FL - Fendra Molme, 11 months, dies in hot car while parents attend church, Palm Bay, May 2023 *arrest*

[squareandrabbet]

That's a possibility. But I'd think if Dad was on the pulpit, the whole family would be sitting together at some point. Sure, the eldest child may take the youngest for a walk or something, but seems weird that mom never seemed to know where the baby was.

there’s some gaps in knowledge in here, to be certain.

 

[katydid23]

I’ve heard something as simple as when you are buckling the child in back.. take off & leave one of your shoes back there.

MOO

I have a GREAT system! Seriously...

I have a large hot pink teddy bear, about the size of an infant.

When I take the baby out of the car seat, I drop the teddy bear in the car seat. Or right next to it.

When I put the baby back in the seat, I immediately put the bear on the front passenger seat. [ I had to have 2 teddies because the babies usually wanted one nearby]

When you get to your destination, you have a hot pink teddy bear right next to you , as you pull in to park. It is impossible not to see it. If it's there, you know there is a baby in the car. I also have my purse in that seat so I am going to see the bear.

 

[katydid23]

I have a GREAT system! Seriously...

I have a large hot pink teddy bear, about the size of an infant.

When I take the baby out of the car seat, I drop the teddy bear in the car seat. Or right next to it.

When I put the baby back in the seat, I immediately put the bear on the front passenger seat. [ I had to have 2 teddies because the babies usually wanted one nearby]

When you get to your destination, you have a hot pink teddy bear right next to you , as you pull in to park. It is impossible not to see it. If it's there, you know there is a baby in the car. I also have my purse in that seat so I am going to see the bear.

These hot car deaths are so devastating and they keep happening.

I didn't do this with my babies because I never really worried about leaving them accidentally. I was a stay-at-home mom so I always was aware that my kids were in my car.

But becoming a grandma spurred me on to figure out a way to make sure I'd never forget accidentally. Hot car deaths were in the news and I knew it was unusual for me to have a child in the car, so I came up with my Hot Pink Teddy solution. lol

 

[Ozoner]

I wonder, do the caregivers in these cases frequently forget other things? Do they forget they started dinner, go down for a nap, only wake up when the smoke alarm goes off? Leave a child in the bathtub and get caught up in their favorite TV show? Have they ever left an older child at Walmart and didn't notice until they got home?

Or did they perhaps forget that a hot car will kill the child?

JMO

It's easy to forget things when you're focusing on something else. I have lost count of how many times I've started cooking something, walked outside to do so yardwork, and walked back in to find burned food and a house filled with smoke. I'm sure that's happened to me at least 100 times. As soon as I walk away from the stove I completely forget that I'm cooking.

 

[ChatteringBirds]

Maybe see what the parents have to say before passing any judgement.

It is possible a major miscommunication occured. Or perhaps one or both parents were so sleep-deprived they literally unintentionally forgot their new routine.

 

[OceanElix]

I'll never understand these cases of parents leaving their child in the car to die, never. No matter how sleep deprived or whatever other galling excuse, it's unacceptable.
In church for 3 hours?? Doing what?? Just appalling.
Poor little one, my heart breaks.

 

[katydid23]

It's easy to forget things when you're focusing on something else. I have lost count of how many times I've started cooking something, walked outside to do so yardwork, and walked back in to find burned food and a house filled with smoke. I'm sure that's happened to me at least 100 times. As soon as I walk away from the stove I completely forget that I'm cooking.

But you are not supposed to be 'focusing on something else' when you are caring for an 11 month old baby. You cannot walk outside and do yard work and forget your 11 month old is alone in the house, toddling around, unsupervised. That's how babies get seriously injured or worse.

You cannot forget your baby is in the car, strapped in her car seat for three hours, in Florida in May. That is a death sentence.

 

[katydid23]

Maybe see what the parents have to say before passing any judgement.

It is possible a major miscommunication occured. Or perhaps one or both parents were so sleep-deprived they literally unintentionally forgot their new routine.

After seeing so darn many babies dying, I am frustrated by it. All parents are aware of the horrid dangers of leaving a child in a hot car.

Sure, there might be some major miscommunication. It is just hard to understand because parents are totally 100% responsible for watching their toddlers, at all times. It is very hard to justify or explain why they got 3 other children out of the car and didn't notice their youngest was missing. I hope this is not going to be blamed on the older siblings--it is not their responsibility.

 

[BrownRice]

Hopefully one day all cars will have the sensors alerting drivers there is something left on their rear seats when they exit. My car is a 2019 and has it. Even if I leave a bunch of reusable shopping bags, I get an alert.

 

[Soulmagent]

How TH do you forget a child when going to worship? Do the parents have other children?

I watched Trica's channel the other day and insightful one mentioned this documentary on amazon prime called
Death of a child .
They have doctors talk about the reason people forget their children in the car,but I noticed that in 2 cases talked about ,the parent were at church . This case is the third in 2 days I heard happening at church.
Death of a Child (2017) - IMDb

 

[Soulmagent]

I have a GREAT system! Seriously...

I have a large hot pink teddy bear, about the size of an infant.

When I take the baby out of the car seat, I drop the teddy bear in the car seat. Or right next to it.

When I put the baby back in the seat, I immediately put the bear on the front passenger seat. [ I had to have 2 teddies because the babies usually wanted one nearby]

When you get to your destination, you have a hot pink teddy bear right next to you , as you pull in to park. It is impossible not to see it. If it's there, you know there is a baby in the car. I also have my purse in that seat so I am going to see the bear.

I always shove my stuff in the diaper bag and that stays in the front . I think technology is what will help stop this from happening. Smart bracelets for monitoring your baby and their vitals. connected to you phone with an app. or your smart watch.
I just feel heartbroken for the community because it is so so tragic and it is so much easier to blame the parents for careless behavior.
I forgot my baby ,my first ,in the car at the gas station . Thankfully it was 5 minutes ,she was 5 days old. She 33 now. I couldnt believe I forget a whole baby ,my baby . I cried and cried. it was one of the hottest moths of 1991.

 

[IceIce9]

I'll never understand these cases of parents leaving their child in the car to die, never. No matter how sleep deprived or whatever other galling excuse, it's unacceptable.
In church for 3 hours?? Doing what?? Just appalling.
Poor little one, my heart breaks.

My babies were the most important things in my life. I don’t understand that a parent would just strap a baby in a seat and never look at them again?

When my babes were in their car seats I would glance at them in the mirror when I was at a traffic light, in line at a drive thru, etc. Checking to see if they were sleeping, had the blanket fallen off? Could they reach their teddy bear?

I hear the public service announcements advising parents to put something “important” beside their baby in the car. Seriously, what could be more “important” than your baby?

But maybe that is just me. But I would never consider my phone or my hat or my shoe or my purse or my lunch or my donuts to be more “important” than my baby.

JMO YMMV

 

[Soulmagent]

I hear the public service announcements advising parents to put something “important” beside their baby in the car. Seriously, what could be more “important” than your baby?

I snipped this relevant to my response part for conversational purpose ,no offence .

Right?
Just wish I wasn't a person that did forget her baby in a car .Once for 5 minutes.

 

[BeachSky]

I snipped this relevant to my response part for conversational purpose ,no offence .

Right?
Just wish I wasn't a person that did forget her baby in a car .Once for 5 minutes.

 

[Rolypolyoly]

I snipped this relevant to my response part for conversational purpose ,no offence .

Right?
Just wish I wasn't a person that did forget her baby in a car .Once for 5 minutes.

5 minutes isn't the same, that's a momentary lapse which is understandable with a 5 week old and you're used to being alone, I would bet that if you had been home instead of at the gas station you would have remembered in those 5 minutes and run back to your car.
Do you believe that you would have forgotten for hours?. Please forgive yourself.

 

[Soulmagent]

5 minutes isn't the same, that's a momentary lapse which is understandable with a 5 week old and you're used to being alone, I would bet that if you had been home instead of at the gas station you would have remembered in those 5 minutes and run back to your car.
Do you believe that you would have forgotten for hours?. Please forgive yourself.

So I wish I could tell you ,ya no big deal . I cant ,I was reminded of my baby . Thankfully like I said I was only getting gas , a lady I knew who knew I just had my baby asked me'' Where the baby at today? ''
She has asked me 100's time since . She might have been a angel sent from god. Every time she asks me to this day I am overcome with gratefulness and relief. Its odd but means a lot to me ? IDK. Maybe I am just overly grateful to her so I place a high importance to her place in my life ? She probably has no idea of any of these feelings. She is just this lady I knew from the neighborhood who was a nice person and was all about a happy greeting and light conversion.

 

[Rolypolyoly]

So I wish I could tell you ,ya no big deal . I cant ,I was reminded of my baby . Thankfully like I said I was only getting gas , a lady I knew who knew I just had my baby asked me'' Where the baby at today? ''

You know, this post really points out what's wrong with this story though, doesn't it?. A lady you happened to bump into at the gas station for 5 minutes asked where your baby was, but a whole congregation of churchgoers, who are no doubt used to cooing all over an 11 month old baby, didn't ask "wheres the baby at today?"....

 

[Soulmagent]

You know, this post really points out what's wrong with this story though, doesn't it?. A lady you happened to bump into at the gas station for 5 minutes asked where your baby was, but a whole congregation of churchgoers, who are no doubt used to cooing all over an 11 month old baby, didn't ask "wheres the baby at today?"....

That is pretty deep. Wow. TY.

 

[ohemgee.kay925]

What could possibly be more important than their precious baby?

Answering my own question: their phone, cigarettes, or donuts.

In one of the first hot car baby deaths that I followed the mom went back to the car because she forgot to take donuts inside, and still didn’t remember the baby.

Exactly! I don't understand this at all!

Bless you for what you do. Seriously. I cannot imagine encountering that kind of situation. I was a vet tech previously and saw some things I will never forget, but this... a baby... the most precious gift... I'm really just at a loss for words.

 

[Soulmagent]

You know, this post really points out what's wrong with this story though, doesn't it?. A lady you happened to bump into at the gas station for 5 minutes asked where your baby was, but a whole congregation of churchgoers, who are no doubt used to cooing all over an 11 month old baby, didn't ask "wheres the baby at today?"....

I honestly think ,this is a post I will revisit.How do people in the epicenter of society,the ones you seek solace in,tell you we are protected in gods arms, have such an ambulance?