TH's emails shed light on Horman split

[txsvicki]

I took the "I didn't know you could do that" remark as sarcasm and snide. It may come out that divorce talk or threats to straighten up or lose the baby will eventually be made known.

 

[germaine]

Ibut then I had the very same thoughts about e-mails to friends & family. Not bashing, just venting frustrations...you think you can do that freely with friends & family and not have to defend it. PLUS, there is history, and on one day you could be talkign about how hard it is to get through homework with your 2nd grader, and then the next how you wanted to kill him because he was acting up PLUS not getting his homework done, because DH was not home. You kinda have the notion that you are allowed to vent without it coming back to bite you. No one really means that they really wanted to kill the little pustule that brought you to the brink while Daddy was out of town, but certainly it helps to vent...
I dunno...

sbm for space

I have a *little postule* -- not so little anymore, really. And I vent about her constantly to almost anyone who will listen. lol And I can guaranty that not one person in the world who has heard me would suspect I'd harmed a hair on her attitude-giving, smart-mouthed, know-it-all, defiant head if she went missing tomorrow. Even if I was the last one to see her. Everyone who is close to me knows how much I love my daughter.

My point is only that I think it would be very easy to distinguish between motherly loving venting and hateful venting. Even under these circumstances. And I would bet a lot of money that when we see the e-mails (almost) every one of us will be quite clear that this wasn't just Terri having a bad day and venting about her much loved *son*. I expect something more along the lines of that awful stepmother post on another website that Chili referred to -- if not that identical one. No one would argue (I don't think) that that stepmother was "just venting." What she said was truly disturbing. jmoo

 

[Trt]

I am personally glad that Terri didn't take K and leave. At least she is safe where she is, IMO.

I am personally not buying anything Terri is selling in this latest email. Jmo

 

[quadlatte]

quote from above article: http://www.katu.com/news/local/108352154.html?
Makes me pay $1000 a month to him for bills although it's my child support and unemployment. I do all the yard work, house work, mowing the lawn, cleaning the gutters.”
But she had time for the gym, drinking, gardners..................


I have no money because I stayed home with Kyron at birth since his natural mom wouldn't - spent all of my 30k to do so. …

another untruth.......BBM

Yeah, but what bugs me most about that sentence is the antiquated (at best) use of the term "natural mom"...

IDK, maybe it's just me or maybe it's the term her adoptive parents used growing up, but it stuck in my craw and seems quite awkward...

It almost implies that if you aren't the natural mom, you are the "unnatural" mom???:waitasec:

 

[Emma Peel]

Oh my.

Let us learn a lesson here.

If you don't want to see it again in court, don't put it in an e-mail. This is a lesson I learned at the dawn of e-mails.

You have no control over what remains in someone else's digital storage, and very often, once you've send it, and they've received it, neither do they.

Trust me. I know. I won a little war with, actually, a half-used roll of fax carbon from an office fax machine. Years ago. It wasn't even digital. But it was a hidden record that no one thought would remain for me to find. They left a trail of evidence about 40 carbon feet long.

(think white collar crime)

Even if Terri took care and deleted her copies of the e-mails she sent ... forensics can figure out who they went to. :yes:

It's not out of the real of possibility that some of these "family member e-mails" might have been subpoenaed.

My final advice: need to keep some communication confidential? use the phone, and trust the heck out of your confidant. :angel:



:cow:

 

[Billylee]

Oh my.

Let us learn a lesson here.

If you don't want to see it again in court, don't put it in an e-mail. This is a lesson I learned at the dawn of e-mails.

You have no control over what remains in someone else's digital storage, and very often, once you've send it, and they've received it, neither do they.

Trust me. I know. I won a little war with, actually, a half-used roll of fax carbon from an office fax machine. Years ago. It wasn't even digital. But it was a hidden record that no one thought would remain for me to find. They left a trail of evidence about 40 carbon feet long.

(think white collar crime)

Even if Terri took care and deleted her copies of the e-mails she sent ... forensics can figure out who they went to. :yes:

It's not out of the real of possibility that some of these "family member e-mails" might have been subpoenaed.

My final advice: need to keep some communication confidential? use the phone, and trust the heck out of your confidant. :angel:



:cow:

Too true, or better yet, meet in person, because you never can tell who else might be listening in on the phone line.

 

[joshiesmom]

Posting for reference:

She said she’s mainly upset right now by finding out things - like Terri’s alleged alcoholism - through the media and court documents and not from Kaine. Kaine said he’s not hiding anything and is just finding out all of this, too.

E-mail: Terri Horman accuses Kaine of being overbearing
Video: http://www.katu.com/news/local/108352154.html?tab=video
Article: http://www.katu.com/news/local/108352154.html?

*snipped & BBM*

How can it be true that Kaine is just now finding out about Terri's supposed alcoholism when he outlined Terri's drunken behavior quite descriptively in a court document?

 

[cluciano63]

I am not about to make judgements about e-mails I have not even read.

 

[Aedrys]

I don't think Terri knew she could just take the baby and leave...remember when Kaine did it? She wrote I didn't know you could do that?

(I wish she had known, if it would mean she did just that many months ago, gone to her parents with the little one...)

Wow, so Kaine needed to take the kids and run and is a bad man for not doing that, but there's all sorts of excuses for why Terri didn't leave and at least take Baby K? Why is there such a double standard here? Terri is a grown woman capable of picking up the keys, the baby, and leaving in her mustang. If we're going to be mad at Kaine for not doing that, then we can't turn around and give Terri a pass for not doing the same thing. That is just not right. The only thing stopping Terri from leaving was her greed and need to have the life she wanted no matter who she hurt around her. And when you really need to change things in your life, you take risks, even if you're broke and scared for the future. It's the only way change is ever going to happen. This is an INSULT to woman who have the courage to take their kids and leave, scared for the future but knowing it's in the best interest of their children and themselves. There is no excuse for Terri not leaving if that is what she needed to do. NONE.

And this email is not normal. I bet no one here was plotting to kill their husbands or children when they wrote their complaining emails, or ever tried to follow through on such thoughts. Normal people don't solve their problems by eliminating people in their lives. This email is only a sample of how self centered, manipulative, and a liar Terri is. This is not a woman venting to friends. This is a woman on a downward spiral, refusing to change herself, and wanting everything to change around her to suit her. The world doesn't revolve around Terri Horman no matter how much she wants it to.

I am so thoroughly disgusted with her. I'm going to stop now because anymore I say will get me banned.

 

[Aedrys]

Too true, or better yet, meet in person, because you never can tell who else might be listening in on the phone line.

Or better yet talk over batphones and make sure to throw them away later. Oh, and make sure you get the batphones from separate stores.

Also, you could take your confidant outside of the house and talk to them there. That way you'll avoid those pesky police bugs inside your home.

Honestly, there's no way to keep anything from the police for sure. The best thing to do is to live an honest life and don't do things like kidnap or murder people.

 

[quadlatte]

Anyone who knows anything about the condition knows it's spelled "Prader-Willi." :innocent:

And I'm pretty sure it's "Down's" Syndrome, not "Down" Syndrome...:banghead:

Shows how detail oriented she must be; for having a master's degree that is a little embarrassing...:waitasec:

 

[STEADFAST]

And I'm pretty sure it's "Down's" Syndrome, not "Down" Syndrome...:banghead:

Shows how detail oriented she must be; for having a master's degree that is a little embarrassing...:waitasec:

I really don't think she has a master's degree. Her linkedin profile doesn't mention a master's degree under "Education." One of the first articles to give a rough timeline for her mentioned that she got a master's degree "around 2004," so that tells you right there that the reporter didn't check up with the school. Maybe she took some graduate-level classes or maybe she just lied, but I'm willing to bet she doesn't have one.

 

[RoseTree]

I'm confused about a statement DY made on Good Morning America...

she says, "on a couple of different occasions Terri had called me specifically so that I could talk to Kyron because he was so upset, and Terri personally wanted me to take Kyron"

I don't understand why TH would call DY to talk to Kyron and comfort him if TH was responsible for upsetting him. Does that make any sense?

Would you call your step-son's mother so she could talk to him if you were abusing him (emotionally, verbally)?

I wonder if it was more like, see, he misses you...he needs you.

 

[grandmaj]

We need to tone it down in here. Please be more tolerant of differing ideas and if you disagree will you please stop and think about how you are phrasing your posts.

This is an emotional issue and can only get worse in the coming weeks. Tone down the posts.

Thanks


post lands at random

 

[nonfictionrocks]

And I'm pretty sure it's "Down's" Syndrome, not "Down" Syndrome...:banghead:

Shows how detail oriented she must be; for having a master's degree that is a little embarrassing...:waitasec:

And I am 100% positive it is Down Syndrome!! I don't need a Master's degree to know - my 9 year has this!!

 

[grandmaj]

I'm seeing way too much baiting in here. Talk about the email. Stop trying to get a reaction from your fellow posters or you will be doing it on a "no expense" vacation. Stay On topic.

 

[ami]

*snipped & BBM*

How can it be true that Kaine is just now finding out about Terri's supposed alcoholism when he outlined Terri's drunken behavior quite descriptively in a court document?

From what Kaine said, he knew of the behavior itself, such as falling asleep at 7 on the couch, angry, staggering, etc - he didn't attribute it to alcoholism until others came forward with more information about Terri and about alcoholism, at which time he put it together and realized it was alcohol and not whatever she said it was (ppd, tiredness, sadness, etc). He now attributes the behavior he'd been dealing with as that of an alcoholic.

 

[Chablis]

From what Kaine said, he knew of the behavior itself, such as falling asleep at 7 on the couch, angry, staggering, etc - he didn't attribute it to alcoholism until others came forward with more information about Terri and about alcoholism, at which time he put it together and realized it was alcohol and not whatever she said it was (ppd, tiredness, sadness, etc). He now attributes the behavior he'd been dealing with as that of an alcoholic.

And who knows what he found in the house after she left it? Maybe there was evidence of bottles of booze, or something hidden, I mean it does happen.

 

[ElizaAvalon]

Thank you grandmaj. I was hoping you'd re-open this thread.

Since the very beginning I have believed Terri is responsible for Kyron's disappearance.

The emails sound very much like someone who is being controlled - or who at least feels like they have no control over their own life.

Every husband and wife does their "life" their own way, the way they do their bills, the choice of the wife and mother staying home to raise the children or going to work, etc.

There is no "right" way - what's "right" is what works for the couple and their family. EQUALLY.

Apparently, whatever was going on in the Horman home was not working for Terri and it sounds to me like she felt pretty helpless.

So she was unhappy. No excuse for what she has done to Kyron, IMO...

 

[Aedrys]

I'm confused about a statement DY made on Good Morning America...

she says, "on a couple of different occasions Terri had called me specifically so that I could talk to Kyron because he was so upset, and Terri personally wanted me to take Kyron"

I don't understand why TH would call DY to talk to Kyron and comfort him if TH was responsible for upsetting him. Does that make any sense?

Would you call your step-son's mother so she could talk to him if you were abusing him (emotionally, verbally)?

I'm thinking it was more, "Here, I'm tired of dealing with him, YOU calm him down and make him feel better."

I doubt this was a happy conversation between Desiree and Terri. I think Terri reached her limit and wanted Desiree to take over on more than one occasion.