May 22: “take our children to the park and leave them there day”

[montana_16]

I swear to you I thought the title of this thread was sarcastic and meant in irony. Wow, just wow.

I'm not as dumb as this sounds, but when I first saw the title I thought it was aimed at anyone holding missing children that they could take them to any park and release them. Like the Safe Haven law.

 

[txsvicki]

This woman is probably just finding a way to make money by selling a book and has no intention of leaving small children to play. She wouldn't even let free range chickens out to roam if a bunch of wolves and coyotes regularly circled the area. Every neighborhood has some sex offenders on the list circling most parks, and no telling how many perverted relatives of kids hanging around parks, plus some kids act out sexually with each other. My daughter says that over in the "good" part of town young moms left little two year old toddlers alone while they jogged around the park quite a ways from the kids, but I see parents closely watching theirs over in the "bad" part of town. It takes all kinds I guess.

 

[kbl8201]

I'm not as dumb as this sounds, but when I first saw the title I thought it was aimed at anyone holding missing children that they could take them to any park and release them. Like the Safe Haven law.

i think thats only in california :waitasec:

 

[6angels]

I wish I lived near the park or had the money to fly down for a day. I'd sit at the park and watch and make sure all the children are safe. She has basically invited something bad to happen to her or any other children being left there for the day. :-(

 

[BeenaBobba]

Out of curiosity, are there statistics showing that stranger abductions and stranger sexual abuse have increased in the past fifty years, or has the media just gotten better at raising public awareness when bad things happen? From what I've read, stranger abductions and stranger sexual abuse are kind of rare compared to abductions/sexual abuse by someone children know. Sadly, if you go by statistics alone, children are probably safer in the park than they are around people they know. My parents were raised free range, and I was raised that way, too. If statistics haven't really changed since the days of my childhood, then I don't see the harm in raising children free range (within reason). I think children should be taught safety measures and self-defense so that they can better be prepared in the (honestly, kind of rare) event that a creepy stranger approaches them.

 

[sleuthin4fun]

It is a sad thing that it is no longer safe for children to be "free range". I grew up in the suburbs of Washington D.C. in the 70's. Life was good. We went out in the mornings and didn't really come home until dusk. We build forts in the woods, went fishing, walked for pizza or ice cream, played kick ball ect...... What great memories of that I have. As my children have grown it has saddened me that they could not experience that freedom. I have tried to allow what I felt I could safely but always with great caution.

 

[BeenaBobba]

It is a sad thing that it is no longer safe for children to be "free range". I grew up in the suburbs of Washington D.C. in the 70's. Life was good. We went out in the mornings and didn't really come home until dusk. We build forts in the woods, went fishing, walked for pizza or ice cream, played kick ball ect...... What great memories of that I have. As my children have grown it has saddened me that they could not experience that freedom. I have tried to allow what I felt I could safely but always with great caution.

I hear you, but truthfully, statistics show that crime rates have actually gone down as low as they were in the 70s. I grew up in the 80s and 90s as a free range kid, and statistically speaking, kids would be safer now than I was back then.

It's kind of sad because you never see gangs of kids running around neighborhoods anymore. Instead, they're all inside watching TV, surfing the web, etc. Not to get too OT, but I think that's part of the reason why childhood obesity is such a big problem these days.

 

[rpipergirl]

When I was a kid in the 70s/80s, the only rule in the house was to be back before dark. We would leave after breakfast (I'm thinking weekends and summers) and stay out all day. I suppose we came home for lunch, but I remember being in the park when the sun was setting and realizing it was time to run home.

I'm not that lenient, but I don't hover, either. I hope I'm somewhere in between. I'm strict about some things, like my kids going to other people's houses. But as far as going to the park or roaming the neighborhood to play (although they're getting old for that now), that's fine with me. I'm less worried aobut something happening to them in the neighborhood or park than I am at someone's house.​

Me too. I was born in 1974. We were outside all day. All we were asked was stay with the range of our parents voices. I grew in a neighborhood that truly went by "It takes a village to raise a child." mantra. All the moms kept their eyes out the windows even when we didn't think anyone was watching. We were allowed to go in any one of the 3 apartment building in our driveway as long as we told our folks who's house we were in. If we had to use the bathroom we ran into the nearest apartment. They were all open to us. Most kids today aren't growing up like that,unfortunately.

 

[Charlie09]

I am the only parent in my little neighborhood that doesn't let my kid go out front to play. (And we have an RSO right down the street) There are up to 15 kids out there that play with no parental involvement or oversight. Sheesh, there are two girls 8 and 10 that their mom leaves them outside and leaves. Most have siblings, but mine doesn't. I just don't trust her to make the right choices, if there was a stranger that came through looking for a puppy, or asking for directions, or whatever. She'd be right there to help.

Seriously, what am I doing to harm her by being overprotective? I am keeping her from the bottom of the dogpile with 13 year old boys on top of her, I am keeping her inside unless I am outside, and when friends can they come in here, instead of her being where I don't know who else may be visiting.

Samantha Runyon is all I have to think about to stay protective.

 

[Angels_Not_Forgotten]

Oh the dilemma's of parenting Honestly, I was out all day, every day, and my "older" (by only 18 months mind you) brother had to go with me if we *gasp* rode our bikes across town during the day at 5. BUT, i also did NOT have the things my son has growing up, like:

Homework every monday thru thursday, good gracious, I think it was third grade when I had homework??

Activities, He does hip hop dance, we do bible study, he also does karate, two classes a week.

He goes to a magnet school so his hours are 9ish to 3ish, so it's not like he sits around the house and does nothing. I just think that over all, the kids have a lot more going on than then, as well. Just my opinion. and that stated, my son is 5 and he is JUST now being able to play in the back yard only with us not out there. but really, i'm outside with him most of the time because, well, why not? beautiful days are upon us! But we don't really play out front. No need to really, no cars around back!

 

[Mr. E]

Another thing I did back in the day was walk to school. It wasn't a short walk, either, but I did not like riding the bus. I used to cut through the woods, too. The last time I visited my old hometown, the woods had been mostly cleared away. Sad...

I would not let my kids walk to school. There is just not a safe way to do it here, as there are highways to cross and no sidewalks. They don't ride the bus, either (well, the one who is currently in school doesn't), so we have to drop off and pick up every day.

 

[LadyL]

so she's all for pushing her burden off on random strangers

if we put aside the chance of abduction/rape/murder, there's a zillion other accidental things that could go wrong

if we take it further and put aside both harm and accident, there's still the issue of kids needing guidance and supervision

she is abdicating her parental responsibility

sorry sweetheart - you made the choice to have sex, give birth, and raise a child

that means you - not me, not your neighbours, and certainly not random strangers

those of us with a moral conscience couldn't just walk away and leave children unattended and she knows that, which is why she's comfortable doing it - she's relying on the kindness of strangers to take on her mothering duty

and she'd probably be the first one to press charges if a stranger did something she considered inappropriate while supervising her kid in the park

sounds like a social experiment to me, either that or she's completely loopy

has the potential to be a social experiement gone horribly wrong if ya ask me

'course maybe she's thinking there will be cameras there and all the reporters can babysit for free

 

[Mr. E]

LadyL, I see what you're saying. Accidents do happen. But you can't watch your kids 24/7. What's the middle ground?

I can think of tons of times I skinned my knee or got a bee sting when I was out and about as a child. Once I think I almost passed out from heat stroke when I was riding my bike from the downtown library to my house.

My sister was hurt seriously when she was riding her bike at age 12 (she was crossing a highway).

A few years ago my daughter, who was I guess about 10 at the time, went out to play in the neighborhood. It was afternoon, but as it started to get dark I became worried. I got in the car and drove around the neighborhood looking for her. She was just caught up in a game with some friends.

So things do happen, obviously. What's the acceptable middle ground between negligent parent and helicopter parent?

 

[legalmania]

If they get tired of the park, send them on a plane to Russia as this mother did to her seven year old adopted son.

http://www.earthtimes.org/articles/...-sends-adopted-son-back-to-russia--alone.html

 

[legalmania]

I'm not as dumb as this sounds, but when I first saw the title I thought it was aimed at anyone holding missing children that they could take them to any park and release them. Like the Safe Haven law.

Actually that sounds like a good law. Most likely though the pedophiles would think it's a trap.

 

[Sleuthster]

She is crazy!!!!

My sedements exactly.

 

[2sisters]

LadyL, I see what you're saying. Accidents do happen. But you can't watch your kids 24/7. What's the middle ground?

I can think of tons of times I skinned my knee or got a bee sting when I was out and about as a child. Once I think I almost passed out from heat stroke when I was riding my bike from the downtown library to my house.

My sister was hurt seriously when she was riding her bike at age 12 (she was crossing a highway).

A few years ago my daughter, who was I guess about 10 at the time, went out to play in the neighborhood. It was afternoon, but as it started to get dark I became worried. I got in the car and drove around the neighborhood looking for her. She was just caught up in a game with some friends.

So things do happen, obviously. What's the acceptable middle ground between negligent parent and helicopter parent?

Hard to say because kids get seriously injured under a parents watch as well. Accidents happen with or without a parent watching.

 

[southcitymom]

Haven't read all of this thread, but I'm a huge fan of this woman and free range parenting. After my kids (7 and 9) and I got home from church, we had some lunch and then they disappeared around noonish......from time to time, they would pop back in with various other free range children, but they didn't show back up for good until 6 or so for dinner and wind-down time.

It sounds like they spent most of their day playing in an enormous magnolia tree they found...at some point they hooked up with some other kids and there was a lemonade stand.....a couple of their friends were drenched, so I think water sports were also enjoyed. My neighborhood is fairly spread out, but I'm sure they covered miles on foot, scooters, bikes and skateboards.

I never worried for a minute. And I don't live on a tiny island in the middle of the ocean free of crime. I live just a few miles north of Atlanta, Georgia. I don't think we live in different times - I think we are drenched by a 24/7 news cycle that makes us scared of our own shadows.

I'm not scared, so I can't teach my children to be scared. I want them to have their own freedom, struggles and adventures without me there to manage every little thing. I want them to play all day and forget about anything less interesting than their own imaginations. All due respect to parents who feel otherwise.

 

[southcitymom]

It really hasn't changed all that much. Back "when" there was just as much danger for children as there is now, but "then" there wasn't much publicity, etc. to bring more awareness to the issue.

Public awareness, media coverage... that's what has changed.

I couldn't agree with you more, Magic Roses. Nothing has changed! We didn't live in the "good old days" that are long gone. We're just (if we choose to listen to such junk) inundated with a 24/7, if-it-bleeds-it-leads news schedule.

Blech! Free range all the way for me!

 

[southcitymom]

how about 'leave this unfit mother and her lousy writing skills at the park' day

You can send her to my house instead! I think she's brilliant!