AZ - Isabel Mercedes Celis, 6, Tucson, 20 April 2012 - #10

[mck16]

Boys get very curious and "aroused" at fairly young age, and by 14 ... well they know a heck of a lot!

That may be true, but not toward their 6 year old baby sister. jmo

 

[katydid23]

What if you were a single mother and there were only two rooms for your 5 children to sleep in. Would it matter if brothers and sisters slept in the same room. I don't think so. Children are not having sexual thoughts at that age. It is obvious the adults are though. jmo

I am sorry, but the older brother , at 14, is probably having a lot of sexual thoughts. Certainly not aimed at his little sister, but it is not true that he is not feeling sexual at his age.

 

[cluciano63]

I don't think we even know if the "uncle" is a blood relative.

 

[mck16]

"Incest has been cited as the most common form of child abuse. Studies conclude that 43 percent (43%) of the children who are abused are abused by family members, 33 percent (33%) are abused by someone they know, and the remaining 24 percent (24%) are sexually abused by strangers (Hayes, 1990). Other research indicates that over 10 million Americans have been victims of incest."

http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/main.aspx?dbName=DocumentViewer&DocumentID=32360

According to statistics, MOST child abuse consists of some type of incest.

I am sorry that it makes you mad, but if we are going to assume that Isabel was a victim of sexual assault, there is a rational reason to consider the very real possibility of insist.

So that means that more than 60% are not. Or rather 57%.

 

[katydid23]

That may be true, but not toward their 6 year old baby sister. jmo

I don't think you truly understand the dynamics of incest. My uncle was only 16 when he began raping me. And that was actually something I began to understand when I later found out that he had been abused by our priest when my uncle was the altar boy. He held in that pain for so long that it finally exploded.

And my mother felt exactly the same way you do. Blood relatives would never hurt her family. And that is why when she divorced and needed to work, she did not want us to go to strangers for childcare. She felt better having her baby brother come over after school everyday, to protect us from the strangers.

 

[cluciano63]

So that means that more than 60% are not. Or rather 57%.

I think more than half is a lot...JMO

 

[liltexans]

I think I'd be more concerned about the 14 year old brother's teenage friends doing something to Isa than her brother hurting her himself.

 

[katydid23]

So that means that more than 60% are not. Or rather 57%.

Right. 53% are not. They are made up of various subgroups. But the LARGEST subgroup id blood relatives.

 

[callyn]

I know we don't know this for sure, but if it's true that Isa normally slept with her brother(s)...does anyone else find it odd that a 6yo girl would sleep with a 10 or 14yo brother? I only have girls so I don't know if that would be normal or not??

MAYBE with a 10 yr old brother, but not with a 14 year old. I have an older brother and we used to sleep together on vacations etc. but only until he reached about 10 or 11.

 

[HeinekenMan]

I find it absurd that people are insinuating that there is some risk in having a little girl sleep in the same room as her 14-year-old brother. Yes, teenage boys have a lot of sexual curiosity, but that does not mean they are going to be sexually aroused by a 6-year-old sibling. Good grief. Get a grip, people. Not every person in the world with access to a young child is going to sexually abuse the child. The vast majority of people do not do that sort of stuff. If you're keeping a little girl away from her big brother, who is probably her hero, because of irrational fears, you are doing that child a disservice.

 

[mck16]

I don't think you truly understand the dynamics of incest. My uncle was only 16 when he began raping me. And that was actually something I began to understand when I later found out that he had been abused by our priest when my uncle was the altar boy. He held in that pain for so long that it finally exploded.

And my mother felt exactly the same way you do. Blood relatives would never hurt her family. And that is why when she divorced and needed to work, she did not want us to go to strangers for childcare. She felt better having her baby brother come over after school everyday, to protect us from the strangers.

I understand abuse. And I certainly am familiar with molestation by priests. That is not what I am addressing. I am speaking to the fact that from early on the 'uncle/cousin' was being profiled here on this site because he was an 'uncle'. With no other proof or incidents, but only because he was an uncle. And he was the only one who came forward and spoke so he was really the only other person we knew about except the parents. Or the brothers. And surely no one is suggesting one of the brothers did something. I am sorry for your experiences, I really am. But, I think we as responsible people need to hear all the facts. And I don't or haven't seen that happening. jmo

 

[dsntslp]

So much easier just to pile 'em all in the living room.

All I am saying on the matter.

 

[mck16]

I think more than half is a lot...JMO

Don't think that is more than half. jmo

 

[callyn]

What if you were a single mother and there were only two rooms for your 5 children to sleep in. Would it matter if brothers and sisters slept in the same room. I don't think so. Children are not having sexual thoughts at that age. It is obvious the adults are though. jmo

BBM, they do have sexual thoughts at that age. I speak from experience. It is not a good idea to have girls sleeping with boys, IMO.

 

[Frigga]

A child is missing, possibly abducted, raped, injured, or worse. We are going through all of the possibilities in the absence of cold, hard, facts. That is what we do here. Most of the women I know (and there are MANY) who have been molested have been molested by a family member... it happens, and it is a possibility. We are pondering possibilities. It does not make us sick, depraved, or close minded. I just had to say my peace.

 

[katydid23]

I find it absurd that people are insinuating that there is some risk in having a little girl sleep in the same room as her 14-year-old brother. Yes, teenage boys have a lot of sexual curiosity, but that does not mean they are going to be sexually aroused by a 6-year-old sibling. Good grief. Get a grip, people. Not every person in the world with access to a young child is going to sexually abuse the child. The vast majority of people do not do that sort of stuff. If you're keeping a little girl away from her big brother, who is probably her hero, because of irrational fears, you are doing that child a disservice.

I don't think anyone said there was a danger allowing her to sometimes sleep in the same room as her 14 yr old brother. The issue is whether it is a good policy for an every night thing. Little girls stop walking around naked when they have older brothers, mostly for the sake of the older brothers themselves. It is just very hard for a 14 and 15 yr old to begin dealing with their sudden onslaught of hormonal influences. So having a young girl walking around naked, or sleeping in their bed every night, is best avoided.

nd my kids slept on the same bed under various circumstances, like vacations, camping etc. But as a general rule, girls and boys deserve privacy once puberty encroaches, imo.

 

[cluciano63]

Some posters found the sentences the "uncle" used when he spoke out to be odd, unusual, whatever...that he spoke more about his reaction to Isobel being gone than about Isobel, etc...which is just one thing that stood out to some. I don't think anyone is judging him just because he is a relative of some kind...JMO

 

[mck16]

I don't think anyone said there was a danger allowing her to sometimes sleep in the same room as her 14 yr old brother. The issue is whether it is a good policy for an every night thing. Little girls stop walking around naked when they have older brothers, mostly for the sake of the older brothers themselves. It is just very hard for a 14 and 15 yr old to begin dealing with their sudden onslaught of hormonal influences. So having a young girl walking around naked, or sleeping in their bed every night, is best avoided.

nd my kids slept on the same bed under various circumstances, like vacations, camping etc. But as a general rule, girls and boys deserve privacy once puberty encroaches, imo.

I slept with a man for 10 years and the last 5 he never touched me. So, just because you are sleeping there doesn't mean it is sexual. jmo

 

[insatiable]

I don't think people "profiled" him just because he's an uncle. He MIGHT have been in the home that night. No matter who he is people will look at him just for being there. He spoke about Isabel in past tense while speaking to the media, which IMO is hinky.

 

[mck16]

Some posters found the sentences the "uncle" used when he spoke out to be odd, unusual, whatever...that he spoke more about his reaction to Isobel being gone than about Isobel, etc...which is just one thing that stood out to some. I don't think anyone is judging him just because he is a relative of some kind...JMO

What exactly did he say in his one interview. Sorry, but I missed it. tia