I do not see her as a culprit by any means, Steely. However I do not think she took on the role of partner and spouse to a loved one with bi-polar and or depression. I also find it hard to believe she was not aware of his struggles.
I am married to an addict who has been clean for 20 years. I am very sensitive of his needs and his demons that exacerbate his desire to self-medicate.
In 20 years, he has not relapsed, and that makes him a rarity, but I am ever vigilant because when you are committed to a person with emotional issues or addiction, you also commit to their disease. You go into it eyes wide open.
I can say, because of my experience, that not checking on a loved one who has been in a down cycle for months is indicative of "checking out".
It does not make her responsible for Robin's suicide. That is all on him. But it does give pause that if she were so disconnected from him, might that have not been BECAUSE of his depressive state, but rather the TRIGGER for his condition.
If his relatively new wife was already in a separate bedroom, not concerned with her husband's mental state, what does that say about her love for him? And if you are a person suffering from depression, might the indifference of the person whom you trust the most be a trigger for the most dangerous reactivity for a depressed person?
That is all I was intimating. Only I have probably said more in this post than in previous ones, and mods, I apologize if this is a no-no. I just want to emphasize the importance of being PRESENT for loved ones who are addicts, depressed, or living with other emotional pain.
When you commit to a person who is battling _________, remember that you, too are battling__________.
