Connecticut school district on lockdown after shooting report at a Newtown elemen #5

[Kimster]

@GovMalloyOffice tweeted:
GovMalloyOffice
We are asking that on Friday, Dec. 21 at 9:30am, the entire State of #CT observe a moment of silence.

 

[Jen38]

I'm going to toss this out to you guys...

I'm wondering if the cause could be bullying? Kids with Asperger's have been known to be bullied and when they are in middle school it's really bad for them. My son was miserable daily during that time in his life and I can't post the things the kids said to him in middle school cuz I'd have to give myself a time out for the language. Perhaps this burned something in his brain that he couldn't come to terms with...

You're describing my daughter's middle school years as well. It's not uncommon I believe to have kids be diagnosed w/ Asperger's later as they approach adolescence, because that is when the social issues come to the forefront, and when kids, quite frankly, are at their nastiest.
I was talking to my daughter today about all of this...their choir gave a holiday performance today at a school assembly, with a moment of silence for the Conn. tragedy. Both the school principal and choir director gave very heartfelt speeches about what occurred, and then the choir sang, 'Breath of Heaven'. My daughter said it took about half of the song to not break down and cry because it spoke SO powerfully to this tragedy. She was speaking of this with a close friend who is also an Aspie, and they both feel that people will use this as a reason to bully those with differences. She keeps her Asperger's a secret, as she doesn't want to deal with the drama it would cause ~ this is what she said to me. I told her this is why we keep talking about this, to educate others. She feels people are not that tolerant about differences. It makes me sad...

 

[mikeysmommom]

police aren't a conduit to relieve parental stress. Calling cops will escalate the situation. Kids become pretty stressed after being strip searched and thrown into a cell by themselves. That's the LAST thing a mentally-ill child needs to have happen.

JMO

Some times is it the only way if she did not call police he may escalate and cause harm to those around him. I read it and what I took away from it was she is a mother who has tried and will continue to find some way to help her son and also the other people in the world who will have to deal with him.To most it seems extreme to call police to me she is a mother who is not in denial and wants help desperately.

 

[nursebeeme]

@GovMalloyOffice tweeted:
GovMalloyOffice
We are asking that on Friday, Dec. 21 at 9:30am, the entire State of #CT observe a moment of silence.

I hope every state in the country does this. I know I will be observing that here in Michigan

 

[Donjeta]

I'm going to toss this out to you guys...

I'm wondering if the cause could be bullying? Kids with Asperger's have been known to be bullied and when they are in middle school it's really bad for them. My son was miserable daily during that time in his life and I can't post the things the kids said to him in middle school cuz I'd have to give myself a time out for the language. Perhaps this burned something in his brain that he couldn't come to terms with...

It was a concern for the school staff.

Adam was not physically bullied, although he may have been teased, Novia said.
...
Even so, Novia said, his primary concern was that Adam might become a target for abuse by his fellow students, not that he might become a threat.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/15/adam-lanza-pain-loner-teacher_n_2308641.html

Mr Novia said he told the school's three security staffers who reported to him to carefully monitor the student and 'where he was, who he was with, and what he was doing'.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...babysitter-Never-turn-Adam.html#ixzz2FLSy8h9c

If the adults really kept such a careful eye on him it might have shielded him from physical bullying but there are other kinds that are more difficult to catch.

But then again, like Asperger's, plenty of bullied kids never hurt anyone.

If we're ever going to know why, I think we're probably going to find that the cause isn't any one thing, it's a combination of factors, a perfect storm that came together.

 

[KMouse]

police aren't a conduit to relieve parental stress. Calling cops will escalate the situation. Kids become pretty stressed after being strip searched and thrown into a cell by themselves. That's the LAST thing a mentally-ill child needs to have happen.

JMO

Not necessarily this woman but there are a lot of parents that call the police when their child is having some kind of break down...in that moment, who do you call for an immediate response? Who?

 

[laura08]

Great article comfort dogs have arrived.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/...fter-school-massacre-20121216,0,7533873.story

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/17/comfort-dogs-arrive-in-ne_n_2316346.html#slide=more270293 pictures

 

[MyBelle]

I can fully understand her yearning for a connection. I can't understand trying to do it over something that could potentially be dangerous to her son and others. Whatever your stance on gun control, the simple fact us that guns are weapons and its questionable judgement to expose an unstable person to them. If he could not feel or express love for those closest to him then why in the world is he going to care about hurting strangers.
As much as I don't understand some of her choices I can't help but feel for her in the sense she was left to deal with this kids massive issues alone. The father hadn't spoken to AL or been involved in years. He slid away like he was coated with Teflon and started a new life with a new wife.

The mother had season tickets to ballgames and gardening was a hobby. I'd like to know why she decided to get involved with guns and target shooting rather than playing computer games with him. It seems to be an odd choice for an older woman who preferred to socialize, sailing and play games with her friends.

There is just too much information we don't know to make sense of all of this.

JMO

 

[ami]

I really hope LE will tell us what they have discovered about AL and his personality disorder and the clues they found. It's not about morbid curiosity, but about a real need to know what a human being could be feeling or thinking or experiencing that allows them to choose such heinous acts. It's terrifying to live in a world where people like him can have the freedom and impulse to do such things.

However after reading comments on facebook I despair of the entire human race today.

 

[gypsychild]

Not necessarily this woman but there are a lot of parents that call the police when their child is having some kind of break down...in that moment, who do you call for an immediate response? Who?

This woman wrote a blog entry with the name of a recent mass murderer and said she was his mother. She directly linked her son with AL. What kind of self esteem or strength or state of mind can that kid possibly be getting there? The more I think about what this woman did, the more it just sickens me.

 

[KMouse]

I'm going to toss this out to you guys...

I'm wondering if the cause could be bullying? Kids with Asperger's have been known to be bullied and when they are in middle school it's really bad for them. My son was miserable daily during that time in his life and I can't post the things the kids said to him in middle school cuz I'd have to give myself a time out for the language. Perhaps this burned something in his brain that he couldn't come to terms with...

It might also be the lack of inclusion. Kids that are different don't get invited to birthday parties. Kids don't come to their birthday parties. They don't play team sports. Life passing them by may cause the slow smoldering that someday explodes.

 

[laniefi]

The mother had season tickets to ballgames and gardening was a hobby. I'd like to know why she decided to get involved with guns and target shooting rather than playing computer games with him. It seems to be an odd choice for an older woman who preferred to socialize, sailing and play games with her friends.

There is just too much information we don't know to make sense of all of this.

JMO

BBM - and at the same time, not enough information....

 

[Kimster]

It was a concern for the school staff.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/15/adam-lanza-pain-loner-teacher_n_2308641.html

Mr Novia said he told the school's three security staffers who reported to him to carefully monitor the student and 'where he was, who he was with, and what he was doing'.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...babysitter-Never-turn-Adam.html#ixzz2FLSy8h9c

If the adults really kept such a careful eye on him it might have shielded him from physical bullying but there are other kinds that are more difficult to catch.

But then again, like Asperger's, plenty of bullied kids never hurt anyone.

If we're ever going to know why, I think we're probably going to find that the cause isn't any one thing, it's a combination of factors, a perfect storm that came together.

There was a principal at my son's school and he was toxic for Aspies. This is not my description, it was the county's description when I finally had to get them involved. He also called it "teasing" and used to say my son needed to learn how to deal with it. To me, it was like throwing a kid in a wheel chair on the ground.

 

[Darkman00]

How Ryan Lanza Reacted When TV Networks Incorrectly Named Him The Sandy Hook Shooter

Published : 46 min 41 sec ago

Friday morning began like any other work day for Ryan Lanza.

The 24-year-old Hoboken resident commuted into Ernst & Young's Times Square office. He has reportedly been a senior tax employee there for the past few years.

While at his desk, Lanza looked up at the TV and saw a report that he had allegedly killed 20 or more people at Sandy Hook elementary school.

Of course, this wasn't true.

His mother was also pronounced dead.

A co-worker recounted what happened next to MailOnline:

"Lanza quickly told his boss: 'I need to go,'" The Daily Mail reports. "He then walked out of his Times Square office. Thirty minutes later, New York Police stormed the office."

-------

Read more: http://www.newshour24.com/2012/12/1...orrectly-Named-Him-The-Sandy-Hook-Shooter.htm

 

[MyBelle]

Not necessarily this woman but there are a lot of parents that call the police when their child is having some kind of break down...in that moment, who do you call for an immediate response? Who?

When a person is ill, you call a rescue squad, not the cops.

JMO

 

[KMouse]

This woman wrote a blog entry with the name of a recent mass murderer and said she was his mother. She directly linked her son with AL. What kind of self esteem or strength or state of mind can that kid possibly be getting there? The more I think about what this woman did, the more it just sickens me.

I would never do that to my kid.
She's obvious needs a lot of help on many levels.

However, there are a lot of parents out there who are trying to cope, who are not coping well, and who do not know where to turn. A lot of those parents are isolated.

 

[Donjeta]

This woman wrote a blog entry with the name of a recent mass murderer and said she was his mother. She directly linked her son with AL. What kind of self esteem or strength or state of mind can that kid possibly be getting there? The more I think about what this woman did, the more it just sickens me.

Talk about stigmatized...Suppose a miracle happens and the child is cured of whatever is bothering them. He gets an education and goes to a job interview. Someone looks him up on the internet. Hey, his mom thinks he's a mass murderer.

Do you think he's going to get a job as an accountant?

 

[KMouse]

When a person is ill, you call a rescue squad, not the cops.

JMO

Where do you find such a "rescue squad"? There is no such thing where I live. You call the police. There isn't anybody else.

 

[Gruffin]

I think it is interesting that Columbine happened two days before the shooter's seventh birthday; he was then the same age as his victims were to be when shot, I don't know, maybe even attending class in the same rooms where he would murder ( I don't know what elementary school he went to). I think what happened--MOO--is that the perp was the sort of person who (at least when he has no better options or prospects) likes getting violent control over children with violence, torture, sexual assault, forcible sodomy, etc. Probably, I figure, in the first grade he spent much time fantasizing about using violence and torture on his fellow students, but he didn't really understand his controlling tendencies as being for control rather than (say) senseless murder. When Columbine happened, it caused him from imitation to interpret his nasty taste for torture and the other things rapacious males tend to ultimately want as a desire to slaughter children as in Columbine. Maybe Adam Lanza was withdrawn from an early age because he liked to fantasize about doing truly violent heinous things to his fellow classmates or similarly aged children? Perhaps it is normal for people fantasizing or planning the killing of children to not want to be around people much, just from the practical standpoint that if you are thinking about killing people, being around people might cause the sensitive of those around you to get a clue what you are about, contrary to your evil plans.

How exactly would psychologists or psychiatrists discriminate between a person who is withdrawn because he is, I don't know, naturally insanely shy or whatever they say is the cause, and a person who is withdrawn because he is a monster that feels he needs to remain in the dark to hide his monstrousness? I don't think they could, and nor do I think they do. Also, if he really did think of himself as a future child killer from a young age, I can imagine AL often might have made himself look weird in harmless ways by way of replacing disgust with sympathy, rather like Voldemort affecting stuttering before he revealed himself, which would make evaluating his mental nature that much more problematic. The irony is that probably a large percentage of withdrawn people, even crazily withdrawn people, are so because they are afraid of people like AL, so I really think it would be a bad mistake to make it seem that AL's violence arose from some sort of inborn tendency toward social isolation. Medicating withdrawn people may just make for fewer people wary of chld molesters and killers.

I'm guessing the reason he didn't go after high school kids as in Columbine was that his murderous fantasies got less fun when older, e.g., when in high school, probably because (which he didn't realize, apparently) the natural rapist part of him had for many years been trying to tell him the point of violence and torture is control rather than death and partly because he was more into violating younger more impressionable and helpless kids. He probably thought to get the most fun he would need for the murders to be as much as possible like they were when he fantasized about them in the first grade, when they were likely most fun to him. Probably he killed himself because of his cowardice at getting shot by police, but still I'd say his murdering wasn't as pleasant a reliving of his first-grade imaginings as he had expected, because the murders really were senseless, the product of a deluded confused mind.

Not that I blame the media for having made Columbine a well-known topic. Sure, if naturally bad child-torturers had a better more sensible understanding of their rapacious natures less influenced by the hype that the violent like to surround themselves with to make themselves more scary, there'd be fewer senseless mass murders. But it might make for more effective rapists, which we don't need either. Discussions of violence can have good and bad effects (for humanity) on the naturally bad, whether the discussions are enlightened or stupid. But the typical, basically decent person can gain some useful (for humanity) understanding by not ignoring evil when it is of interest, just as it is mostly good for him to study whatever else that interests him.

 

[Kmonci]

The mother had season tickets to ballgames and gardening was a hobby. I'd like to know why she decided to get involved with guns and target shooting rather than playing computer games with him. It seems to be an odd choice for an older woman who preferred to socialize, sailing and play games with her friends.

There is just too much information we don't know to make sense of all of this.

JMO

I agree. I feel like her love for him may have blinded her to certain things. Maybe that's why the father washed his hands of dealing with AL, perhaps he was more objective and she didn't want to accept it. I don't know. It seems like she may not have been well equipped to deal with the full scope of his issues. I read that they were researching colleges and the appropriate living situation for him. That seems out of touch with his state of declining mental health.