Cox Family Press Conference - 15 Feb 2010

[sunnydee]

Although I'm personally am not a religious person, I do not think it was an odd expecatation that Susan had that her husband would return to his previous church membership as a criterion for her to stay within the marriage. Obviously, he has the right to say he is not interested. They were married in a religion which has certain beliefs about marriage, and although some people feel it is wrong for Susan to expect Josh to be active in their Church, that is the person she committed herself to. If Josh has grown apart - then she has the right to say that she is not going to stay in the marriage. (In my opinion there were many other reasons to leave)

Its not unlike a person who has a partner who has been unfaithful to them. Would their expectation not to cheat on them be considered setting goals for the other person? Or would it be setting your own personal boundary and stating that I will not stand by you if you continue to betray me.

I think everyone establishes their own boundaries for what is acceptable to them in a relationship, so if they are stating that another person's behavior is causing them to reconsider being with them then I think it is a fair call to make to tell the person what they expect from them.

The other person may not like having standards impose on them, and if they are not willing to live up to those standards then I think they should be ready to move on to another relationship that is more conducive to their lifestyle.

 

[grayjay]

Yes, they should move on. Not dig in and figure out a way so that one spouse takes everything.

 

[sunnydee]

New story breaking - a body was found in Utah County by hikers

http://connect2utah.com/content/news/story/?cid=76782

Not much details yet.

link about hobble creek (location where the body was found)

http://www.wildernessutah.com/adventure/hobblecreek.html

 

[rd_jfc]

Note that Right Fork is in a national forest.

rd

 

[TGIRecovered]

New story breaking - a body was found in Utah County by hikers

http://connect2utah.com/content/news/story/?cid=76782

Not much details yet.

link about hobble creek (location where the body was found)

http://www.wildernessutah.com/adventure/hobblecreek.html

Want to start a new thread sunnydee? You could make it clear in the title that it may or may not be Susan. (Maybe something like, "Unidentified body found, Utah County"). Even if it turns out to be someone else, having it on a seperate thread will help prevent confusion and double posting from people discovering the story later tonight and tomorrow. Just a suggestion!

 

[Dr. Know?]

I posted the article in the wrong thread. But via Google maps it's about 58 miles from where Susan lived.

 

[sunnydee]

TGI Recovered - I'm new here, and don't know how to start a new thread

 

[rd_jfc]

even better moderators could split the thead ar sunnydee's post.

 

[SuziQ]

I will start a thread. I came here to post about this anyways.

Give me a minute or two.

 

[PickieChickie]

New story breaking - a body was found in Utah County by hikers

http://connect2utah.com/content/news/story/?cid=76782

Not much details yet.

link about hobble creek (location where the body was found)

http://www.wildernessutah.com/adventure/hobblecreek.html

Shelby Chissus Gifford
Per WVCPD, body found near Provo is NOT Susan. Thanks for your love, concern and support for the Cox family and Susan's friends.

 

[hollyblue]

She said she was going through with the divorce unless JP was <insert some Mormon term here> by just about now.

That sounds like a pretty firm goal to me. And it's why she has disappeared.

She became inconvenient.

rd

That sounds more like an ultimatum, rather than a goal on working on your marriage. Ultimatum -vs-negotiation.
Big difference. Ask the Iranians......just sayin

 

[hollyblue]

There may be something to that, but JP's mom is the one that "ran away" to Utah from Washington, taking the eldest daughter. So not such a cut-n-dried parallel to SP's life.

IIRC Jen did not move to Utah until after she was 18. She would have been close to this age when the divorce started...and went on for 10 years.

With having said that, I think we can see the *damage done* toward the other children by the controlling father.

 

[hollyblue]

Actually, there was an interview with a neighbor (Tim) that said Josh had some concerns about the Joseph Smith story (after hearing of the multiple and changing versions of Smith's first vision, if I recall correctly), that caused him to stop believing in the LDS Church teachings several years prior.

I don't recall that, specifically RayO. I know it was mentioned that the father sent anti-Mormon literature to Josh.

 

[hollyblue]

Although I'm personally am not a religious person, I do not think it was an odd expectation that Susan had that her husband would return to his previous church membership as a criterion for her to stay within the marriage. Obviously, he has the right to say he is not interested. They were married in a religion which has certain beliefs about marriage, and although some people feel it is wrong for Susan to expect Josh to be active in their Church, that is the person she committed herself to. If Josh has grown apart - then she has the right to say that she is not going to stay in the marriage. (In my opinion there were many other reasons to leave)

Its not unlike a person who has a partner who has been unfaithful to them. Would their expectation not to cheat on them be considered setting goals for the other person? Or would it be setting your own personal boundary and stating that I will not stand by you if you continue to betray me.

I think everyone establishes their own boundaries for what is acceptable to them in a relationship, so if they are stating that another person's behavior is causing them to reconsider being with them then I think it is a fair call to make to tell the person what they expect from them.

The other person may not like having standards impose on them, and if they are not willing to live up to those standards then I think they should be ready to move on to another relationship that is more conducive to their lifestyle.

ITA sunnydee. In the very beginning when I heard of the conflict between the two, I thought how expectations were not being met. It happens in marriages all the time. People change, and sometimes they are no longer headed down the same path. This was unsettling to Susan, although, in my view....he had other problems that she should have left him on before that even came into being. I think Josh pushed and pushed and kept pushing because he felt *better* about himself when he had that power over her. When she finally got on her feet and got in his face, along with the perceived help from the church. He became unglued.

 

[RayO]

I don't recall that, specifically RayO. I know it was mentioned that the father sent anti-Mormon literature to Josh.

I am pretty sure I saw that mentioned, but in any event the issue with JP's belief in the LDS Church teachings was not a recent event.

 

[PickieChickie]

I am pretty sure I saw that mentioned, but in any event the issue with JP's belief in the LDS Church teachings was not a recent event.

If JP has a problem believing the teachings of the LDS - Mormon church, why is he taking Charlie and Braden to the LDS - Mormon church? Does he expect the members of the Puyallup church to rally around him as the West Valley City members did? Or, is he just trying to look good?

 

[RubyRed]

If JP has a problem believing the teachings of the LDS - Mormon church, why is he taking Charlie and Braden to the LDS - Mormon church? Does he expect the members of the Puyallup church to rally around him as the West Valley City members did? Or, is he just trying to look good?

bbm ...Trying to look good and he needed their help unloading the moving truck.
Basically, he is just using them , for his own selfish reasons.

 

[RayO]

If JP has a problem believing the teachings of the LDS - Mormon church, why is he taking Charlie and Braden to the LDS - Mormon church? Does he expect the members of the Puyallup church to rally around him as the West Valley City members did? Or, is he just trying to look good?

I can only guess and relate based on what I learned after living there. There are a number of people who still attend some LDS services who have lost the faith after learning any of a number of verifiable facts surrounding the church that you'll never hear from the church itself. Some are there because they are accustomed to the life discipline and social system - its what they grew up with - or they continue at a minimal level for the sake of their spouse who still is a "true believer". Others might be there to take advantage of the social system.

Also, in some parts of the state leaving the church could be business suicide. Not so much in SLC metro, though.

 

[hollyblue]

[/B]

bbm ...Trying to look good and he needed their help unloading the moving truck.
Basically, he is just using them , for his own selfish reasons.

Right. I think it's all an act and a ruse to "look good" for the bennies the church can provide. Especially the *look what a good father I am making sure my children are in a church environment*. Josh is manipulating and planning for the future fight of the boys IMO. The only good thing, the boys are getting socialization from it and people with caring hearts looking out for them.

 

[PickieChickie]

Right. I think it's all an act and a ruse to "look good" for the bennies the church can provide. Especially the *look what a good father I am making sure my children are in a church environment*. Josh is manipulating and planning for the future fight of the boys IMO. The only good thing, the boys are getting socialization from it and people with caring hearts looking out for them.

One lady wrote me a FB message after JP first arrived in Washington telling me how uncomfortable it made her feel when JP brought the boys to church in Puyallup, that he was near her and he just gave her the creeps!