11 year old commits suicide.

[lizzybeth]

I assume it's the dad writing this. What I don't understand is if he knew things were this bad for his daughter why he didn't sue for custody. Maybe there are circumstances that prevented this or maybe he did. I don't know. I just can't imagine knowing your child is living in a situation like that and not doing everything possible (I wouldn't be above kidnapping my own child) to get them out of it.

That poor, poor baby. I would be worried for her brother too. Since like a lot of us said it does run in families. He must feel really alone now.

 

[6angels]

I assume it's the dad writing this. What I don't understand is if he knew things were this bad for his daughter why he didn't sue for custody. Maybe there are circumstances that prevented this or maybe he did. I don't know. I just can't imagine knowing your child is living in a situation like that and not doing everything possible (I wouldn't be above kidnapping my own child) to get them out of it.

That poor, poor baby. I would be worried for her brother too. Since like a lot of us said it does run in families. He must feel really alone now.

yes it is the dad ( or so they said) and I TOTALLY agree with you. It seems everyone let this child down.

 

[Pocono Sleuther]

I have an 11yr old and just can't imagine how this happens. I agree theere must have been some sort of abuse. She must have been desperate to escape something.

 

[Pocono Sleuther]

OneLostGirl, you said that so very well. So many people don't understand that true clinical depression can be a FATAL disease.

Very well said Shamrock. :blowkiss: :clap:

 

[southcitymom]

One of the difficult parts of the disease of depression is that it affects everyone else that is close to you. You become a shell of your former self. Some people shun you and others are perplexed and heartbroken. This all happened after the birth of my twins over thrirty years ago. At that time people were put in state hospitals. My husband left me with four children and my family was ashamed of me. I never wanted to hurt my babies but I did try suicide (obviously I'm here). I was taking thorazine and prolyxin. It took me over 5 years but I got over it slowly by throwing away the pills. Those medications were horrible. Even after improving (I am very thankful) I felt depressed but I kept going and finally antidepressents became available. They have helped and they don't make me euphoric or sleepy, but they cannot do the whole job. It's like a sleeping tiger. I basically got over the worst depression when I was in my thirties, raised my children, and remarried a wonderful man; however, I am always aware of my limitations because It never goes away. It does get better. Of course I have had some hits in life because I'm a young old lady, but I have survived. For you young guys I pray that researchers find a cure for depression in your lifetime but in the meantime we'll all take it a day at a time. OneLostGirl, mywarmbluefleece, IrishMist, Shamrock, and Lizzybeth I'm with you. My heart breaks for that 11 year old girl. Where were her parents and teachers? I think Junior Highs are not a good situation for young adolescents. The school population is too big and a child gets lost in the crowd. I wish the educational system would go back to K-8. Teachers and counselors could keep a closer eye on an at-risk child.

Terrific post, chiperoni. That first part also describes the disease of addiction to a tee. In many ways, depression and addiction mirror each other exactly. Often, they exist side by side and it's a "which came first - the chicken or the egg?" scenario.

I hope this child is in a better place and my continued prayers for her family.

 

[SieSie]

Soooo sad. May she rest in peace.

 

[chiperoni]

Terrific post, chiperoni. That first part also describes the disease of addiction to a tee. In many ways, depression and addiction mirror each other exactly. Often, they exist side by side and it's a "which came first - the chicken or the egg?" scenario.

I hope this child is in a better place and my continued prayers for her family.

Tnx south city mom, Prayers too for this innocent little girl that she is in a better place and for the broken hearts left behind.

 

[iNTERESTEDWOMAN]

I have to wonder if this girl really committed suicide, or if it was the chocking game gone bad. If she was found with her legs touching the ground, there is a very good possibility she was playing the chocking game by herself in order to "get high". I know of TWO young kids who died this way, and both cases where originally determined suicide.

This case sounds so eerily like the death of a girl in my sons class, (Down to the dysfunctional family to Mom's live-in) it took a few weeks before few kids got the nerve to tell counselors that they regularly played this game with the deceased girl. She hung herself in her bedroom with a belt, the problem happened when she passed out before she could loosen the belt and died. To my total amazement, this stupid game is played frequently in my tiny town Nebraska, USA.

 

[Grainne Dhu]

I grew up in the fifties. My parents (who are still married and recently celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary) are of different races. Mixed race marriages and mixed race children were even less acceptable than black marriages and children (or, as they were called back then, "negro").

My kindergarten teacher was wonderful, very accepting and very much in control of the classroom. She didn't allow any bullying or bigoted behaviour.

Unfortunately, my first grade teacher not only allowed bullying and bigoted behaviour, she was a bully and bigot herself. I can clearly remember sitting in that classroom at age six wishing I could go to sleep and never wake up. I didn't know what death was but I knew I didn't want to live any more. If I had known how to do so, I am sure I would have committed suicide.

This was back before every family had a TV, before the internet, before people talked openly about so many things. It's a two edged sword--children are so much better informed now than they were then but children are also exposed to the knowledge of many things that weren't even whispered about back then.

On a different tangent, I wonder if this child had suffered a head injury within the last three years. People who have suffered even relatively minor concussions are at much higher risk for depression for up to three years after the initial injury.

 

[justche]

I assume it's the dad writing this. What I don't understand is if he knew things were this bad for his daughter why he didn't sue for custody. Maybe there are circumstances that prevented this or maybe he did. I don't know. I just can't imagine knowing your child is living in a situation like that and not doing everything possible (I wouldn't be above kidnapping my own child) to get them out of it.

That poor, poor baby. I would be worried for her brother too. Since like a lot of us said it does run in families. He must feel really alone now.

If he's 2000 miles away, and no criminal charges are filed - there's no way a judge would uproot without major proof. Otherwise it just looks like "another" bitter custody suit.

I agree I would kidnap my child - but then you're automatically out of favor.

That poor dad - the poor little girl to not have anyone to go to for real help. I feel so bad reading through the responses here....such pain.

 

[OneLostGrl]

One of the difficult parts of the disease of depression is that it affects everyone else that is close to you. You become a shell of your former self. Some people shun you and others are perplexed and heartbroken. This all happened after the birth of my twins over thrirty years ago. At that time people were put in state hospitals. My husband left me with four children and my family was ashamed of me. I never wanted to hurt my babies but I did try suicide (obviously I'm here). I was taking thorazine and prolyxin. It took me over 5 years but I got over it slowly by throwing away the pills. Those medications were horrible. Even after improving (I am very thankful) I felt depressed but I kept going and finally antidepressents became available. They have helped and they don't make me euphoric or sleepy, but they cannot do the whole job. It's like a sleeping tiger. I basically got over the worst depression when I was in my thirties, raised my children, and remarried a wonderful man; however, I am always aware of my limitations because It never goes away. It does get better. Of course I have had some hits in life because I'm a young old lady, but I have survived. For you young guys I pray that researchers find a cure for depression in your lifetime but in the meantime we'll all take it a day at a time. OneLostGirl, mywarmbluefleece, IrishMist, Shamrock, and Lizzybeth I'm with you. My heart breaks for that 11 year old girl. Where were her parents and teachers? I think Junior Highs are not a good situation for young adolescents. The school population is too big and a child gets lost in the crowd. I wish the educational system would go back to K-8. Teachers and counselors could keep a closer eye on an at-risk child.

*hugs* I'm glad you are here

 

[OneLostGrl]

Terrific post, chiperoni. That first part also describes the disease of addiction to a tee. In many ways, depression and addiction mirror each other exactly. Often, they exist side by side and it's a "which came first - the chicken or the egg?" scenario.

I hope this child is in a better place and my continued prayers for her family.

I agree and firmly believe in "12 step" meetings for the mentally ill, dual diagnosed or not.

 

[chiperoni]

*hugs* I'm glad you are here

Tnx OneLostGirl. We are taking it one day at a time.:blowkiss:

 

[imthemom]

I found this in the comments on this page .. Makes me so sad. If she was being abused and her dad and grandparents and family knew this why did they not step in and do something?
http://www.pjstar.com/news/x192204800/Parents-mourn-senseless-death

bethanysdad
8 hours ago
Report Abuse
Listening to your child's complaints, fears, and other issues aren't limited to just teasing at the hands of cruel classmates. I assure you Bethany wasn't ignored solely on those things alone. That little girl was subjected to some of the most heinous abuse and neglect imaginable, and more than once, her claims went untended.
I'm quite sure her mother is heartbroken, but ask her about the years of disgusting sexual abuse at the hands of her boyfriend, Michael Good. Ask her how many boyfriends she had that threatened, neglected, and abused my baby girl. Ask her how long she'd been bouncing from place to place. Ask her about living with my brother and sister, and how my brother and sister-at different points-had to care for, and look after Bethany and Erik. Ask her why she never contacted me to help with things if her life consisted of living out of hotel rooms, while at the same time locking those little kids out of them. While you're at it, ask her about Bethany coming to live with me in 2000, with a case of head lice so advanced and ignored, Bethany had dug scabs into her scalp. Go on, ask her. Ask her if she knows that both her parents have told me those kids were better off with me because Bethany's mom couldn't quite get it together. Then ask her why her baby girl wanted out of this life so badly. Watch her distribute blame to everyone but herself.

Where would Bethany get an idea like that? I don't know, but you could ask her mother about the many years of allowing those kids to watch graphically violent movies. Then ask her what she said to me when I expressed concern on the issue.

Don't kid yourselves...a little girl doesn't hang herself in the yard without a good reason, and simply being teased or bullied at school isn't a good enough reason to me. I knew my daughter better than that. She was strong-willed, and confident. Ask her mother if she knew about Bethany telling me over the phone that her mother was a 'failure as a parent'.

Then ask yourself if something shouldn't be done.

That's horrible. I know her aunt who my sister used to babysit for and is the manager at our local McDonald's, said that the home life was not good but did not elaborate. The mother was her sister but she said she was making herself look like she was very innocent in this whole thing.

 

[Txmom]

I can remember when my son was in Jr High. Here was this kid, he was the next to smallest in the whole school, in Band, played the tuba, carried a backpack with books, and took his lunch. Picture this, a small blonde haired kid, carrying a mini tuba (barritone??) his backpack, and his lunch box. I chuckle just thinking of it. He could NEVER make it to class on time, always late. He was getting extremely depressed, didnt want to go to school because every teacher made a comment to him when he walked into the door, and all the students in the class looked at him., etc. After about a week, I decided that I had had enough. I called a meeting with all the teachers and explained how they were to handle this kid. When he walked in late, they were to smile, nod their head that they saw him, and continue on, dont comment about him being late, etc. Several of the teachers balked, but agreed to try this for 2 weeks. After 2 weeks I received phone calls from the teachers telling me that I apparently knew my child, because he was happier and arriving to class on time. The pressure was off of him for the two weeks and he just needed time to settle into the new school and routine.

Parents need to know what is best for their children and act on it.