I never anticipated, after being disappointed day after day, that this afternoon would be the day for this smoking evidence!
I think that initially in BC's mind, when he offered for NC to take the kids to Canada, he was thinking she would be with her family, they would support her, and he would just move on. Perhaps in his mind, by just letting her go, and having the kids free and clear, he didn't expect to be hit with that separation agreement. And when he was, the plan changed, because in his mind, she was ungrateful. After all, she had a loving and supportive family to help her. They could help her pay an attorney, but he had no money for one. (his check, a credit card check even, bounced IIRC) And it doesn't seem he had the kind of relationship with his family where he could ask for money for a divorce.)
I think in April was when the budget nazi and father of the year emerged. I mentioned last night, I think, that I thought it was odd that his parenting journal, which is normal in custody issues, stopped in May. NC even mentioned she was staying so the green card process could move ahead. I think temporarily, his thought was to fight her because he was so angry.
But when he realized, end of May, that this was not going to be a quick solution, and we know things were not happy in that house, his plans changed. He had the week before vacation to work out a plan, and I think he knew all along that he would do it on that Friday evening, knowing a party was happening and she would likely stay out late.
Whatever happened on Wednesday night when they came home from JA's house scared NC, and she called the realtor asap...she knew in her gut something had changed, and I so wish she had just had a little more time.