CA CA - Hannah, 16, Devonte, 15, & Sierra Hart, 12, Mendocino County, 26 March 2018 #3

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Speculating on how the "free hugs" sign came about:

I have a feeling that the "free hugs" sign originated in Devonte's habit of being inappropriately affectionate. I wonder if they maybe started doing it as a way of alerting people that their kid was prone to "giving hugs" to people they encountered out in public.

It might have been a way they were trying to channel his tendency into something a bit more controlled. They might have thought that it was cute or endearing for people to see a little kid with this sign around his neck when he came running over to strangers, rather than having to explain why he was doing it (due to history of abuse). They also might have tried to use it to help him learn to manage the behavior - turning it into a positive thing - telling him you can give "free hugs" - rather than just having him run up to anyone he encountered and grabbing on to them.

As he got older, the use of the "free hugs" sign morphed into something where he may have felt pressured to act in ways that maybe he was beginning to grow out of. The parents then also managed to find a way to channel this "free hugs" thing into their political activism and their need to maintain a certain persona on social media. So it took on a life of its own, and maybe Devonte was struggling with that, which would be normal for a teenager to start doing.

Since we don't know if they ever got any therapy for these kids, its hard to know if they were ever given any guidance about how to manage inappropriate affection due to attachment problems. I can almost imagine caregivers trying to deal with this type of behavior who have no guidance and doing something like a "free hugs" sign on the child's neck in public.

just some speculation....

And what about the free hugs project by ken nwadike?


IMO
 
Speculating on how the "free hugs" sign came about:

I have a feeling that the "free hugs" sign originated in Devonte's habit of being inappropriately affectionate. I wonder if they maybe started doing it as a way of alerting people that their kid was prone to "giving hugs" to people they encountered out in public.

It might have been a way they were trying to channel his tendency into something a bit more controlled. They might have thought that it was cute or endearing for people to see a little kid with this sign around his neck when he came running over to strangers, rather than having to explain why he was doing it (due to history of abuse). They also might have tried to use it to help him learn to manage the behavior - turning it into a positive thing - telling him you can give "free hugs" - rather than just having him run up to anyone he encountered and grabbing on to them.

As he got older, the use of the "free hugs" sign morphed into something where he may have felt pressured to act in ways that maybe he was beginning to grow out of. The parents then also managed to find a way to channel this "free hugs" thing into their political activism and their need to maintain a certain persona on social media. So it took on a life of its own, and maybe Devonte was struggling with that, which would be normal for a teenager to start doing.

Since we don't know if they ever got any therapy for these kids, its hard to know if they were ever given any guidance about how to manage inappropriate affection due to attachment problems. I can almost imagine caregivers trying to deal with this type of behavior who have no guidance and doing something like a "free hugs" sign on the child's neck in public.

just some speculation....

I think you might very well be right about this.
I am a children magnet, and that is fine, I love kids.
But I have had some kids who are absolute strangers b-line towards me and cling to me, and that is uncomfortable, it is odd. Gets too much.
And it doesn´t take a super sleuth to see that there are some issues.

It is normal that children are a little bit reserved right when you meet them. They don´t take long to thaw, but a little distance at first - and not physical contact with kids you don´t know too well, at least after toddler stage.
 
And what about the free hugs project by ken nwadike?


IMO

What do you mean?

If you're saying that that could be a factor in Devonte's "free hugs" sign.. I think its possible.

But I tend to believe that the reason Devonte is seen wearing this sign when he is older originated in his earlier behavior. It would be odd to take a "free hugs" sign and put it on a child who is very shy and introverted. It would make more sense to put such a sign (regardless of how inappropriate/wrong that decision is) on a child who has shown a pattern of being overly friendly/affectionate with strangers.

I don't think these women were sadistic to these children from the moment they adopted them. So that is why I am wondering about the origins of the "free hugs" sign. I do believe that the motivation behind the sign morphed as the years went on, and came to be used for different reasons than it probably originally did.

All just speculation, of course.
 
There is a strong movement in that direction now so it may be something to look into as your kids will be facing it a lot

There is no strong movement in that direction. As long as the amount of black children in the foster pipeline, greatly outnumbers the amount of potential black adoptive parents willing to adopt them, there will not be a strong movement to prevent whites from adopting them. NOR SHOULD THERE BE.
 
CPS shows up in a county car. it is a regular car (usually nowadays a prius or ford fusion hybrid) that has a small emblem on the door. here anyways. I know because one of the kids at my sons daycare was in his gma custody, and CPS picked him up weekly from daycare to take him to supervised visitation w his parents. :(
I know in at least parts of Oregon, kids are, surprisingly, transported by volunteer drivers. Seriously. They are very well screened and checked, but yeah, they may get some reimbursement of some kind, but they are not actual CPS or DHS employees.

Imagine my feelings the first time I watched an abused kid leave my classroom in the car alone with an elderly gentleman volunteer. Yes, I had confirmed it all first, because really, Oregon?

But it's their standard practice... From my experience, it's usually retired people.
 
Very interesting question. To my knowledge, parents have to sign release forms for their children's photos and names to be published. Hmmm.....

Wow! They printed his name. Do newspapers have to get permission from parents before they print the name of a kid?
 
There is no strong movement in that direction. As long as the amount of black children in the foster pipeline, greatly outnumbers the amount of potential black adoptive parents willing to adopt them, there will not be a strong movement to prevent whites from adopting them. NOR SHOULD THERE BE.

I don't think we should efforts should be placed on follow up support services, assessments and outreach rather than trying to limit who can adopt who. In many articles people are commenting that the system failed the hart children and that is true! They were responsible for allowing the adoption and their should be due diligence across systems to ensure that they are in good care when no one is watching


IMO
 
Ah...sorry, I did misinterpret it. I'll go back and delete my post.

ETA...I guess I can't delete it. I reacted because my eldest daughter said the kids at school were talking about the case and there was some discussion about white parents not being allowed to adopt black kids...it upset her, but she's a strong kiddo. This was my knee jerk reaction...apologies.
No problem, I was just sorry that you have to have this stress on you! All the prejudice, probably from many sides.
Of course white mothers love their children, adopted or not!!
I hear you, totally.
 
My first thought was stunted growth from malnutrition, just like the other malnourished kids we've seen in the news lately. The facial bones look their age but their bodies don't match.

I've done some reading on this stunted growth and big head as we had a family friend with this. Medical researchers

say this is another symptom of an 'alcoholic pregnant mother'. It somehow stunts the growth hormones.
 
Very interesting question. To my knowledge, parents have to sign release forms for their children's photos and names to be published. Hmmm.....

Pictures of the parents and other siblings (along with their names) were included in some of the articles so I'm sure they gave their permission.
 
What do you mean?

If you're saying that that could be a factor in Devonte's "free hugs" sign.. I think its possible.

But I tend to believe that the reason Devonte is seen wearing this sign when he is older originated in his earlier behavior. It would be odd to take a "free hugs" sign and put it on a child who is very shy and introverted. It would make more sense to put such a sign (regardless of how inappropriate/wrong that decision is) on a child who has shown a pattern of being overly friendly/affectionate with strangers.

I don't think these women were sadistic to these children from the moment they adopted them. So that is why I am wondering about the origins of the "free hugs" sign. I do believe that the motivation behind the sign morphed as the years went on, and came to be used for different reasons than it probably originally did.

All just speculation, of course.

https://www.facebook.com/search/top/?q=free hugs devonte hart


IMO
 

He reached out to Devonte who said he knew about his work and was inspired by the work that he did. He said he had school and things so our schedule didn't line up. [emoji849] he said he got an email from Jen hart who said its prob not a good idea that he meet because she prefers that her kids live a private life...and he says news outlets reached out and she wasn't allowing him to do any public appearances... and he said she just wanted him to be a kid [emoji849][emoji849] he said he understood and left it alone.


IMO
 
There is no strong movement in that direction. As long as the amount of black children in the foster pipeline, greatly outnumbers the amount of potential black adoptive parents willing to adopt them, there will not be a strong movement to prevent whites from adopting them. NOR SHOULD THERE BE.

Instead of derailing the tread with lots of info, I recommend a google search to see all of the issues with “white saviors” , the appropriation of black amd other cultures, the queens and kings, the new Jim Crow, and lots of topics I am forgetting.
 
From 2015:
Portland hug photo: How one family survived the media storm

If you asked the Hart family, it was overwhelming. Jennifer Hart, Devonte's mom, spoke to The Oregonian Friday about the "unexpected" experience. It was the first time anyone in the family has talked to the media about the incident.

The 12-year-old was frustrated by the situation, Hart said, and so was she. A photograph taken by a stranger without his approval had changed his life. The photograph, the media attention, the threats -- it was all out of their control.

The family backed away from civic events -- a regular occurrence before The Photo -- but came to miss them

So on Friday, a slightly timid Hart accompanied her children to the Portland rally where Devonte stood, seemingly unafraid, in front of hundreds.

"It's healing because I let all the attention bring me down," Hart said.

"Doing nothing solves nothing," she said. "We've always been active. I didn't want one moment, good or bad, to alter that for us."
 
While I get your point and don't disagree on the whole, the part I bolded makes it sound like Devonte was responsible for not taking action. There's no way any of those kids, or the neighbors, could know these two nutcase women would unravel and kill them all. This is all on those two women, and the children and neighbors are victims of the insanity and evilness.

I would never mean it that way! What I meant was more like I wish he could have got out or got the attention of the CPS people somehow...and what is Jen doing to control these kids even when they're scared to the point of running to the neighbor for help. I was wondering if the kids had had the "they'll want to take you away from us and split you all up" thing from Jen. Or had there been a fight over the desire for outside help and Devonte got hurt? These are the things I'm asking in my head...not putting responsibility on him, just trying to understand what might have happened and feeling so frustrated and sad that they were so close to getting help they needed and deserved. I would never mean it that way. And that's why I figured the kids, if they went on the trip, wouldn't run away once they were driving...because they wouldn't have any concept of the risk of someone doing something like this!

I'm sorry, I didn't mean it to be taken that way.
 
He reached out to Devonte who said he knew about his work and was inspired by the work that he did. He said he had school and things so our schedule didn't line up. [emoji849] he said he got an email from Jen hart who said its prob not a good idea that he meet because she prefers that her kids live a private life...and he says news outlets reached out and she wasn't allowing him to do any public appearances... and he said she just wanted him to be a kid [emoji849][emoji849] he said he understood and left it alone.


IMO

Can you all access the video?


IMO
 
He reached out to Devonte who said he knew about his work and was inspired by the work that he did. He said he had school and things so our schedule didn't line up. [emoji849] he said he got an email from Jen hart who said its prob not a good idea that he meet because she prefers that her kids live a private life...and he says news outlets reached out and she wasn't allowing him to do any public appearances... and he said she just wanted him to be a kid [emoji849][emoji849] he said he understood and left it alone.


IMO

And he was friends with Jen hart on Facebook so a large part of the video he talks about how people put on facades and to be comfortable asking for help.


IMO
 
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