Cox Family Press Conference - 15 Feb 2010

[My6]

Now we're heading into speculation again. I'm just thinking out loud. I can only assume she wanted her marriage to work; she was willing to go to great lengths to support it (no matter how subtlely abusive it was).

If you were a friend of someone in that situation, seriously, what would you do? You'd talk to her, of course. Maybe make some recommendations. We know some of her friends did, at least, talk to her about it. Tim Peterson suggested she leave. What else?

Really - where is the cut off point that the friend must call the police or step in some other significantly strong way? Could the friends truly be held responsible? Sorry... I just don't see it...:twocents:

Even if you are a family member and call the police and every agency out there with fact and evidence. They will do NOTHING for you except tell you to tell the family member (women) that she needs to come forward.

The family's hands are tied until that happens and getting the woman to do that safely feels next to impossible in a controlling environment because many times the women has been threatened that her family will be hurt if she leaves as well..

Add to this the fact that many are being watched so closely, have no keys etc etc.. Not internet.. the list goes on...

I think she was afraid and didn't have a way out and when she finally tried, look what happened. We need to find a way for LE to intervene before it gets to that point and protect the women...

And yes it is all bolded for a reason!

:furious:

 

[fran]

Part of me wonders if that's because she was embarrassed and ashamed. Poor, poor Susan. Even in divorce, he never would have let her go free. It would have been a lifetime of mental torture using the children as pawns.

If IIRC, Josh's parents divorce and going back and forth in court went on for at least 10 years. I believe it didn't stop until the mom and one sis moved to Utah.

It kinda' runs in the family which was why Susan was AFRAID Josh might kidnap the boys and run.

JMHO
fran

 

[5CentsWorth]

Can anyone think of reason why Tim Peterson would not give her a ride? They worked in the same building---I thought? Maybe not, only worked for the same company.

Maybe Josh was jealous of Tim and wouldn't have stood for another man taking his wife to work and also Josh probably got some sick satisfaction from her riding a bike to work. It probably gave him a feeling of control.

JMO

 

[hollyblue]

Snipped:

Add to this the fact that many are being watched so closely, have no keys etc etc.. Not internet.. the list goes on...


You know, I would not put it past Josh to have rigged some sort of listening device, etc..... so he could know what she was saying. She may have had a *usual* place where she talked on the phone to family and friends, and he planted it there. They are easy to get nowdays and much more sophisticated. Being as controlling as he was, I wouldn't put it passed him....or the thought coming from his dad.
JMO

 

[Gin]

Snipped:

Add to this the fact that many are being watched so closely, have no keys etc etc.. Not internet.. the list goes on...


You know, I would not put it past Josh to have rigged some sort of listening device, etc..... so he could know what she was saying. She may have had a *usual* place where she talked on the phone to family and friends, and he planted it there. They are easy to get nowdays and much more sophisticated. Being as controlling as he was, I wouldn't put it passed him....or the thought coming from his dad.
JMO

Frankly, I've sort of wondered about the possibility that J would consider placing something like this in the home of one of his SLC neighborhood friends. He and Daddy could really gain some information.
While everyone is "watching" to make sure he doesn't log on to the wrong computer, maybe there are other reasons for J to stop by and visit.

 

[My6]

Snipped:


Frankly, I've sort of wondered about the possibility that J would consider placing something like this in the home of one of his SLC neighborhood friends. He and Daddy could really gain some information.
While everyone is "watching" to make sure he doesn't log on to the wrong computer, maybe there are other reasons for J to stop by and visit.

I totally agree with you on this!! I also bet he had them on Susan too... :furious::furious::furious::furious:

 

[PickieChickie]

That maybe true, but I cant help but to think that her so called friends werent all that great. I may get a tomato too, but I almost on the verge of calling some of her friends out on this. Someone had to have known she was riding a bike to work or how miserable she was. A lot of time people don't want to face it. They don't want reality. They want their perfect little world to stay intact at any cost. I've known so called stepford friends like this. I run from those types. The smile at all cost friends who look down on anyone that has real problems and don't try to hide or bury.

I guess what i'm saying is sometimes family/friends dont wanna know the truth they are happy with the fiction. Just sad. I really felt Susan was bullied, but not this bad. I wouldnt even put it past JP to smack her around a bit every know and then. That poor woman, those poor kids.

Why is it Susan Powell didn't feel she could confide in Shelby Gifford who is a domestic violence counselor? It is very clear the family and friends have been hiding details about what was really going on in the Powell marriage but for what purpose? And, what aren't they telling now?

In the beginning, they claimed there was no physical abuse and now they state there was. How long have they known about this? Surely, within days, the family member who Susan told about the physical altercation shared what they knew with the Cox's.

What else are they not telling?

As far as Susan riding a bike to work goes, why didn't she buy a "throw away car"? A husband can only have as much power as the wife allows him to have. Also, I have to wonder how many times she actually rode a bike to work. Surely a coworker would have picked her up and brought her home. I really don't believe she was forced to ride a bike to work every day the entire time she worked, but that this was a form of punishment Josh handed out when he wanted to tick Susan off.

 

[burbqueen]

Now we're heading into speculation again. I'm just thinking out loud. I can only assume she wanted her marriage to work; she was willing to go to great lengths to support it (no matter how subtlely abusive it was).

If you were a friend of someone in that situation, seriously, what would you do? You'd talk to her, of course. Maybe make some recommendations. We know some of her friends did, at least, talk to her about it. Tim Peterson suggested she leave. What else?

Really - where is the cut off point that the friend must call the police or step in some other significantly strong way? Could the friends truly be held responsible? Sorry... I just don't see it...:twocents:

I'm not saying its the friends fault, but for the friends to go to the press and act like nothing was wrong in their marriage. For the friends to help JP like they have cause they are scared to judge him or whatever. For the friends to even speak to that man is a slap in the face IMO.

Yes, they couldnt have forced Susan to leave, it would have been all up to her. Yes, she probably wanted her marriage to work for whatever god forsaken reason that I will never ever understand, but for the friends who lived near her, worked with her and went to church with her to stand by and act like they are scared of JP doesnt sit right with me in any way at all.:furious:

IMO, they wanted Susan to be o.k. so they wouldnt have to deal with it. Yeah throw your tomato's!lol. But I cant understand and never will. Not me, not my friend. I was engaged to a mental abuser and my friends stopped talking to me as long as I stayed with him. I needed tough love.

They supported me and if I came up missing I know for a fact they wouldnt be at my funeral hugging on the guy or offering to help him in anyway. They would stand by me to the end and not waffle and hide behind trying to be a good Christian or working to get info from him. Where is the loyalty?

 

[PickieChickie]

I'm not saying its the friends fault, but for the friends to go to the press and act like nothing was wrong in their marriage. For the friends to help JP like they have cause they are scared to judge him or whatever. For the friends to even speak to that man is a slap in the face IMO.

Yes, they couldnt have forced Susan to leave, it would have been all up to her. Yes, she probably wanted her marriage to work for whatever god forsaken reason that I will never ever understand, but for the friends who lived near her, worked with her and went to church with her to stand by and act like they are scared of JP doesnt sit right with me in any way at all.:furious:

IMO, they wanted Susan to be o.k. so they wouldnt have to deal with it. Yeah throw your tomato's!lol. But I cant understand and never will. Not me, not my friend. I was engaged to a mental abuser and my friends stopped talking to me as long as I stayed with him. I needed tough love.

They supported me and if I came up missing I know for a fact they wouldnt be at my funeral hugging on the guy or offering to help him in anyway. They would stand by me to the end and not waffle and hide behind trying to be a good Christian or working to get info from him. Where is the loyalty?

Susan did confide in Tim Peterson and when he told her to leave Josh, Tim reports that Susan refused to discuss her marriage with Tim after that.

Susan's other friends and family members may have suggested she leave Josh and were met with the same response.

I have had friends who have confided in me about what their husbands are doing and when I've suggested they leave, suddenly they withdraw. I had one friend whose husband was abusing her to the point that he shoved her while they were out in the garage and she hit her temple on the corner of the work bench. I had to take her to the hospital twice and both times she claimed it was an accident when in fact it was not. (She later told me the truth.)

Her husband also punched her in the head so hard she was having a migraine and passing out and I had to take her to the hospital then too. She lied and said she hit her head on the car hatch door.

These women will lie and lie to cover up for their husbands because they are too afraid to leave them. I don't know how far JP was taking the domestic violence. But I'll bet you he abused her on a constant basis and she just wasn't telling anyone because it is obvious she didn't want people telling her to leave her husband!

Nothing is more annoying than a friend who keeps complaining and complaining and complaining about how violent and emotionally abusive their spouse is yet they refuse to leave. It can be really draining to be a friend to a woman who refuses to leave but continually is badmouthing their husband and putting their children through hell. This friend's children were terrified of the husband!

Yes, I did call the cops and the friend was told by law enforcement and social workers if she allowed the husband back in the house all the children would get taken away! So, they sold their house and moved to another town so they could be together!

 

[LogicalMinds]

Sad but no surprise...

I think that her friends and family have waited a long while to speak out, and even now are still as someone said "pussyfooting"

Meanwhile the 2 boys are with this sadistic, controlling, violent man

That is what really scares me....what is he and his family doing to/with those poor boys??

 

[Fairy1]

I haven't posted here for awhile, but these new revelations just make me so angry I could SPIT!!!

When it was reported early on that Susan's parents had given her a cell phone, I just knew there was a serious reason. I wish she would have sought more meaningful help from someone!!! I'm sure she was terrified of attempting to get out with her babies. I understand that. But I really wonder if she was counseled to stay and try to work it out. Now she's gone and those beautiful little boys are with that stupid, drooling, murderer. No doubt he's told them their "mean" mommy left them and Lord knows what else.

I sincerely hope LE is closing in. They arrested that Jesse Crow in CA today for the murder of his wife and she has yet to be found. WHAT ARE THEY WAITING FOR?????

 

[RubyRed]

I haven't posted here for awhile, but these new revelations just make me so angry I could SPIT!!!

When it was reported early on that Susan's parents had given her a cell phone, I just knew there was a serious reason. I wish she would have sought more meaningful help from someone!!! I'm sure she was terrified of attempting to get out with her babies. I understand that. But I really wonder if she was counseled to stay and try to work it out. Now she's gone and those beautiful little boys are with that stupid, drooling, murderer. No doubt he's told them their "mean" mommy left them and Lord knows what else.

I sincerely hope LE is closing in. They arrested that Jesse Crow in CA today for the murder of his wife and she has yet to be found. WHAT ARE THEY WAITING FOR?????

I wondered about that as well. I heard about the Ca. case , I'm wondering if LE in WVC do not have the forensics we were hoping for.

 

[Fairy1]

I wondered about that as well. I heard about the Ca. case , I'm wondering if LE in WVC do not have the forensics we were hoping for.

That's what worries me! Or maybe they just feel they need to find Susan...

 

[LogicalMinds]

I am probably going to get tomatoes thrown at me, but I do not agree with every family having a lost or missing family member starting a foundation.

I certainly do not begrudge Susan's family having hope that she may be found alive. If it were my family member, I would never give up hope that he/she would be found. It really would take LE recovering a body for me to accept it. As it is not my family member, I can state that I do not believe that Susan is alive.

I am glad to see Susan's family acknowledge Josh's abuse in the press conference. I hope Josh watches the press conference and hears those words. He will be angry, IMO, because people are speaking badly of him. Well, too bad, Josh. Susan's family would not lie about you, and if they know this much, there is most likely so much more they do not know of.

Susan and her family are in my prayers.

Great point... a lot of the "foundations" that these families start don't really get off the ground there is a LOT of work and red tape and also it kind of duplicates other efforts

some do stick it out and become really viable and beneficial....KlaasKids for one

but many of them just start up and fizzle out

until there is some resolution here I don't see how the "family" can even focus on a foundation yet anyhow

In the years to come, after Susan is found and justice served for her, maybe then they could think about a "foundation"

 

[LaLaw2000]

Why not just join an existing foundation like Klaas Kids? Join forces. There is power in numbers!

 

[Fairy1]

It appears people are thinking the same way as I am but I hesitate to express myself on this matter due to being viewed as negative or offensive. Maybe someone else will come out and say what I'm feeling.

You're amongst friends here! What's on your mind?

 

[Fairy1]

OK! I will say it! Why is the reward for information leading to the location of Susan or an arrest resulting in a conviction only worth $11,000.00 to the friends and family of Susan Powell?

Why is it they want people to donate money to their foundation so they get paid for providing services to other people?

Why isn't their main focus increasing the reward so that one person who JP confided in will talk!

Asking people to PLEDGE money to a reward fund which is managed by an entity set up to manage it where it is not available for these people to dip into and use however they feel is appropriate seems to make more sense to me.

The "donate money to us" so we can help people isn't my idea of a wise move! They want the money to go to them so they can use it how they want to!

Why not have people donate money to other nonprofit organizations in Susan's name?

AND WHAT ABOUT THE PATHETIC REWARD AMOUNT!? :banghead::banghead::banghead::banghead::banghead::banghead:

Yes Ma'am! Don't you feel better now?

Not sure the murderer confided in anyone who will talk (daddy). But at the very least, the $$$ should go toward FINDING SUSAN!

 

[grayjay]

I want to go find her. And it's not about a reward.

She could be in a hole which was dug in advance and very carefully covered over in a short time. She could be in an abandoned mine shaft. She isn't likely to be just dumped under a tree somewhere, although of course that's possible. As the weather warms, people can watch for carrion birds and see if there's any sign of a carcass above ground.

But a reward and a big search make no sense if she's in a toxic waste dump, which is what a mine shaft often is. It's not a good idea to get people out looking in deadly closed off caves.

I think the Coxes know that finding her is too iffy to keep their own lives on hold, and this is their best hope at a way of using their skills for a good cause. I see the need that they see, very much so. I think this is a good move for them and they are smart to stay busy.

After a while, I guess it's bothering me that people are so quick to second guess LE, the church, and even the family. How is this different from blame the victim, anyway?

 

[southern_scout]

I think it's much easier to say that outside of an abusive relationship, though. Not all women are strong, not all women have dominant personalities. There are plenty of women in the world who have been raised from birth to be "good" and stoic and "obedient". She might have been afraid to accept a car, she obviously lived with someone who controlled her life, and most people who control other people do it through fear. They prey on their victims weaknesses. She might not have wanted to face his reaction at home if she had gone out and bought a car, or changed the pin number, or fought over the car keys. And who knows, she may have finally stood up to him, and this is the result.

 

[Fairy1]

I want to go find her. And it's not about a reward.

She could be in a hole which was dug in advance and very carefully covered over in a short time. She could be in an abandoned mine shaft. She isn't likely to be just dumped under a tree somewhere, although of course that's possible. As the weather warms, people can watch for carrion birds and see if there's any sign of a carcass above ground.

But a reward and a big search make no sense if she's in a toxic waste dump, which is what a mine shaft often is. It's not a good idea to get people out looking in deadly closed off caves.

I think the Coxes know that finding her is too iffy to keep their own lives on hold, and this is their best hope at a way of using their skills for a good cause. I see the need that they see, very much so. I think this is a good move for them and they are smart to stay busy.

After a while, I guess it's bothering me that people are so quick to second guess LE, the church, and even the family. How is this different from blame the victim, anyway?

Seriously? Most likely, Susan is no longer with us and the folks left behind to speak and fight on her behalf don't seem to be stepping up in a meaningful way. Her babies are under the care of a suspected murderer and accomplice and it seems no one is inclined to remove them from that situation.

Really, blaming the victim? No. IMHO.