OK OK - Stephen “Steve” Lee Murphy, last seen in Claremore sometime in 1976, not reported missing until July 2022

[Snoangel26]

Before having him declared dead, you need to consider the consequences to you. You could/would shut off his SS benefits, his pension if he has one, his bank accounts would be frozen causing his home to be foreclosed on, his job lost, his medical insurance and care gone, etc. There could/would be attorney's fees involved in getting this resolved. He could sue and expect you to pay to clean up the mess. Are you willing to possibly bankrupt both of you?

In all honesty I believe he is deceased already.

 

[EllaMinnowP]

In all honesty I believe he is deceased already.

I’ve been following along quietly. I don’t have any advice, but my heart goes out to you. I couldn’t decide whether to react “sad” about your belief that your father’s deceased, or just “like” your post for support. I wanted to clarify that I don’t “like” it, though, IYKWIM.

In my opinion, if you are going to find him and/or any truth about what happened to him, you’re going to have to take bold measures. It’s just an onlooker, but I fully support you starting the process of declaring him deceased, if you feel that’s your next logical step.
MOO
Keep your head up

 

[Sincerely]

@Snoangel26 I was thinking of creative ways to try and get more info on your dad so I plugged his name into the Find Lost Money database. His name is rather common but I did see two in OK and there is an address mentioned. Also, Camp Pendleton has a few addresses and one is in San Mateo and a Stephen Murphy has a lot of unclaimed money, paychecks, life insurance and so on from this area. I didn’t make it through the entire list so you’ll probably want to check them all. I know in the past, I claimed found money and I just had to type in my name, address, maybe dob, and phone number. It probably depends on who the funds are with but maybe you can get some info this way. Hope it helps.

MissingMoney.com | Search for Unclaimed Property

missingmoney.com

 

[EllaMinnowP]

Also, Camp Pendleton has a few addresses and one is in San Mateo and a Stephen Murphy has a lot of unclaimed money, paychecks, life insurance and so on from this area

RSBM

Wow! That sounds like a hot tip to me!
If not already looked into, I would definitely recommend that @Snoangel26 follow that lead.
Nice sleuthing work!

 

[Sincerely]

@Snoangel26 I was thinking of creative ways to try and get more info on your dad so I plugged his name into the Find Lost Money database. His name is rather common but I did see two in OK and there is an address mentioned. Also, Camp Pendleton has a few addresses and one is in San Mateo and a Stephen Murphy has a lot of unclaimed money, paychecks, life insurance and so on from this area. I didn’t make it through the entire list so you’ll probably want to check them all. I know in the past, I claimed found money and I just had to type in my name, address, maybe dob, and phone number. It probably depends on who the funds are with but maybe you can get some info this way. Hope it helps.

MissingMoney.com | Search for Unclaimed Property

missingmoney.com

@Snoangel26 Here is the California find lost money database and it does have more info than on the one that I previously linked. One of the San Mateo guys can be ruled out because his middle name starts with F and he could be the other San Mateo too just a different address. Oklahoma’s site expired apparently.

Unclaimed Property

ucpi.sco.ca.gov

 

[Snoangel26]

RSBM

Wow! That sounds like a hot tip to me!
If not already looked into, I would definitely recommend that @Snoangel26 follow that lead.
Nice sleuthing work!

I'm gonna go looking thru it. Thank you

 

[Snoangel26]

@Snoangel26 Here is the California find lost money database and it does have more info than on the one that I previously linked. One of the San Mateo guys can be ruled out because his middle name starts with F and he could be the other San Mateo too just a different address. Oklahoma’s site expired apparently.

Unclaimed Property

ucpi.sco.ca.gov

@Snoangel26 Here is the California find lost money database and it does have more info than on the one that I previously linked. One of the San Mateo guys can be ruled out because his middle name starts with F and he could be the other San Mateo too just a different address. Oklahoma’s site expired apparently.

Unclaimed Property

ucpi.sco.ca.gov

Thank you. I'll be looking.

 

[Stunned]

Before having him declared dead, you need to consider the consequences to you. You could/would shut off his SS benefits, his pension if he has one, his bank accounts would be frozen causing his home to be foreclosed on, his job lost, his medical insurance and care gone, etc. There could/would be attorney's fees involved in getting this resolved. He could sue and expect you to pay to clean up the mess. Are you willing to possibly bankrupt both of you?

Maybe put those questions to his family who refuse for some reason to help or acknowledge you first?

 

[RememberingRyan]

I suppose my question is what purpose it would serve to have him declared deceased? Would that purpose be functional or sentimental? If sentimental only, is that worth taking the risk that he is actually alive and could suffer significant complications for whatever other living family he might have by declaring him deceased? If you believe he has already passed and there is no function - such as acquiring assets - to declaring him dead then it seems unnecessary. If you are doing in the hope of forcing him out to be found, that contradicts the belief that he is deceased and would be unharmed by the act of declaring him.

 

[Stunned]

I suppose my question is what purpose it would serve to have him declared deceased? Would that purpose be functional or sentimental? If sentimental only, is that worth taking the risk that he is actually alive and could suffer significant complications for whatever other living family he might have by declaring him deceased? If you believe he has already passed and there is no function - such as acquiring assets - to declaring him dead then it seems unnecessary. If you are doing in the hope of forcing him out to be found, that contradicts the belief that he is deceased and would be unharmed by the act of declaring him.

Yeah, when put that way it makes sense. I just feel like his family has played games and I don’t like that! IMO

 

[megs1477]

Before having him declared dead, you need to consider the consequences to you. You could/would shut off his SS benefits, his pension if he has one, his bank accounts would be frozen causing his home to be foreclosed on, his job lost, his medical insurance and care gone, etc. There could/would be attorney's fees involved in getting this resolved. He could sue and expect you to pay to clean up the mess. Are you willing to possibly bankrupt both of you?

There is a check run with SSA before you can declare someone dead.
There has been no activity related to his SSN since his disappearance, so I believe all of those things you said are moot.
If he is alive, he is living under a false identity, so having him declared dead would have no impact on him.
It had already been determined that he is not alive and living under his own name, DOB, and SSN.

 

[megs1477]

I suppose my question is what purpose it would serve to have him declared deceased? Would that purpose be functional or sentimental? If sentimental only, is that worth taking the risk that he is actually alive and could suffer significant complications for whatever other living family he might have by declaring him deceased? If you believe he has already passed and there is no function - such as acquiring assets - to declaring him dead then it seems unnecessary. If you are doing in the hope of forcing him out to be found, that contradicts the belief that he is deceased and would be unharmed by the act of declaring him.

Having him declared deceased would allow access to his military records that we have not been able to obtain a copy of so far. It is obviously a last resort, but nearly all other options have been exhausted at this point.

 

[Snoangel26]

Maybe put those questions to his family who refuse for some reason to help or acknowledge you first?

He has 3 siblings left. One remembers him and the other 2 don't know him, as one was only a baby and the other wasn't born til 1979. One uncle that I'm not sure if is alive or not anymore

 

[RememberingRyan]

There is a check run with SSA before you can declare someone dead.
There has been no activity related to his SSN since his disappearance, so I believe all of those things you said are moot.
If he is alive, he is living under a false identity, so having him declared dead would have no impact on him.
It had already been determined that he is not alive and living under his own name, DOB, and SSN.

I apparently stopped getting notifications for this thread for a while, I did not realize that his SSN had finally been verified and confirmed to have no activity. I’ll have to go back and catch up on the thread.

 

[megs1477]

I apparently stopped getting notifications for this thread for a while, I did not realize that his SSN had finally been verified and confirmed to have no activity. I’ll have to go back and catch up on the thread.

Law enforcement has the number, but not family. The detective confirmed several months ago to me that there was no activity.

 

[OddOneOut]

Law enforcement has the number, but not family. The detective confirmed several months ago to me that there was no activity.

Did the detective say when the last activity was? Somehow, I missed seeing this.

 

[Snoangel26]

Maybe put those questions to his family who refuse for some reason to help or acknowledge you first?

He has 3 siblings left. One remembers him and the other 2 don't know him, as one was only a baby and the other wasn't born til 1979. One uncle that I'm not sure if is alive or not anymore

 

[OddOneOut]

Did the detective say when the last activity was? Somehow, I missed seeing this.

It is a shame the detective can't or won't tell where and when the SS number was last active. He is old enough to have applied for SS benefits. That he hasn't leans me toward thinking he is dead or hiding.

 

[Snoangel26]

It is a shame the detective can't or won't tell where and when the SS number was last active. He is old enough to have applied for SS benefits. That he hasn't leans me toward thinking he is dead or hiding.

I sent an email to the detective and asked what the last year his ssn was active. Just waiting for him to respond

 

[OddOneOut]

I sent an email to the detective and asked what the last year his ssn was active. Just waiting for him to respond

The where might also help. You could check with local cemeteries, churches, coroners (unclaimed or unidentified bodies), local LE concerning unidentified persons (amnesia, dementia, etc.).