PA PA - Ray Gricar, 59, Bellefonte, 15 April 2005 - #13

[JaimeSommers]

I will concede, from personal experience, that flirting on-line is possible. Very Possible.

He would have to be in physical proximity to get someone pregnant.

The fly in the theory that, at least locally, no woman is missing. LE did look at a woman who disappeared at about the same time in the mid west (IA? MO?), but they couldn't find any link.

If there was another woman, she did not leave with him to start a new life. Granted, she could have joined him later.

Please don't patronize me. I know how pregnancy works. You don't know the travel schedule for him every day and weekend in the year(s) preceding his disappearance. And you don't know that PF doesn't know about his travel schedule and perhaps put two and two together. He could have said he was going to visit his nephews or his daughter when he was really going to meet another woman.

The woman doesn't have to be "missing." She could have said that she was relocating for a job, perhaps in Europe. If she was keeping the relationship a secret to protect him, it would make sense. They could have met up at hotels or a country B&B in the Poconos or New York, where no one would know either of them.

Again, purely speculating.

 

[JaimeSommers]

Possible. It wouldn't necessarily explain the secrecy in leaving.

Of course it would. Respectfully, you don't live here and you don't know what it's like to live here, especially for someone in high profile. If he had fallen for a much younger woman and perhaps was going to be a father again, it would embarrass PF for sure, but also his ex-wife. Word would spread like wildfire and they would either be shunned by many in their social circles or befriended by people who just wanted to say they were "in the know."

I've lived here for 26 years. That's how it works.

 

[J. J. in Phila]

Please don't patronize me. I know how pregnancy works. You don't know the travel schedule for him every day and weekend in the year(s) preceding his disappearance. And you don't know that PF doesn't know about his travel schedule and perhaps put two and two together. He could have said he was going to visit his nephews or his daughter when he was really going to meet another woman.

The woman doesn't have to be "missing." She could have said that she was relocating for a job, perhaps in Europe. If she was keeping the relationship a secret to protect him, it would make sense. They could have met up at hotels or a country B&B in the Poconos or New York, where no one would know either of them.

Again, purely speculating.

I'm not trying to patronize, just make a joking observation.

The only trip that I have heard about outside of Central PA, was to Pittsburgh for a DA's conference in mid February. Obviously RFG could have an Internet relationship with a woman in Butte, MT, or someplace likewise remote. It could not a physical one, unless one of them traveled to the other person's location, including a midpoint (and I actually looked at Lewisburg being a midpoint).

It would be possible for RFG to disappear and the other woman to later go to his location. One problem, however, still remains getting out of Lewisburg. This other woman could help him get out, but she'd have to get to Lewisburg if she didn't live there.

 

[J. J. in Phila]

Of course it would. Respectfully, you don't live here and you don't know what it's like to live here, especially for someone in high profile. If he had fallen for a much younger woman and perhaps was going to be a father again, it would embarrass PF for sure, but also his ex-wife. Word would spread like wildfire and they would either be shunned by many in their social circles or befriended by people who just wanted to say they were "in the know."

I've lived here for 26 years. That's how it works.

Respectfully, it did not hurt Joe Amendola (Sandusky's attorney) too much. He was 49 when his second wife's first child was born; she was 17. There was something like a 14 year age difference between the Paternos; he had been at PSU for about a decade when her met her when she was freshman or sophomore.

There is a fairly big age difference between PEF and RFG, 19 years. BG had not been using the name "Gricar" since 1985, and we have at least two SO's between their 1991 divorce and 2005.

As for the social circles, RFG was not part of that. No reference to him going to the County Club (or the Elks Club). Only two close friends, EW and SPS. SPS was known to make jokes about PEF.

RFG wasn't running for anything, or planning to practice, so he wouldn't have to worry about voter or client opinion.

 

[BigCat]

Of course it would. Respectfully, you don't live here and you don't know what it's like to live here, especially for someone in high profile. If he had fallen for a much younger woman and perhaps was going to be a father again, it would embarrass PF for sure, but also his ex-wife. Word would spread like wildfire and they would either be shunned by many in their social circles or befriended by people who just wanted to say they were "in the know."

I've lived here for 26 years. That's how it works.

If gossip spreads like that in Centre County, then wouldn't a more likely explanation for RFG's disappearance be that he heard rumors of Sandusky's inappropriate relationships with boys and walked away rather than deal with the fall out?

 

[J. J. in Phila]

If gossip spreads like that in Centre County, then wouldn't a more likely explanation for RFG's disappearance be that he heard rumors of Sandusky's inappropriate relationships with boys and walked away rather than deal with the fall out?

Gossip spreads like that in small communities.

The area is rather insular.

The problem that I have with the leaving due to embarrassment would only make sense if RFG really had ties to the community, really wanted to belong.

The only things that I could see for either being a reason would be for something either illegal or unethical, and I don't know of anything. If he was part of a criminal conspiracy to cover-up for Sandusky, I could understand him getting out when he did. There is nothing to suggest that he did. If he was involved with a defendant or someone under age, I could understand it. There is nothing to suggest that he was.

 

[J. J. in Phila]

We're all missing something, and I don't know what it is.

 

[MissJ]

I will concede, from personal experience, that flirting on-line is possible. Very Possible.

He would have to be in physical proximity to get someone pregnant.

The fly in the theory that, at least locally, no woman is missing. LE did look at a woman who disappeared at about the same time in the mid west (IA? MO?), but they couldn't find any link.

If there was another woman, she did not leave with him to start a new life. Granted, she could have joined him later.

Or he could simply have joined her wherever she is/was.

 

[MissJ]

Please don't patronize me. I know how pregnancy works. You don't know the travel schedule for him every day and weekend in the year(s) preceding his disappearance. And you don't know that PF doesn't know about his travel schedule and perhaps put two and two together. He could have said he was going to visit his nephews or his daughter when he was really going to meet another woman.

The woman doesn't have to be "missing." She could have said that she was relocating for a job, perhaps in Europe. If she was keeping the relationship a secret to protect him, it would make sense. They could have met up at hotels or a country B&B in the Poconos or New York, where no one would know either of them.

Again, purely speculating.

FWIW this is kinda what I've thought if he is/was a walkaway. Happens to a lot of people of retirement age who suddenly start to rethink their lives and what they want for the rest of it. Makes the most sense of all the theories I've heard. Thanks for the post.

 

[J. J. in Phila]

Or he could simply have joined her wherever she is/was.

Yes, until the story hit CNN. Granted, they could be out if the country.

That goes back to the problem though. If RFG walked away, how did he get out of Lewisburg?

 

[BigCat]

Gossip spreads like that in small communities.

The area is rather insular.

Yes. One of the reasons I believe RFG heard rumors.

The problem that I have with the leaving due to embarrassment would only make sense if RFG really had ties to the community, really wanted to belong.

Not really wanted to belong to the community could also explain why walking way would be a legitimate option for him. I can't imagine a Happy Valley-lifer, like Tim Curley, considering walk away, even though TC must have known jail time in his future was a possibility.

The only things that I could see for either being a reason would be for something either illegal or unethical, and I don't know of anything. If he was part of a criminal conspiracy to cover-up for Sandusky, I could understand him getting out when he did. There is nothing to suggest that he did. If he was involved with a defendant or someone under age, I could understand it. There is nothing to suggest that he was.

There are holes in any theory. I'm only suggesting that a scenario related to Sandusky is more likely than one involving a mistress.

 

[MissJ]

Yes, until the story hit CNN. Granted, they could be out if the country.

That goes back to the problem though. If RFG walked away, how did he get out of Lewisburg?

She could easily have relocated to another community where no one would have any idea who they were. Henry Hill lived near me once and I'd never have known who he was till he started telling people.

 

[MissJ]

She could have driven to pick him up.

 

[MissJ]

Yes. One of the reasons I believe RFG heard rumors.



Not really wanted to belong to the community could also explain why walking way would be a legitimate option for him. I can't imagine a Happy Valley-lifer, like Tim Curley, considering walk away, even though TC must have known jail time in his future was a possibility.



There are holes in any theory. I'm only suggesting that a scenario related to Sandusky is more likely than one involving a mistress.

This was my original theory.

 

[J. J. in Phila]

Yes. One of the reasons I believe RFG heard rumors.



Not really wanted to belong to the community could also explain why walking way would be a legitimate option for him. I can't imagine a Happy Valley-lifer, like Tim Curley, considering walk away, even though TC must have known jail time in his future was a possibility.



There are holes in any theory. I'm only suggesting that a scenario related to Sandusky is more likely than one involving a mistress.

As far as I know, RFG would not be facing jail time, or even an ethical reprimand, for 1998, if the the only thing that happened was he decided not to prosecute Sandusky. Yes, he would look weak, like someone who caved, but that is not illegal.

There would have to be something else.

The "other woman" is a higher possibility, but only because RFG was known to like women and one may have been seen with him.

 

[MissJ]

As far as I know, RFG would not be facing jail time, or even an ethical reprimand, for 1998, if the the only thing that happened was he decided not to prosecute Sandusky. Yes, he would look weak, like someone who caved, but that is not illegal.

There would have to be something else.

The "other woman" is a higher possibility, but only because RFG was known to like women and one may have been seen with him.

An intelligent man is always desirable no matter his age, especially if he is kind and considerate. People who have been apart decades have been known to reconnect at retirement age too. Suddenly they realize what they have missed and they want it at any cost. She could have a career that is mobile like a fellow poster said. They could be living anywhere. Nurses (especially with administrative skills) can go anywhere. Many other countries accept our educational system for nurses with just a little testing. They make as much as RFG did if they are administrative nurses. Where did he go to school, I've forgotten? Also, another poster brought up that RFG's brothers death could have added urgency to RFG's need to enjoy life to the fullest while one can.
This theory explains the change in his behavior in the weeks before. He was feeling guilty. It also explains the need to destroy the hard drive....that is how he communicated with his lady and made their plans. JMO

 

[J. J. in Phila]

An intelligent man is always desirable no matter his age, especially if he is kind and considerate. People who have been apart decades have been known to reconnect at retirement age too. Suddenly they realize what they have missed and they want it at any cost. She could have a career that is mobile like a fellow poster said. They could be living anywhere. Nurses (especially with administrative skills) can go anywhere. Many other countries accept our educational system for nurses with just a little testing. They make as much as RFG did if they are administrative nurses. Where did he go to school, I've forgotten? Also, another poster brought up that RFG's brothers death could have added urgency to RFG's need to enjoy life to the fullest while one can.
This theory explains the change in his behavior in the weeks before. He was feeling guilty. It also explains the need to destroy the hard drive....that is how he communicated with his lady and made their plans. JMO

He went to University of Dayton and Case Western Law.

The question though is, why the secrecy? Why not just call PEF and mail in his resignation?

The finances look like there was not a lot of money left behind.

 

[BigCat]

As far as I know, RFG would not be facing jail time, or even an ethical reprimand, for 1998, if the the only thing that happened was he decided not to prosecute Sandusky. Yes, he would look weak, like someone who caved, but that is not illegal.

There would have to be something else.

The "other woman" is a higher possibility, but only because RFG was known to like women and one may have been seen with him.

So he faked his death to run off with a younger woman? Sounds a bit overly romantic to me -- perhaps the movie version will star Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones.

 

[J. J. in Phila]

So he faked his death to run off with a younger woman? Sounds a bit overly romantic to me -- perhaps the movie version will star Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones.

He didn't actually fake his death.

Would, RFG ran away because he didn't want to answer questions from Sara Ganim, sound better?

 

[BigCat]

He didn't actually fake his death.

Would, RFG ran away because he didn't want to answer questions from Sara Ganim, sound better?

Not having to face Sandusky's victims and explain why he didn't prosecute sounds better. Not having to face his daughter to explain his cowardice sounds better. Not wanting to deal with the wrath of the Penn State football fanatics sounds better. Those are just some the options. I could think of others.

And, by the way, if there was/is "another woman", it wouldn't automatically mean the above possibilities are incorrect. Fleeing with another person and starting a new life together, with brand new identities, is much more attractive when possible scandal is hanging over one's head.


JMO