I get uncomfortable with the talk about how Mollie must have went willingly because if it was a stranger she "would have put up a fight." If someone is pointing a gun at you, it's a completely reasonable response to go along with them to avoid getting shot. Particularly if you are a very intelligent person but also a small person, you may think you have a better chance to survive if you try to talk your way out of a situation or reason your way out than fight someone with a weapon.
We may disagree about what we would have done, or what the ideal person thinking clearly should do, but it's not unreasonable. It's not a sign of weakness if you don't put up an evidence-leaving fight. Elizabeth Smart was stolen silently from her house yet she had the incredible strength to survive for months. I hate the tendency to paint victims as "good" or "bad" based on what some expert thinks the ideal rational person with full knowledge of the situation "should have" done.
As I've said on these threads for weeks now, I think she was abducted. Whoever did this had the element of shock & surprise in their favor; never underestimate the
upper hand that gives an 'opponent', if you want to put it that way. You might think you're ready if faced with a predator right in front of you grabbing at you, set on doing you in. Who has your arm & you can't shake him.
And you might be, through luck of the draw, witness intervention, or maybe getting the right kick in, or your weapon out fast & that spooked him off. Your screams. There's only so much preplanning you can do for a scenario with a predator intent on making this your last day at his whim. "She should have..." gets real fast into victim blaming. We aren't here for that. Nor are we- I- here to be defeatist about an abduction scenario. Take self-defense, etc. We all know these things. I thought I'd act fast & know what to do. I did. I did think this.
A few years back, I was in my apt. listening to music with my headphones on. Was sitting at the top of my stairs. The cat acted weird then I thought I heard some inside noise. Took headphones off, & BOOM, just like that, a man appeared on the ground floor looking up at me. Just stood there looking at me, stock still. Never seen this guy in my life. You wanna know what I did? After those 10,000 dateline videos, after writing & researching extensively about missing & abducted people over the years, after those self-defense classes? After all my self-talk & awareness how I would *never again* be pleasant to a stranger trying to get me into his car?
That's right. I froze. I knew none of the rooms upstairs had a lock on 'em. I knew I had no weapons upstairs. My mind kept going in circles= no lock, no weapon, do I have a knife at least up here, on & on, & while I stared at him &
could not move, my whole body a block of frozen fear. I literally didn't feel in control of my brain in that moment.
lockweaponlockweapon. I yelled something like
Who the *** are you as aggressively as I could get out my mouth.
I hadn't been out in days; missed the monthly exterminator visit notice taped to my door.
That taught me a lot. I can't know how I will be in
that moment -
and all it takes is a moment- of absolute surprise, fear, panic.
Sure, I can
plan. But it's the shock of it. It's really, well, shocking. "I'm in shock. That's fine. But now I need to think" would have been better.
I say this as a normally level-headed, handle- crises- well woman (so I'm told), but man did that throw me for a loop. Generally, now I have an edc (everyday carry) Sog knife clipped to pants at all times (lots of fun at parties!). Tricky if you have to walk in government offices, etc., the laws to know about.
Anyway, if this post helps one woman on this board in any way, I'm happy. Mollie, let's bring her home.
EDIT: also got my Iowa state gun permit. haven't bought a gun yet.
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