SANDRA BIRCHMORE, Stoughton, MA

[waterslyd]

MY BLOOD BOILS OVER THIS ONE. ARRRGH> NONE OF THESE MEN HAVE FACED ANY CONSEQUENCES.
Mass Guy- Can you believe this???? I am a native of Westwood, MA. My mom lives right by the line with Canton. Compared to where I live currently (Kansas City) MA seeems like a separate safer planet. Not anymore.

3 Ex-Stoughton Officers Had ‘Deeply Troubling' Relationships With Woman Who Later Died

Three former police officers in Stoughton, Massachusetts, had inappropriate sexual relationships with a young woman who died by suicide last year after becoming pregnant, the department’s chief said Friday after a lengthy internal investigation revealed the “serious misconduct.” Stoughton Police...

www.nbcboston.com

 

[Laughing]

@MassGuy , OP missed the @ imho.

Horrible!

 

[weepingangel]

If I see one more headine/article referring to this as “relationships” between those scum and that poor girl (when it started iirc she was 13-15) my head will explode. Wtf.

 

[borndem]

This young woman must have seen that suicide was the only way out -- her only escape.
What esso-b's those men were.
She was young when she met them and she trusted them. Probably admired them until...

Hoping that we will see that something will be done soon. These former police officers were supposed to be held to a higher standard since they were in law enforcement -- people who should have set good examples. This cannot stand. Surely a lot of eyes are on this thing.

 

[waterslyd]

This young woman must have seen that suicide was the only way out -- her only escape.
What esso-b's those men were.
She was young when she met them and she trusted them. Probably admired them until...

Hoping that we will see that something will be done soon. These former police officers were supposed to be held to a higher standard since they were in law enforcement -- people who should have set good examples. This cannot stand. Surely a lot of eyes are on this thing.

Still no real consequences for these 3 guys. They "might" never be police again in the state of Massachusetts. That is no where near enough punishment for what they are. Child molesters. Disgusting good ol boy network. Misogyny runs so deep everywhere. They considered Sandra a toy for them to play with and use until she broke. I also feel sad for their wives.

 

[Laughing]

Still no real consequences for these 3 guys. They "might" never be police again in the state of Massachusetts. That is no where near enough punishment for what they are. Child molesters. Disgusting good ol boy network. Misogyny runs so deep everywhere. They considered Sandra a toy for them to play with and use until she broke. I also feel sad for their wives.

Here's an idea:


image from goodreads.com

Maybe an M, R, or a P?

jmho ymmv lrr

 

[Yemelyan]

There is a podcast about the circumstances surrounding Sandra's death: The Case

 

[borndem]

Thanks, @Yemelyan, for the reference to The Case. I'm almost afraid to find out what it says...

 

[Yemelyan]

A wrongful death lawsuit was filed yesterday naming all three former police officers as defendants: Former police officers sued in connection with death of pregnant woman

"(The officers) undertook to engage in inappropriate relationships with the decedant, who was a minor when the sexual relationships were initiated, abusing her trust and adoration of law enforcement, which through their inappropriate and undue influence, ultimately led her to allegedly take her own life," the lawsuit states."

In addition to wrongful death, the lawsuit alleges assault and battery on Birchmore and multiple forms of negligence. The Town of Stoughton and the Stoughton Police Department are also named as defendants in the lawsuit.

The suit was filed by attorneys for Darlene Smith in her capacity as representative of Birchmore's estate.

 

[HarmonyE.]

I knew Sandra a little through one of my kids. Sweet kid, but very young for her age and maybe a little on the slower side intellectually. Her teen years were full of sadness and loss, and those animals exploited this.

I do not believe she committed suicide. There is a video of her be-bopping around that very afternoon/evening, coming down to clean off her car during a major storm and talking on the phone. She reportedly communicated with a co-worker about work hours the following day. Not the actions of someone with a plan to end her life.

I was shocked to learn the method of her alleged suicide. I just cannot see someone like Sandra ending her life like that - it would have required research and planning to pull it off and that just wasn't like her. The cop on the other hand had surely seen it before. He was in her apartment for a half hour.

 

[waterslyd]

*SKETCHYYYYYY* And with his buddies being the ones who would investigate, they could have easily staged something and covered it up. I dont know if that's what happened. But coincidentally she was pregnant with his baby and I am guessing he did not want his wife to find out. SO sad.

 

[HarmonyE.]

*SKETCHYYYYYY* And with his buddies being the ones who would investigate, they could have easily staged something and covered it up. I dont know if that's what happened. But coincidentally she was pregnant with his baby and I am guessing he did not want his wife to find out. SO sad.

Sandra's death was initially investigated by a neighboring police department as she died in Canton, not Stoughton and there is no info that indicates she was involved with anyone on the Canton police force. I really don't think they knew anything was amiss at that point. I think everyone just assumed it was a suicide and as such didn't really do much of an investigation.

What I do find very hard to believe is that no one else at SPD knew what was going on with these four Stoughton cops (one allegedly involved officer for some reason is not named in the civil suit) and Sandra and/or other young girls or women. I've heard several people say Sandra was seen in public with both Devine and Mathew Farwell at different times, at least one time in a Stoughton restaurant with, I believe, Devine. And Sandra talked. A lot.

Parallel to any investigation into Sandra's death, I do hope the state is doing a thorough investigation into who knew what when at the SPD. The department has had a terrible reputation for many years and this can't be brushed under the rug.

 

[waterslyd]

Sandra's death was initially investigated by a neighboring police department as she died in Canton, not Stoughton and there is no info that indicates she was involved with anyone on the Canton police force. I really don't think they knew anything was amiss at that point. I think everyone just assumed it was a suicide and as such didn't really do much of an investigation.

What I do find very hard to believe is that no one else at SPD knew what was going on with these four Stoughton cops (one allegedly involved officer for some reason is not named in the civil suit) and Sandra and/or other young girls or women. I've heard several people say Sandra was seen in public with both Devine and Mathew Farwell at different times, at least one time in a Stoughton restaurant with, I believe, Devine. And Sandra talked. A lot.

Parallel to any investigation into Sandra's death, I do hope the state is doing a thorough investigation into who knew what when at the SPD. The department has had a terrible reputation for many years and this can't be brushed under the rug.

You're right, it happened in Canton. Can't believe I overlooked that; I'm from Westwood! (Town right next to Canton). It's just so sad. Places I thought felt safe were NOT; a very unsettling realization. Thank the universe every day that I was surrounded by adults who were loving and vigilant about spotting predators. Not blaming Sandra's family; theses child molesters have to be so slick and tricky and expert charming liars to get access to the young people that they prey on.
I have a PSA that every person over age 18 needs to hear or be taught in school or SOMETHING. Like an intro into becoming an adult. Psychology 101. If it's not mandatory for all it should be.
Disclaimer : I'm sorry, but in my experience,in our society currently, it is MEN who really need to read this because it could SAVE THEM from SO much trouble in their life. GUYS, it may help you not make these terrible decisions and it could keep you out of PRISON.

AHEM:
What grown men need to know about when a child "comes on" to them or makes advances towards them that they interpret as sexual advances, is this: What those children are really looking for is love and attention and they've been given the wrong messages about what love is and they have figured out enough to know that sex is something that gets grown ups attention but they don't really understand what they're doing with that. Even if it seems like they're happy and even if it seems like they want to be in a relationship The relationship they want is different from what an adult wants and that's why an adult has to draw the line. Draw a firm boundary between them and something sexual from happening. The adult has to be the one that says 'this may be tempting' (ugh, trying not to judge) but 'I'm going to refuse this because it's not right.' There is a clear line that you can't cross because otherwise it will negatively affect this child for the rest of their life.
There is a commonly held idea abut children who are abused. It's that some of them will continue the cycle of abuse when they became adults. The reason it sometimes rings true is not the reason people would think. (That it's because they are permanently damaged, which I don't believe AT ALL because there is hope for everyone to heal.) It's actually because They don't know appropriate boundaries of healthy relationships. The abuse they suffered muddled their ideas and experience of what is life affirming and not detrimental treatment of a child. It is not their fault.
Be mindful and honest with yourself when you're motivated to do something with a child because of your own selfish needs. Think of them first, Keep them safe.

 

[RayzrTuck]

A wrongful death lawsuit was filed yesterday naming all three former police officers as defendants: Former police officers sued in connection with death of pregnant woman

"(The officers) undertook to engage in inappropriate relationships with the decedant, who was a minor when the sexual relationships were initiated, abusing her trust and adoration of law enforcement, which through their inappropriate and undue influence, ultimately led her to allegedly take her own life," the lawsuit states."

In addition to wrongful death, the lawsuit alleges assault and battery on Birchmore and multiple forms of negligence. The Town of Stoughton and the Stoughton Police Department are also named as defendants in the lawsuit.

The suit was filed by attorneys for Darlene Smith in her capacity as representative of Birchmore's estate.

Would anyone know if an autopsy was performed and what the results were?

 

[RayzrTuck]

I just learned of Sandra Birchmore's story a few days ago and it is stuck in my head. I posted the story on TikTok recently and someone who claimed to know Sandra said that she was excited to be a mother. This person cannot believe Sandra committed suicide.

 

[HarmonyE.]

Would anyone know if an autopsy was performed and what the results were?

There was an autopsy as I understand it but media has not been able to get ahold of it. Ongoing investigation is probably the reason it's not been released. Let's hope.

I just learned of Sandra Birchmore's story a few days ago and it is stuck in my head. I posted the story on TikTok recently and someone who claimed to know Sandra said that she was excited to be a mother. This person cannot believe Sandra committed suicide.

Everyone who knew Sandra well said she wanted the baby and no one believes she killed herself. Her last text communications were with a co-worker about work hours for the following morning as there was a big snowstorm going on and she worked at a school. Just a few hours before Farwell shows up, she can be seen on CCTV coming in and out of her apartment building to clear snow off her car. Not the actions of someone on the verge of ending her life.

Could Farwell have pushed her over the edge with verbal attacks that upset her to the point of suicide? I suppose it is possible, but I find it hard to believe that she would have known how to successfully asphyxiate herself from a seated position without some planning and research. And as she abruptly stopped texting around the time Farwell left it's almost a certainty that she died that night.

 

[typical_vacation]

Absolutely blanking disgusting. I hate this. I’m hoping to see some sort of justice for Sandra and her loved ones.

 

[Charlot123]

The whole situation is ugly shocking, I just found out about it.

A little bit surprising because it happens in MA, but maybe there is a difference between a large city full of students coming to get the best education, and the locals whose ancestors had lived in the area since the revolutionary wars, and who form own network that is dense because the state is so small. Also, from my memories, MA was the bastion of liberty, with many churches being of Unitarian type, etc, etc. It doesn’t mean that there are no deeply conservative roots in the state; they are just a minority. An old boys’ mentality might well exist; it is just not pervasive.
This story is concerning because of sheer lack of common sense in these cops. Whatever the kid felt or wanted, they knew they were violating the law. (Also - one wonders how they would deal with potential complaints of other minors about being sexually abused by adults, for example.)

And yes, the whole death feels fishy to me.

 

[waterslyd]

The whole situation is ugly shocking, I just found out about it.

A little bit surprising because it happens in MA, but maybe there is a difference between a large city full of students coming to get the best education, and the locals whose ancestors had lived in the area since the revolutionary wars, and who form own network that is dense because the state is so small. Also, from my memories, MA was the bastion of liberty, with many churches being of Unitarian type, etc, etc. It doesn’t mean that there are no deeply conservative roots in the state; they are just a minority. An old boys’ mentality might well exist; it is just not pervasive.
This story is concerning because of sheer lack of common sense in these cops. Whatever the kid felt or wanted, they knew they were violating the law. (Also - one wonders how they would deal with potential complaints of other minors about being sexually abused by adults, for example.)

And yes, the whole death feels fishy to me.

Your post is spot on. I agree with all of it.

 

[HarmonyE.]

The whole situation is ugly shocking, I just found out about it.

A little bit surprising because it happens in MA, but maybe there is a difference between a large city full of students coming to get the best education, and the locals whose ancestors had lived in the area since the revolutionary wars, and who form own network that is dense because the state is so small. Also, from my memories, MA was the bastion of liberty, with many churches being of Unitarian type, etc, etc. It doesn’t mean that there are no deeply conservative roots in the state; they are just a minority. An old boys’ mentality might well exist; it is just not pervasive.

The Stoughton police department has long had an absolutely horrible reputation. At least four cops had sex with her, including the animal control officer who traded her a kitten for sex in his office. I can't even...

Massachusetts may have a storied history with great universities and medical facilities but bad stuff happens everywhere.

I really hope the feds are looking closely at this one. The silence has been deafening.