Considering you wished Suzie, Mum and friend dead I would hardly call that friendship materiel.
Of course you have grown up since then but it still doesn’t diminish you’re callous behavior.
I’ve posted something similar before but it got deleted. Maybe this time it will stay.
26 years ago I said something horrible. I can’t change that. I own it. Nobody forced me to say it. I have no excuse for saying it. But I’d like to explain why I said it and what led up to that point. What was going thru my mind at the time. Perhaps it will help clarify some things for those who can’t understand why.
I had been in that interrogation room for what seemed like forever. Detective Webb had been asking me the same questions over and over. Barely even bothering to switch up the way he asked the questions. Basically just, where were you that night? Who were you with? Do you know what happened to the women? Over and over with me giving the same answers again and again.
After what seemed like the millionth time of hearing the same old questions, frustration and exhaustion got the better of me. I leaned back in my chair and just kinda chuckled to myself at the absurdity of the whole situation.
Detective Webb saw that and lost it. He started yelling at me, poking me in the chest and asking if I thought this was some kind of joke?
Well, I had had enough also. Me being the cocky smart *advertiser censored* that I am, I yelled back. I rolled my eyes and made some sarcastic comment about how funny I thought it was being accused of kidnapping three women. The combination of frustration, anger and the overwhelming absurdity of it all (how could anyone think I would do anything like this?) had me pissed. I wanted him to be as pissed off as I was so I said something that I knew would get under his skin. I looked him in the eye and said “I hope the *advertiser censored* are dead.”
It was heat of the moment and it was aimed at pissing off detective Mark Webb. Directed ONLY at detective Mark Webb. Nobody else.
I knew it was a stupid thing to say. I knew how wrong it was while I was saying it. I didn’t care. I just wanted to piss him off.
Had I known 48 hours was behind the mirror filming and would later broadcast what I said on prime time television for the victims families, my own family, and the whole nation to hear, I probably wouldn’t have said it.
Hindsight, right?
But I did. And I can’t take it back. And here I am 26 years later, still catching hell for it.