Who Is Terri Horman?

[Zephyr]

Well from what we have seen and heard so far, I'm not sure if Terri Horman really knows who Terri Horman is.

I think I should have said Terri Horman can't decide who Terri Horman is.

I agree. And if she wants to know more about who she is, biologically, I think it's safe to say she's effectively negated any possibility of that ever happening. Her biological parents will never acknowledge her now.

Just my opinion.

 

[DreamyEye]

Tink56, thanks for clarifying your post, and for your thoughtfulness in addressing my concern. I will be the first to admit that I am probably overly sensitive about the only child thing. I didn't mean to take you to task so much as to present a different view of onlies, and start making it known that due to cultural biases, onlies often find themselves in an "I can't win for losing" situation.

I used to take "only child" comments in stride and pretty much ignored them rather than trying to address them. But I've recently come to realize via goings-on in the extended family that there are still a lot of negative attitudes toward onlies expressed on a daily basis. Now there are more households with an only within my extended family, and these kids are being treated in the same way that I was. It makes me want to contribute to the defense of onlies for their sake ... for the sake of all young onlies, whoever and wherever they may be.

I have read many of your posts on Kyron's case and think for the most part you are right on the money. When it comes to wanting to figure out TH in order to learn what it would take to get Kryon home, I think we are all united.

 

[Aedrys]

I think Terri Horman is who she wants to be when she wants to be how she wants to be. I don't think there's one Terri Horman. I think there's a different Terri Horman for every person she talks to. I think she just reflects what she thinks is appropriate for the situation at that moment. She doesn't think ahead and that's obvious because of so many inconsistencies on her part. I think Terri Horman is constant mystery even to Terri Horman, and she may never truly know who she is. Even more scary, I don't think Terri Horman wants to know the real Terri Horman. She'd rather be the Terri Horman she has built herself up in her mind to be or whatever Terri Horman is most appropriate for the situation at hand.

 

[mmmagique]

Snipped.

Attributing character flaws to the fact that someone is an only child is a form of prejudice similar to discrimination on the basis of sex or race. You are pretty much saying that a person was doomed to be flawed in a certain way due to a circumstances of birth over which he or she had no control.

A lot of research has been done on birth order, including surveys of whether or not there's any statistical support for popular notions about only children--that they are spoiled, selfish, doted on, put on pedestals, or highly disrespectful of others. None of these "character flaws" are found to be any more prevalent among only children than among any other group of children.

In birth order dynamics, an only child is 75% similar to an eldest child and 25% similar to a youngest child. A popular misperception about onlies is that they are mostly born to parents who actually wanted more children and feel so blessed to have had at least one that the child becomes the center of their world. Actually, onlies are also born to parents who never intended to have any children at all, but who declined to abort an unplanned pregnancy. Another segment of onlies are born to single mothers who never go on to marry or have other children, and these kids sometimes grow up feeling overly responsible for their single moms. Another group were born to mothers who underwent dangerous or very difficult pregnancies or deliveries, and these kids sometimes harbor a secret guilt over their belief (sometimes encouraged by the family) that they nearly killed their mothers simply by coming into existence. All told, it's not a significant majority of only children who are born to happy, grateful, well-to-do households.

I am an only child now 57 years old. I took care of my mother for 18 years, and my father for 9 years. When the parents of onlies age and lapse into frail health, there is only one child to care for them.

I grew up in a large extended family in which all the other branches had 2, 3, or 4 children. Only children were absolutely loathed in this family, and I grew up hearing all about my endless shopping list of character flaws caused by my own personal failure to have siblings. When I was a kid, if I fought with my cousins, I was spoiled and selfish and a bully who expected to get my way at all times. But if I didn't stand up for my rights and defend myself, I was weak-minded and weak-bodied because I never had to fight for anything and expected everything to be handed for me. If I valued my things, I had never learned to share due to being an only ... but if I tried to be generous, I was trying to buy affection because I lacked social skills due to be an only. It was just endless, until finally, when I was grown up to have a say, I quit having anything to do with these people entirely.

I ended up working for a sole propriator business for nearly twenty years. After fifteen years of employment, the owner finally confessed to me: I could probably sue her for this, but had I told her before being hired that I was an only, she would never have hired me. So she was glad I never told her, because I was the best employee she had ever hired and we became the best of friends.

For the record, I never sued her, spoiled rotten brat that I am.

As for TH being an only or an adoptee ... let's keep in mind that these are decisions that she wasn't at liberty to make about her own life. I believe she is guilty for whatever happened to Kyron ... but my belief is based on her own decisions and actions ... not on decisions that her bio-parents or adoptive parents made for her.

She can refuse to hire you or even fire you because she doesn't like what color shirt you wear or where you buy your makeup.

There are only a few "illegal prejudices" to have in the workplace; race, color, religion, sex, national origin, age and disabilities.
Right or wrong, she can (if she so chooses) hire only the middle born child if that's what she so desires. Or, she can hire first and second borns and only promote first borns.

 

[mmmagique]

Someone who keeps receipts and accurate records of where she is at 9:12 but can't be accurate about where she was for about an hour and half after that.

"I have a receipt showing I was checking out at Fred Meyer 7 miles away at 9:12am. I went to another FM looking for meds for K they didn't have at the first FM. Then I was trying to get K to sleep in the truck for a few minutes, but no go, so off to the gym at 11:20. Out at 12:20. Home at 12:45. Kaine home at 2. Bus at 3:30. That was my day - they keep asking me. Now on my 5th interview with them."

http://www.komonews.com/news/local/100415079.html

Interesting observation!!

 

[mmmagique]

Who is Terri Horman?

Complex
Clever
Secretive
Manipulative
Sexually out-going
Charming at times
"different" (when speaking to her you may get an "off" vibe, but you may not be able to put your finger on what exactly you're picking up on)
A Man's Lady (not many women friends, nor close friendships, but lots of men on the side)
Chameleon like
Angry
Bitter
Jealous
Grasping
Selfish

If she did what she's accused of doing, she reminds me of a song "...if she doesn't scare you, no evil thing will..."

 

[DreamyEye]

Mmmagique, re: my boss ... it was she who said that I probably could have sued her. Of course I did not--it never even crossed my mind. The comment about suing was her opening to her confession that had she known I was an only, she would never have hired me. By the time I found out she felt that way about onlies, I was already working for her and we were both happy with the arrangement.

 

[DreamyEye]

I don't know whether Terri has always been this way or if she has become unhinged at some point in her adult life, but what I see is a person who is out of control--but doesn't seem to realize it herself. The sext messaging--when she knew that the eyes of the world were upon her just suggests to me a person who can't stop herself. Her drinking would be another example. There are possibly other addictions--Interneting and online gaming. Not that those things are bad behaviors in themselves ... but it's been suggested that she spent an awful lot of time doing these things.

What I saw (and posted on another thread) when putting pieces together was that she had sent her older son to live elsewhere, and "got rid of him." Then she tried to hire the landscaper to murder Kaine, and tried to "get rid of him." Then Kyron disappeared, and if Terri is responsible for that, then she "got rid of" Kyron. What seemed to be driving her behavior was a bizarre desire to "get rid of" members of her family.

And honestly? Despite the fact that she seems very cavalier about Kyron's disappearance and Kaine getting the RO against her, and her losing custody of baby K, it wouldn't surprise me a bit if one of the family members Terri would like to "get rid of" is herself. In addition to being so very damaging to others, a lot of her behavior has been downright self-destructive. I would say that at the very least, this is a person who is way out of touch with herself.

 

[mmmagique]

I don't know whether Terri has always been this way or if she has become unhinged at some point in her adult life, but what I see is a person who is out of control--but doesn't seem to realize it herself. The sext messaging--when she knew that the eyes of the world were upon her just suggests to me a person who can't stop herself. Her drinking would be another example. There are possibly other addictions--Interneting and online gaming. Not that those things are bad behaviors in themselves ... but it's been suggested that she spent an awful lot of time doing these things.

What I saw (and posted on another thread) when putting pieces together was that she had sent her older son to live elsewhere, and "got rid of him." Then she tried to hire the landscaper to murder Kaine, and tried to "get rid of him." Then Kyron disappeared, and if Terri is responsible for that, then she "got rid of" Kyron. What seemed to be driving her behavior was a bizarre desire to "get rid of" members of her family.

And honestly? Despite the fact that she seems very cavalier about Kyron's disappearance and Kaine getting the RO against her, and her losing custody of baby K, it wouldn't surprise me a bit if one of the family members Terri would like to "get rid of" is herself. In addition to being so very damaging to others, a lot of her behavior has been downright self-destructive. I would say that at the very least, this is a person who is way out of touch with herself.

I agree with everything except for the last paragraph. I don't think she would ever "get rid" of herself.
Why get rid of the thing you love the most?

 

[human]

Mmmagique, re: my boss ... it was she who said that I probably could have sued her. Of course I did not--it never even crossed my mind. The comment about suing was her opening to her confession that had she known I was an only, she would never have hired me. By the time I found out she felt that way about onlies, I was already working for her and we were both happy with the arrangement.

totally O/T, but mmagique is correct. Only people in a protected class can sue for not being hired or fired, unless one has a contract that has protections in it that state otherwise.

 

[Beatrice]

http://www.komonews.com/news/local/100415079.html

Terri Horman went on to talk about her missing stepson's recent behavior:

"The past 2 weeks he's been acting really weird. Staring off into space. Can't remember anything. Walks into the room and then back out, stopping to stare and then move on. The doc thinks that he is having mini seizures and I made an appt on Thursday for next Friday to have him checked out."

What does this behavior have to do with a missing child?

To me, this describes a little boy who is about to confront his step mother with the truth....

 

[mmmagique]

Terri Horman went on to talk about her missing stepson's recent behavior:

"The past 2 weeks he's been acting really weird. Staring off into space. Can't remember anything. Walks into the room and then back out, stopping to stare and then move on. The doc thinks that he is having mini seizures and I made an appt on Thursday for next Friday to have him checked out."

What does this behavior have to do with a missing child?

To me, this describes a little boy who is about to confront his step mother with the truth....

I believe that's what's called staging. Or if it's a novel, foreshadowing. (although it was described after, so...maybe not!)

But anyway, it was something that Terri thought would sound good at the time. Lucky for us she didn't have a high-priced lawyer back then making her keep her mouth shut!

 

[Aedrys]

Terri Horman went on to talk about her missing stepson's recent behavior:

"The past 2 weeks he's been acting really weird. Staring off into space. Can't remember anything. Walks into the room and then back out, stopping to stare and then move on. The doc thinks that he is having mini seizures and I made an appt on Thursday for next Friday to have him checked out."

What does this behavior have to do with a missing child?

To me, this describes a little boy who is about to confront his step mother with the truth....

To me, this describes a woman blaming a little boy for his own disappearance. See, it wasn't my fault, I was watching him, it was his fault. He was the one that made himself disappear, not me. He was the one having serious problems. He was the one that just wandered off himself or went off with someone by himself. Kyron is to blame for what happened to Kyron.

Anyone that would blame a child for their own disappearance is just despicable. Thank God Kaine and Desiree are there to be Kyron's voice and defend him against Terri when he can't.

 

[Beatrice]

Terri Horman seems to have alot of addictions....

Alcohol, sex, exercise, power, contol...The need to be perfect.

IMO...If her secrets are uncovered...Maybe Kyron will be found there.

"We are only as sick as our secrets."

I think Terri was doing phone sex for a while.

She seems to be in constant competition with Desiree.
She wanted to hurt Kaine in the worst way possible.

If she had not been ousted from the family home...I wonder what her daily activities would be....

 

[Beatrice]

Again, we see the Sociopathic Personality...

http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html

 

[cluciano63]

What I don't understand is Terri asking Desiree to try to get custody of Kyron, or to take him back ,whatever Desiree said.

It doesn't really fit with everything else presumed about her. If she was in such competetition with Desiree, why would she wave the white flag about Kyron? I wish Desiree had said more about this, the context, etc...

 

[Aedrys]

What I don't understand is Terri asking Desiree to try to get custody of Kyron, or to take him back ,whatever Desiree said.

It doesn't really fit with everything else presumed about her. If she was in such competetition with Desiree, why would she wave the white flag about Kyron? I wish Desiree had said more about this, the context, etc...

Because it seems Terri's first instinct is to get rid of whatever is making her life hard or is not making her happy. She got rid of her son, sent him to live elsewhere. Maybe she thought she could avoid hurting Kyron if his mom were take him away for good. Then it would just be her and Kaine. I think she had this fantasy of convincing Desiree to take her son back for good, but of course, in the real world, it wouldn't work that way. Kaine would still want visitation. Kyron would still visit.

I think that was an early, easy out for her, or so she thought. But when Kaine put his foot down, and Desiree went with it, she saw that the only choice she had was to take matters into her own hands. She's like Casey Anthony, try to get someone else to take care of the problem first, and then if they won't, the last resort is to get rid of the problem firsthand.

 

[stmarysmead]

What I don't understand is Terri asking Desiree to try to get custody of Kyron, or to take him back ,whatever Desiree said.

It doesn't really fit with everything else presumed about her. If she was in such competetition with Desiree, why would she wave the white flag about Kyron? I wish Desiree had said more about this, the context, etc...

Terri sent her son away while Kaine was on a trip. Maybe...during another absence of Kaine's, she decided to get Kyron out of the house too. She has Kyron call his Mother, upset, to talk to her. Desiree agrees that Kyron should come live with her.

Mission accomplished..or so Terri thinks. But then Kaine comes home and after being blindsided by this...says no...he's not giving up custody of his son. Forget it!

Terri would then be seething. Next time she decides, Kyron will go somewhere where Kaine cannot bring him back from. (that could be the worst case scenario or the "stashing")

This might explain why the parents believed he was "stashed." They might be aware that Terri was angling every which way for quite some time...to get Kyron out of the house. They might have taken some comfort in this.

Then, it would be just Kaine, Terri, and their Baby.

 

[mmmagique]

Terri Horman seems to have alot of addictions....

Alcohol, sex, exercise, power, contol...The need to be perfect.

IMO...If her secrets are uncovered...Maybe Kyron will be found there.

"We are only as sick as our secrets."

I think Terri was doing phone sex for a while.

She seems to be in constant competition with Desiree.
She wanted to hurt Kaine in the worst way possible.

If she had not been ousted from the family home...I wonder what her daily activities would be....

Why do you think Terri was doing phone sex?

 

[Chablis]

Why do you think Terri was doing phone sex?

Probably because of her texts she sounds like a "pro"


I also don't think it helped the situation that Kyron is the spitting image of Desiree, I am sure that incensed Terri on some level, a constant reminder of Desiree.