A word of caution - Take a breather or 4

[txsvicki]

I'm sort of confused about this thread. How do some posters know so much about other posters lives to be able to take a few posts joking about eating take out for awhile and turn it into neglecting their children? With so many different posters at all times of the day, how would anyone really know someone else's business or that they have a "problem"? If anyone does claim to know which poster's are having a problem, how long they stay online, or if they have kids or not, then they could also possibly have a big problem.

 

[ketel0ne]

I'm sort of confused about this thread. How do some posters know so much about other posters lives to be able to take a few posts joking about eating take out for awhile and turn it into neglecting their children? With so many different posters at all times of the day, how would anyone really know someone else's business or that they have a "problem"? If anyone does claim to know which poster's are having a problem, how long they stay online, or if they have kids or not, then they also have a big problem and obsession.

IMO it came about from certain posters actually posting all the things they had neglected in their own lives (cooking, cleaning, other activites), how many hours they had spent on WS or the case in general. Many people have stated that many in their personal lives have commented that this case has changed them and their normal behavior.

 

[Cakegirl]

With so many different posters at all times of the day, how would anyone really know someone else's business or that they have a "problem"?

I know for myself, I've joked a few times about not getting stuff around the house done because of this case... although I was mostly joking (I'm used to being behind in laundry! That stuff adds up quickly! lol). I don't think my DH or kiddos have felt neglected in any way -- and maybe I've even appreciated my family even more seeing how all this has unfolded so far. Heck, my husband has even lost sleep over Caylee's disappearance and I wouldn't doubt if he's even logged onto to WS to catch up... and he's never been a news guy -- especially a little missing girl news guy.

But honestly, when Jennifer Kesse went missing in 06 -- that was the 1st case that I really devoted a lot of time to. I could so relate to her (young professional girl living alone) and I hoped & prayed that she'd be found quickly. I really had to pull myself away b/c I was becoming very sad about Jenn not being found. Just knowing that her family might not have the closure that they deserved. I knew that I needed to take a break. Sadly, she's still missing today.

We all need a break every now and then... :blowkiss:

 

[suzet]

I know a lot of the "you know you're obsessed" thread was tongue in cheek, right? It was for me, but I did notice much of the computer time I used to spend on my other fave message board (non-sleuthing), was now spent here.

I do realize that nothing major seems to change with the case in the grand scheme of things. You can take more time off and be updated with the latest goings on in a much shorter period of time. I have sensed a definite lull in the case (for me, not for LE, I'm sure).

 

[Friptzap]

I'm sort of confused about this thread. How do some posters know so much about other posters lives to be able to take a few posts joking about eating take out for awhile and turn it into neglecting their children? With so many different posters at all times of the day, how would anyone really know someone else's business or that they have a "problem"? If anyone does claim to know which poster's are having a problem, how long they stay online, or if they have kids or not, then they could also possibly have a big problem.

I do not profess to know anyone here or know anyone's personal business. There is really nothing to be confused about. This is just some words of caution for some people who may allow themselves to get too involved in this case to the point that it becomes a detriment on their own lives.

I have read numerous posts where people have stated that they were ignoring their chores and even preparing dinner, and how the rest of the family understands and has pitched in to allow them this time to come here and or elsewhere and research this case and so on and so on yes some perhaps were jokes but some perhaps were not and obviously several in this thread have stated both and even a combination of both. Please feel free to ignore everything I have said here if you feel it does not apply to you or even if it does and you still choose to ignore what I say by all means that is sincerely your business.

Apparently several people have even replied in this thread that they too felt they were letting this get the better of them and need to take some time and step back for a while.

Not everyone has to turn off this case all at the same time, there will always be people here to care for things and keep things moving. When 59 are taking a break there will still be 1500 searching. The sentiments I have posted here are not mine alone, these have also been mentioned by many others as well on various threads. This is supposed to be a simple reminder that, hey, the burden is not on you alone please feel free to step away for a while and do some other things don’t feel like you must be here 24/7 or it will not get resolved. 5 million people could be here 24/7 and it still may not get resolved.

Anyway, I think I said it best in the original post on this thread and it seems many people are grateful that I mentioned it and I am glad I could give them some insight that will allow them to come back with a fresh mind to search some more.

 

[Short_Stuff]

I was getting so mad that I felt like breaking the tv when I saw Casey on it...lol. (not normal for me as I am calm/laid back).
And my husband said I was getting "obsessed" with the story and he said if people watch that webcam all day they have no life.
So, Caylee is in my prayers daily and will continue to check on the news, just not "as much".

 

[Lady Loves Lurking]

Why this case has been good for me:

1. I have made the young parents in my life aware that they can always, ALWAYS leave their child with me. Seriously. Just call me. I'll show up. We don't have to mention this to Mom or Dad.

2. I will teach my son that, above all else, he must always tell the truth.

3. I will spend more time with my family (child/spouse) than I do working on my own recreational endeavors.
3A. That includes Websleuths.


I think the Anthony family has taught us a great, many things. It has made me smother the ones I love with sentiment. My life is good and I am thankful.

My best to you all!
You're all really, lovely people. It makes me feel proud to be an American, knowing you all, here.

 

[Laece]

You're all really, lovely people. It makes me feel proud to be an American, knowing you all, here.

this was very kind, and i can't agree with you more.

 

[concentric]

I'm sort of confused about this thread. How do some posters know so much about other posters lives to be able to take a few posts joking about eating take out for awhile and turn it into neglecting their children? With so many different posters at all times of the day, how would anyone really know someone else's business or that they have a "problem"? If anyone does claim to know which poster's are having a problem, how long they stay online, or if they have kids or not, then they could also possibly have a big problem.

I also felt that the thread sounded judgemental and some people may feel lectured to.

BTW, I just took a break aside from family and responsibilities to watch the programs about 9/11.

 

[FLjay]

Why this case has been good for me:
...
I think the Anthony family has taught us a great, many things. It has made me smother the ones I love with sentiment. My life is good and I am thankful. ...

I agree; this has led to me to soul searching and hard reality.

I realized an irony early on that has helped me keep perspective and priorities more in place: this is about a woman who was utterly irresponsible with her young child and whose priorities are totally out of whack ... and a family that is being utterly destroyed over lies and subterfuge.

I did not want to be similarly irresponsible, regardless of good intentions.

Part of the anger I have felt as this drags on is that so many others, one way or another, are Casey's victims. My family is too precious to me to become additional victims.

Prayers for all who are working for a solution in this heartbreaking situation, and for all who feel the loss.

 

[concentric]

What is very perplexing here is that Casey seemed to revel in her ability to deceive those around her in order to get what she wanted, but she didn't realize she was deceiving herself as well. I think that is what evil looks like.

 

[Friptzap]

I also felt that the thread sounded judgemental and some people may feel lectured to.

BTW, I just took a break aside from family and responsibilities to watch the programs about 9/11.

Everyone sees things differently depending on there own point of view, I would say the majority of the people who posted that this thread was welcomed and helped them speaks for itself. I am glad to here when people do take a break from this also, all though the 9/11 shows are almost as heavy to absorb, at least they are for me. I prefer light subject matter like astrophysics! Well ok science fiction but its close! But hey everyone has different limits and everyone has different needs and ways to find release.

I avoided judgement and from the beggining pointed out that this was a thread meant to aid people as from my observations it seems many needed some help to break away, these observations based on their own comments. Specific comments not just because they have too many posts. I have no clue as to how many posts anyone has made here and could care less. Some people are serious when they say their neglecting the family becsause of this case. They have even mentioned how their spouses have picked up the slack, children have provided their own meals, Even on this thread someone said they did not bath for several days when this case started up. This is not judgement on my part its observation that people are actually neglecting their own lives based on their own words.

There is an old saying you can please some of the people some of the time but you cannot please all of the people all of the time. And I don't ever expect everyone to ever have the same point of view as me. Considering my personal tastes in life I expect very few at that

This is a very positive thread meant to help people and apparently many feel it has again that speaks for itself and I will just leave it at that.

For that matter I should have been in bed 3 hours ago but I was typing something else up to submitt on this and could not stop in the middle of it. But now I am off to sleepy sleepy......

 

[Misfit76]

"living here and "browsing" life."

Wow, that is exactly what Ive been feeling like for a few months now. I do appreciate this thread, I know it was meant in a positive light. I admit, as I said on another post, I am way too obsessed with this case and way too emotionally involved. I dont get on the pc when my son is awake and would never neglect him for any reason, esp not for the computer. But honestly I have neglected my own hobbies, other sites I used to frequent, and unfortunately my husband. My every waking thought is consumed with Caylee and praying for her to be found. It hurts, and its extremely mentally exhausting, but I have been trying to take a breather from this more now than I was in the beginning.

 

[Sassynic]

Why this case has been good for me:

1. I have made the young parents in my life aware that they can always, ALWAYS leave their child with me. Seriously. Just call me. I'll show up. We don't have to mention this to Mom or Dad.

2. I will teach my son that, above all else, he must always tell the truth.

3. I will spend more time with my family (child/spouse) than I do working on my own recreational endeavors.
3A. That includes Websleuths.


I think the Anthony family has taught us a great, many things. It has made me smother the ones I love with sentiment. My life is good and I am thankful.

My best to you all!
You're all really, lovely people. It makes me feel proud to be an American, knowing you all, here.

Great rules to live by!!! I am doing #3 from now on. I cannot leave my fiance to watch my infant son for hours on end while I obsess online for any reason (WS, news, Myspace, ect). Everyone tells me the baby stage is too short and I will regret not enjoying every moment. I don't ever plan on having another child so I better be here for every minute of his life because I'm not going to get another chance (by choice).

 

[Sassynic]

I also felt that the thread sounded judgemental and some people may feel lectured to.

BTW, I just took a break aside from family and responsibilities to watch the programs about 9/11.

I don't feel it was judgemental. I consider judgemental to say something like, "people who do this are silly." But no where in that original post did the OP put a judgement on those who may benefit from the reminder.

I for one appreciated the post because I tend to fall into things quite easily and obsess about them until someone pulls me out. I was addicted to a couple of online games at one point in my life. Then I got addicted to Myspace and some message boards...now I'm noticing that I'm slipping into obsessing about finding Caylee.

For me, and I can ONLY speak for myself....I appreciate the reminders.

Lucky for me though, my fiance keeps me in check and I keep him in check with his online gaming so we are always going out doing things as a family with our infant son.

Either way, the original post didn't seem to be judgemental at all IMO.

 

[lillygator]

I also felt that the thread sounded judgemental and some people may feel lectured to.

I agree.

 

[Kolchak]

It's interesting how many people have become so attached to this case. News breaks on the case and so does the server. It's like a stampede on the forums. I'm amazed that some people I have talked to have not even heard of it. The emotions are running high in this forum and I think it is good for some to step away occasionaly because this can be unhealthy for some. Imagine what the detectives are feeling.

 

[Sassynic]

I think the issue with being online as opposed to talking on the phone or in person is sometimes words can be misconstrued depending on how the person percieves the tone. This is OT but I remember once my co workers and I receieved an email from our supervisor. Half of us took it to be harsh, cold, and boardline mean while the other half read the email as an FYI, very professional email. Because our super sent the email then went straight home, none of us could ask her about it until the following Monday.

On Monday, after a weekend of stewing (for the half of us that took offense to the email), we all asked her to clarify and it turned out....we were wrong, the half that took offense. She didn't mean for it to sound so cold. She said she should have stuck a couple of smilies in there. LOL

I guess my point is that, some feel the original post in this thread is "judgemental and lecturing" while others read it like a caring piece of realistic advice not meant to offend or cause harm. Guess it depends on the tone you read it with.

 

[Laece]

I guess my point is that, some feel the original post in this thread is "judgemental and lecturing" while others read it like a caring piece of realistic advice not meant to offend or cause harm. Guess it depends on the tone you read it with.

or if it hits home for someone and puts them on the defensive...

just sayin'! the possibility is there.

 

[one_hooah_wife]

TY Friptzap for starting this thread ... it is needed and appreciated. I for one have bordered on obsessed ... 38y/o and pregnant (yeah, I question my sanity too) I cannot afford to be this consumed. When I read certain threads (opinions) I feel my BP go up and contractions become more regular. So, I know that it really affects me in a negative way. But Caylee has captured the hearts of the world and the thought that she is out there somewhere alone ... and that her killer goes unpunished, makes me sick.

Thanks for the reminder to take care of ourselves ... my husband says thanks too!