situation when the gases build up and have no where to go. This causes the body to explode inside the casket, which is not what any of us want. So ask for the "kosher" treatment with next-day burial. And graveside services. As a funeral veteran, I considered all of the options for myself and my loved ones. This is my decision for me and my husband's decision for him.
A mausoleum would have been my other choice until I learned the disgusting secrets of this choice. You must be embalmed to be placed in a mausoleum crypt. After the family leaves, the casket is pulled back out later, usually that night. The casket is wrapped in what is called a "disaster pack" which consists of an absorbent bottom material and plastic wrap. There is also a slight downward trough in the back of each crypt that empties outside or into the ground. This is for the drainage of fluid. In short, after a short period of time, the gases in the casket once again have no where to go and the body will explode in the casket. We would go into the mausoleum early in the morning and check for fluid dripping down the front of the marble. We would always find some. That's what collects in the carpet in front of the crypts that attracts those little gnats (grave gnats) that will never go away. If embalming was really effective, then these bugs would die if they fed from the fluid. Yet they thrive. At night, bright bright lights are used to attract them into a box that is brought out. It looks like a giant bug zapper. The battle never ends. And large amounts of you just flow out the pipe in the back of the crypt until you finally become dried out. And that's the real truth. Never ever touch the carpet in a mausoleum or sit to pray on the floor. Every now and then, the morning would reveal a crypt cover blown completely off of a grave slot.
My aussie friend, your country is famous for the fact that almost all of the funeral workers there are women. It fascinates me. I'm hoping that this tradition shows more respect for the deceased. I have been told that this is the case there and that they are referred to as "the ladies in white" or something very much like that. America has the most bizarre and ridiculous customs of the civilized world. And it is an industry that uses pressure at a most vulnerable time to practically force people to conform. To dot every I and to cross every T. My advice is to buy your own wooden casket wholesale way ahead of time (assuming that you would know...lol) and find a cemetery that does not require a grave liner or vault. Most older cemeteries do not require one, but most new ones do because it makes it so much easier to mow and maintain because the graves never settle or have any natural differences occur over time. Most of America's beautiful old cemeteries are so beautiful because of the gently rolling natural areas that have occured with time because of this settling. But now the focus is on cost-cutting when it comes to maintanance, which also dictates that many cemeteries will only allow flat stones because they can mow around them. Let's face it, they are ugly and stark.
People with a heart usually have to leave this line of work. You begin to wonder if it is right to take people's money for things that don't exist. Don't get embalmed. It's plastic surgery for the dead. If you want it, do it now while you can enjoy it. Embalming does not improve the decomp situation. It only preserves the body for visitation, and many times doesn't even hold up well through this. Every day, we checked for ooze and numerous other offensive problems. With families spread out, this is becoming very common. We weren't even allowed (by LAW) to say that embalming preserved a human body. When asked, we were told to say "it will last just as long as you are here to think about it". That alone should get you shut down.
A friend will help you move, but a real friend will help you move the bodies. I know that some of this is disgusting, but people have a right to know that they are being swindled by major funeral homes that probably bought your local "hometown" funeral home too. They just don't advertise it and they kept the previous owner's well-known name on everything and no one knows the difference. But they treat a deceased person like a giant k-mart blue light special, taking from the bereaved and whatever they can from the departed. The next worse things besides body part stealing? Say an old couple has had a prepaid preplanned funeral written up for 20 years. Maybe they are childless or outlived everyone. Perfect. When the second one dies and no one is there to see, they put them in a pressed board box instead of the nice casket that was picked out. And the whole time, they have been getting rich off of the interest from these good peoples' money. Just the tip of the iceberg. Be very careful and don't be afraid to order the "kosher" way of no embalming and the wooden casket with sliding bottom. Then they know not to bother you because you've done your research and know the score. They're not going to lunch on me or my loved ones!
Sorry to offend but people need to know and many of us veterans are trying to spread the word. Maybe we feel guilty having knowledge that everyone has the right to have. I think that's it wrong to know something like this and not share it with all I can share it with. From the first day in mortuary school, you learn it's about the bottom line, not anything else. It helps if you are a sociopath who doesn't feel the pain of others.
Peace to you all and inform yourselves. Sorry for the length of this.
mho