You are in no way too personal or being offensive.
Someone told me, about 15 years ago, that my father was the one who killed Elizabeth. He was convinced, after hearing my story. This man was not a psychic or very intuitive at all, I think. He was just a person who listened carefully and then shared his ideas.
At that time I said nothing about the purse because I did not think about that until just a few days ago! See how talking about all this and re-living it helps the case? Painful, but very, very necessary.
When this person told me that, I was totally shocked. He did not even know my father because my dad was already deceased. I totally recoiled from his statement. No daughter wants to believe that her father could be a murderer - and of his own daughter!
As the years have gone by, however, I never forgot what he said. And I have wondered if it could have been true. I do know that when I was at my father's bedside, when he was dying, I told him that "all was forgiven." He died about three days after that. At the time, I had no way of knowing what I could be forgiving - hmmm...
My mother is sneaky and she lies. I know that some lies are told by parents because they think they are acting in the best interest of their children. I've caught her in so many lies over the years, most harmless but some really hurt me. I think that it could be completely true - COMPLETELY TRUE - that my mother could be covering up for something that my father did, or that they both did, years ago.
Since I found out that my mother was not cooperating with Gay Dickerson, I have not spoken to her. I cannot bring myself to interact with a woman who ignores her own child - and the people working so hard to find out what happened to that child.
I know grief is hard - I have not talked about my sister, openly, in years!
I also know that sometimes we tell white lies, as I did, saying I was an only child so people would not pry.
But to act so indignant, as if Gay Dickerson was an intrusion in my mother's life - when it was about her own child...WTF? (pardon, for emphasis only)
I mean, she could have said, "This is too hard for me, but I am glad Gay is still investigating." Or, "Laura, I can't handle these phone calls - can you take the pressure off me and help out?"
That is why, in the beginning, I felt sorry for my parents (and my mother, especially). I took everything handed to me and tried to be strong and fight the system and deal with the investigators - EVERYTHING - even though I was newly married, had a young child, and problems of my own.
I don't feel sorry for anyone now - except my sister.
Something I recall now...my father's birthday...April 26, 1986. We were up at the ranch in the Lake Buchanan area. My mother, dad, husband and child. We were at the dinner table and celebrating my father's birthday. He suddenly got up and went outside to smoke. He was crying.
Elizabeth had been missing since Saturday, April 12, 1986. The last we saw her was Friday, April 11, 1986. So that means my parents would have reported her missing...and that is only two weeks.
I asked my mother why my father was crying (no lie, this is one of five times I ever saw him cry in my life) and she said it was because of Elizabeth.
???
The police records really do need to be re-hashed to see if this is after she was reported missing. I recall it being a longer time, but perhaps I am wrong?
But isn't over a week a long time to report that your child did not come home?
Or even one day? I've got three adult children and I ask that they be blessed and be okay ALL the time...I worry about them commuting around, traveling - the normal things a mother does. I know they are in God's hands but they still are my children!
My parents and Elizabeth had a volatile relationship because Elizabeth was a pain. She was terribly alcoholic, using drugs, helpless and unable to take care of herself. She loved children and worked (sometimes) in local daycares but was unable to hold a job because of her drinking. She was a high school dropout, had maybe a 10th grade education, and had learning disabilities that my mother never addressed when she was younger. Katy Elementary School, way back when, wanted my sister put on medication and in special classes to aid her learning disabilities. My mother refused, because first of all, she was the authority and knew Elizabeth best and secondly, what would the neighbors think?
This attitude was prevalent when my parents were building their retirement home - what to do with Elizabeth? They had asked if she could just come live with me...they had left her in jail when she got a DUI so they could go on a vacation and Elizabeth not get into more trouble. They had been told, when Elizabeth was 18, by a psychiatrist, that Elizabeth needed to be committed to an institution but my parents would not do that because "the family would find out" and what would they say then?
So, they did not know what to do with her. She was spending more time in jail (for DWI's and DUI's in Harris County), she had mental problems and basically had to be watched, constantly. She was unemployable and yes, a pain. She would stay up all night, drinking and sleep all day. She had an eating disorder. She would easily fight you or become unhinged if the alcohol was taken away. She was probably in the end stages of her disease...how much longer could she have lasted like that? She was very hard to live with and I know she caused my parents MUCH distress because they were always worried about her. The central theme was, "What will we do with Elizabeth when we move?"
But despite that, she was a human being and deserved so much more!!! I always knew that, and was totally dismayed when my parents would not seek help for her.
My parents told me that they adopted Elizabeth because they thought I would "become too spoiled if left as an only child." We both were adopted, at birth. My mother can conceive but not carry a child to term. She had four miscarriages prior to my birth, and my father said that he had to get her a baby because "she was ready for the nut house."
Nice, huh?
No, I have FEW details about my adoption, only the stories my mother told me, reluctantly, over the years.
My story is happier than my sister's however. My mother always blamed Elizabeth's birth mother for Elizabeth's physical and mental problems. "She was a 14-16 year old, unmarried girl in the wards of Houston. We think she was Italian. She evidently was an alcoholic and from a bad family."
Any more suggestions? How do we get my mother to talk? How do we relocate all the old witnesses and have them re-interviewed?
Laura
