TN - Joann, 31, & Adrienne Bain, 14, Whiteville, 27 April 2012 - #5

[Bystander66]

I feel AM's mother is just not allowed to see her daughter. This is so tough on this mother.

I know. I was sitting here thinking "Why didn't you go and drag your daughter away from this lunatic?? How could you let her stay with him and be beaten and abused?" It is so much easier to tell people what to do than walk a mile in their shoes. Josie just seems so overwhelmed and defeated now.

 

[HaikuMommy]

I don't get how the parents could have thought there was "nothing not to trust" about AM after the CPS investigation. That just makes no sense. Even if they believed it was unfounded, that would at the very least make most people question and look deeper. Then there's the odd wife, the fact that he never held down a job, the drugs...and how about the motorcycle gang thing, did that get followed up on? And he knew an awful lot of people willing to aid and abet him in a series of major violent felonies.

I feel for the Bain parents, but I don't get how it didn't add up to just the slightest little twinge of "something ain't right with that boy."

I have a friend (not a close one, but we run in the same circles) who was accused of sexual abuse of his own child. I have not said so to him, nor to any of our mutual friends, but I would never let my child be alone with him, even though the charges were determined to be unfounded. If anyone thinks I am "punishing" him unfairly, I am not. I am just being protective of my daughters. Sometime after he was accused (and cleared) he offered to watch my daughters when I hadn't even said I needed a break or was looking for a sitter. I said "no thanks" and distanced myself more after that. I just don't take chances with my kids. Sorry!

I think it is good to be polite and friendly and all, especially when someone has not been proven guilty -- but you can still do that and protect your kids. And I believe you SHOULD take precautions when someone has been accused of sexual misconduct. Your kids are depending on you to protect them!

And just because JB never said a bad word to that friend about AM doesn't mean she wasn't concerned and trying to limit contact. She may have been, we don't know. JMO

 

[Patty G]

fftopic:

Breaking News: TPD: Celis children placed with only 1 parent
http://www.tucsonnewsnow.com/story/18325000/tpd-cps-involvement-with-celis-family-increases

 

[MaryJaneSmith]

http://www2.wspa.com/news/2012/may/11/15/accused-kidnapper-murderer-adam-mayes-found-dead-g-ar-3770600/


Brother of Accused Killer, Kidnapper Says He's Glad He's Dead

and that they don't even plan on claiming the body!

 

[Patty G]

I know. I was sitting here thinking "Why didn't you go and drag your daughter away from this lunatic?? How could you let her stay with him and be beaten and abused?" It is so much easier to tell people what to do than walk a mile in their shoes. Josie just seems so overwhelmed and defeated now.

Well, coming from a very controlling marriage, etc., things are just not as easy as everyone thinks they are.

Women are beaten down both mentally, physically, emotionally, and have no power, exit, afraid, and the list is endless.

ETA: I took my ex back so many times, as I felt safer with him in the house, then I did when he wasn't there. He would stalk me and I just never knew where he was. Now this is back in the 70's but what happened then still happens to women today.

I am not mentally challenged in any way, and am a very strong-willed woman all my life, but this man, inch, by inch, second by second, did a job on me with no escape. I won in the end, but I suffered for it for many years.

 

[pugglesworth]

The way JB supposedly described him to her friend is so completely different from the way his own brother describes him. And never mind the way his wife's family describes him. I mean, it's like night and day.

Yeah it's baffling. I mean I am well aware of how sociopaths can be very superficially charming (it's one of their main features) to people who don't know them very well or who they want something from. But it presupposes a level of conscious self-control and intelligence this guy didn't seem to have. AND the Bains knew him well, and for a long time. And surely GB must have gotten some hint of a "dark side" to AM in all the years they were BILs, before the divorce. And all AM's neighbors knew about the altercations with his wife...surely at least rumors must have gotten back to the Bains.

 

[Jelly Doughnut]

From which link, plz? I missed one, I guess.

http://www2.wspa.com/news/2012/may/11/15/accused-kidnapper-murderer-adam-mayes-found-dead-g-ar-3770600/

 

[Cazzie]

http://www2.wspa.com/news/2012/may/...-murderer-adam-mayes-found-dead-g-ar-3770600/

Thanx , yes, meanwhile I deleted my post when I realized that the video at the link is different than the text article (hate that). The video says similar, but different wording of what you quoted. And the video has other things that the text article does not, and vice versa. :banghead:

 

[Cazzie]

Yeah it's baffling. I mean I am well aware of how sociopaths can be very superficially charming (it's one of their main features) to people who don't know them very well or who they want something from. But it presupposes a level of conscious self-control and intelligence this guy didn't seem to have. AND the Bains knew him well, and for a long time. And surely GB must have gotten some hint of a "dark side" to AM in all the years they were BILs, before the divorce. And all AM's neighbors knew about the altercations with his wife...surely at least rumors must have gotten back to the Bains.

I don't make that assumption.

The friends and neighbors of TM/AM may not even have known how to contact JB/GB. And from the articles I've read with comments from the friends, neighbors and landlord/landlady of TM/AM, they were either told the girls were his (bio), or he thought they were his (bio). And different stories were told by AM to different people.

I'm getting the impression that GB and JB didn't go there as often as their girls did.

 

[Patty G]

fftopic:

Jury has reached a verdict in the Victoria Elizabeth Stafford Murder. Verdict will be read shortly.

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=171727&page=61

Michael Rafferty - Found Guilty First Degree Murder
Guilty Of Sexual Assault Causing Bodily Harm
Guilty of Kidnapping

 

[Bystander66]

So the girls were close to him when he shot himself.

http://abcnews.go.com/US/kidnap-suspect-adam-mayes-cowards-mother-law/story?id=16327123#.T628eXmMLc8

"We saw something lying down by the wood line that caught our attention. We took another five steps, and I gazed around and saw one of the children. An officer started hollering, 'Get your hands up,'" said Master Sgt. Steve Crawford at a news conference today.


A small blonde child peeking over a ridge and spotted by Mississippi state highway troopers led to the rescue of Alexandria and Kyliyah Bain, ages 12 and 8, from kidnapper Adam Mayes on Thursday night, police said in a news conference today.

The girls slowly raised their hands at the officers' command, but Mayes raised only one hand, the officer said.

"Mayes raised his hand and I could see the gun. I hollered 'gun' three times to let my team know, and then Mayes got on his knees. He never brandished the gun toward us, but at that time he took his life," Crawford said.

 

[cluciano63]

Family friend and Joann have been friends since kindergarten ... 26 years.

Wait, who was her friend for 26 years?

 

[Patty G]

Didn't her best friend say she had only known him for 3 years?
I have to say, I am kind of interested in DNA tests, JMO...

I don't recall how long the best friend knows Adam; just recall how long she stated she was friends with Joann.

I did record the show and will post it to my YouTube channel.

 

[Bystander66]

I don't recall how long the best friend knows Adam; just recall how long she stated she was friends with Joann.

I did record the show and will post it to my YouTube channel.

What is the link to your YouTube channel? TIA

 

[Patty G]

Wait, who was her friend for 26 years?

The woman was on Nancy's show - Brenda Foster

Also her husband Rick Foster who spoke to Gary.

 

[WideOpen]

http://www2.wspa.com/news/2012/may/11/15/accused-kidnapper-murderer-adam-mayes-found-dead-g-ar-3770600/


Brother of Accused Killer, Kidnapper Says He's Glad He's Dead

wow, just wow.
This family is just a mess. How could GB have turned a blind eye to the odd relationships going on. From the sounds of this they hated AM and possibly their mother. This son seemed to have forgiveness and no blame towards the father for whatever had happened 16 yrs ago. Odd
JMO

see my problem is "birds of a feather...flock together"
I find all this family dynamics beyond far out there and wacky.

 

[Patty G]

What is the link to your YouTube channel? TIA

http://www.youtube.com/Sierra1947

I am still uploading the show and it will be available within about 15 minutes. Jane's show is already uploaded.

 

[Holly G. Lightly]

I'm not convinced they'd subject especially an 8 year old girl to an exam like that but I could be wrong. I think they'd first take her word for it before traumatizing her further.

I don't think they subjected either one to any extensive examination. Hopefully they didn't, because that would be traumatizing. I suspect they checked vital signs, made sure they were hydrated, fed, rested, comforted, and reunited with their remaining family. I don't know a much about legal stuff, but it's not like they have to pin child rape on a dead perp.

 

[Bystander66]

wow, just wow.
This family is just a mess. How could GB have turned a blind eye to the odd relationships going on. From the sounds of this they hated AM and possibly their mother. This son seemed to have forgiveness and no blame towards the father for whatever had happened 16 yrs ago. Odd
JMO

see my problem is "birds of a feather...flock together"
I find all this family dynamics beyond far out there and wacky.

This must mean even dad wanted nothing to do with the body? So dad is in SC and mom is in jail in TN

 

[Strawberry Field]

http://www2.wspa.com/news/2012/may/11/15/accused-kidnapper-murderer-adam-mayes-found-dead-g-ar-3770600/


Brother of Accused Killer, Kidnapper Says He's Glad He's Dead

ugh, The girls did see the murders of their mother and sister.