What do you think is more tortuous? Being required to testify in a hearing over 3 weeks to get ruled against , then finding small consolations such as him receiving less attention, only to have to respond to a friend who has run across his singles ad because its still up,there?
I ignore almost every correspondence I receive on our lengthy appeals...they go in the garbage unopened although they come several times per year. I've told my advocate to,call me if its something I need to be involved in but the system keeps us updated.
I wrote those posts in an isolated exchange over 25 years now almost now. Torture is every Christmas Eve, the day her body was,found. Torture is an emissary for her killer showing up on my doorstep 2 weeks before Christmas asking my assistance with his appeal. We live with recurring torture every year as this goes on.
Yet I manage a successful professional life and loving relationships and opportunities to help when I can. This sharing was meant to educate what families deal with post death penalty.
If you walk in my shoes and find a better way to cope, I'm all ears. I'm doing the best I can, and at times it includes being completely pissed off and outraged and I use this voice God gave me.