GUILTY MO - Tyler Dasher, 1, Affton, 15 Nov 2011 - #2

[Quiche]

Dear God, please let Tyler have been gone and in a much better place before his body was thrown out alone in the cold.

You know, I've been thinking about his quite a bit. It seems to me that there would be a Muder1 charge if he'd still been alive at the cemetery, right? Certainly the heat of the moment was over and she was in another state-- one of calculating what to do next. We have a 2nd degree charge, so I'm going to hang onto the hope that this is part of the reason why. mo

 

[Disguiseduser0308]

Thanks. This makes sense.

No problem, Carriebean! We may not like it at the moment, but she does have constitutional rights. Sounds like she's going to try to get herself the best deal (as most criminals do) and then plead guilty. Least, that's what I'm hoping for.

 

[Amster]

How do you propose we prevent these things from happening if we don't try to understand it?

Understand what?? Selfish woman throws a fit and kills her baby....good luck to those who want to find an excuse....in the meantime, lock this evil person up and keep her away from any more victims!! Tyler didn't "understand" as she was bashing his tiny skull in, I bet.

 

[Disguiseduser0308]

Based on Nurse's link above, it looks like the judge entered the not guilty plea on her behalf since she had no counsel present in court. Now that she has been assigned a public defender, I imagine she'll take a plea.

I'm not sure I agree the plea was solely based on SD not having counsel present. The judge is making sure her constitutional rights are protected. Her counsel will work with prosecutors for a deal. I think it's pretty typical that people plead NG at an arraignment.

 

[CarrieBean]

Understand what?? Selfish woman throws a fit and kills her baby....good luck to those who want to find an excuse....in the meantime, lock this evil person up and keep her away from any more victims!! Tyler didn't "understand" as she was bashing his tiny skull in, I bet.

Maybe you could go back and read my post again, because I'm pretty sure you misunderstood it. I said nothing about finding an excuse. I would certainly prefer prevention over dead babies.

 

[Boodles]

Based on Nurse's link above, it looks like the judge entered the not guilty plea on her behalf since she had no counsel present in court. Now that she has been assigned a public defender, I imagine she'll take a plea.

Right. It doesn't say she pleaded not guilty. It says the judge entered a plea of not guilty.

But now that she has a public defender appointed, who knows? Hopefully, they will do the right thing and admit to the murder.

But she doesn't need to get a plea deal. She confessed and they need to take this all the way - with a punishment to the full extent allowed under the law. Killing your kid is not acceptable. And forget this "stress of having a baby" excuse....she was pissed that the baby got in the way of her sleep after her 2:30AM bedtime.

And I do not accept the request that I suppress my anger. BS. We should be angry about this. What's the alternative, being passive? No way. Just like the Penn State incidents. These people cannot be allowed to behave this way and get away with it. Outrageous behavior deserves a commensurate punishment. No excuses. Victim's rights seem to be getting lost in our justice system these days......

 

[dog.gone.cute]

OMG...CA sure didn't receive a harsh sentence for what she did....how many babies have been killed since she was treated so kindly? There needs to be HARSHER consequences for killing babies!! Not coddling and "understanding"....I need a break.

BBM: I totally agree ... and while I totally understand that many do NOT want to hear about Casey Anthony --

IMO, what happened in that case IS -- and WILL continue -- to have an effect on how "mothers" who kill their children THINK they can GET OUT OF IT -- UNLESS -- SOMETHING is done to STOP the senseless murders of "mothers" killing their children !

Since CA was found "not guilty" in early July 2011, I have followed several cases of missing babies/toddlers -- and ALL of the ones I have followed IMO I believe the MOTHER did it ! MOO !

Thank God, Tyler was found so soon and his killer is in jail ! I hope this baby will receive JUSTICE ... and I hope they "throw the book at SD" !

I fear that so many of these "missing" and unfortunately, probably deceased children who may never be found, will NEVER receive JUSTICE ... and their "killers" will get away with murder !

MOO ...

:furious::furious::furious:

 

[JoeFromLB]

Oh man .. Little Tyler .. you deserved soooo much more. Sooooooo sooooooooo much more ...

Sleep with the angels, little guy.

 

[Ronso]

At the risk of sounding pretentious....

I am a mother of 4 (and a half if you count the bean I'm currently growing lol)...

Having ONE baby was easy. I remember being able to sleep in, get naps, play to my little hearts content with her. She was an easy baby I thought... that or one just wasn't enough to stress me out.

Things didn't get hard until number 2 came along, and even then it wasn't so much as they were hard but that I had to adjust. But even with two, it was still easier to get a nap and keep them on a similar schedule.

But once number 3 came along, forget naps. Forget anything but sleeping when they sleep. Forget adult time. And yes, I was silly enough to have 4, and now 5.

I guess I really feel no empathy for a mother that had a plethora of people willing to help her if she was overwhelmed doing what she did. Well, honestly I wouldn't feel empathy for ANYONE who beats their 13 month old to death just because that child woke them when they SHOULD be getting up for the day. I never sleep past 7 AM anymore unless my husband is home and decides to take care of the kids in the mornings, which is rare. I had my first daughter right after I turned 20. I'm now 28. I do not have a local babysitter, or anybody to relieve me when I get stressed. And I have NEVER in my wildest dreams, thought of harming my children. EVER. Let alone act on it.

We also aren't talking about a colicky baby, or a sick baby here. We're talking about a toddler ready to get up and start his day getting in the way of his mother's sleep (after all, she's not a morning person and she will "kill you" if you wake her!). We're talking about a selfish mother, who obviously valued her sleep above her own child's life. I realize everyone has a breaking point, but if getting woken up by your child after you were irresponsible enough to party until the wee hours of the morning is yours... you've got some serious problems.

JMO.

 

[sonicfanaticsmommy]

This makes me sick. My son was 1 when I was 20. I slept when he slept. Big deal. You don't go out drinking until 230 am when you have a baby to take care of in the am! It is hard to not go out with your friends when you're that age but it's one of the many sacrifices you make as a mommy. Lack of sleep is another sacrifice. She disgusts m's. RIP little Tyler, I hope you're at peace.

 

[sonicfanaticsmommy]

Oops, meant she disgusts me.

 

[Flutterby80]

I agree that it is important that we talk about the REALITIES of parenting. I think there is something inside most of us that is deathly afraid to admit we have weak moments as parents. I have never, will never spank or so much as slapped my son's hand BUT I will shamefully admit to having flashes of violent thoughts on one occasion when he was up several nights in a row and I had gotten zero sleep. I knew it wasn't his fault. There is something in me, some internal mechanism that will not allow those thoughts to become reality. I think people who snap and whale on their kids are missing whatever that is due to what....drugs? Immaturity? A bad upbringing? I don't know the answer, but I do think it would be more helpful if parents felt it was ok to speak honestly about having those feelings instead of being ashamed.

When my son, the love and light of my life, was just a couple months old, I remember standing on the second floor balcony of our apartment at around 3 am. I had him in my arms and he was crying, had been crying for several nights in a row. I worked full-time. I had just bought us a house and was trying to not only pack up our apartment, but paint and clean the new house so that we could move in. I was a single mom with absolutely zero help and support from my son's dad. I was literally operating on probably six hours sleep over three days time. I could not lay my son down and walk away because if I let him cry like that, the neighbors would not be happy. The people upstairs had already banged on the floor a few times when he would cry. I couldn't put him in the car and drive around like I had the previous nights because I was so incredibly tired that it wouldn't have been safe. As I stood there, I had a horrible thought...if I threw him off my second floor deck, I bet he would stop crying. I actually saw myself doing it. It was the most horrifying thing, to have this thought in my head. Fortunately, that little switch in my brain kicked in and snapped me the heck out of it and fast. My point is, I think some people are missing that switch. And I think it might be helpful for those people to hear from the rest of us that they are not alone in having these horrible moments, but there are ways to handle it and get through it.

 

[Gardenlady]

Children were killed by mothers, fathers, other caregivers long before Casey Anthony was even born, and they will continue to be killed by same long after she has left this world.

I don't think that a parent who kills a child in a fit of rage is thinking about much of anything, at the moment it happens, never mind thinking "well, Casey got off, I can too, I'll just go ahead and kill him and cover it up".

The mind is just not working in a rational way, in this type of killing. There's no thought process, it's just actions only in the heat of the moment. It's exactly why the law recognizes a distinction between premeditated murder and other types.

Wishing death or suicide on the mother, wishing her to receive the death penalty, sticking your fingers in your ears and saying "i had it hard and i never did it, so i don't hear anything about trying to understand!" might help feed a sense of outrage, but it does absolutely nothing to prevent more of these deaths from happening.

 

[Flutterby80]

And please don't mistake my above post for any sort of excusing Shelby's actions. She had MANY MANY choices if she felt she needed a break from the baby. And her baby was not colicky, he was waking up ready to have some breakfast and get his diaper changed. She's a selfish, hateful person and I hope she spends a long, long time in prison.

 

[cluciano63]

Children were killed by mothers, fathers, other caregivers long before Casey Anthony was even born, and they will continue to be killed by same long after she has left this world.

I don't think that a parent who kills a child in a fit of rage is thinking about much of anything, at the moment it happens, never mind thinking "well, Casey got off, I can too, I'll just go ahead and kill him and cover it up".

The mind is just not working in a rational way, in this type of killing. There's no thought process, it's just actions only in the heat of the moment. It's exactly why the law recognizes a distinction between premeditated murder and other types.

Wishing death or suicide on the mother, wishing her to receive the death penalty, sticking your fingers in your ears and saying "i had it hard and i never did it, so i don't hear anything about trying to understand!" might help feed a sense of outrage, but it does absolutely nothing to prevent more of these deaths from happening.

I agree...mothers have killed babies for centuries, the "reasons" or motivations may change over time, but the act doesn't. And Casey Anthony just is not that important. For all we know, this mother may have taken the "kidnapping" idea from the Baby Lisa case...

As far as pleading "not guilty", I think it is standard until she has been appointed a lawyer, etc...if there isn't a plea, you can be sure there will be "extenuating circumstances" brought forward as an attempt to lower the penalty.

 

[Mendara]

http://www.cbsnews.com/i/tim/2011/11/16/Tyler+Dasher+1_540x405.jpg


fly with the angels little one

My heart aches how could anyone beat taht beautiful little boy I don't understand this world.

 

[Gardenlady]

I agree that it is important that we talk about the REALITIES of parenting. I think there is something inside most of us that is deathly afraid to admit we have weak moments as parents. I have never, will never spank or so much as slapped my son's hand BUT I will shamefully admit to having flashes of violent thoughts on one occasion when he was up several nights in a row and I had gotten zero sleep. I knew it wasn't his fault. There is something in me, some internal mechanism that will not allow those thoughts to become reality. I think people who snap and whale on their kids are missing whatever that is due to what....drugs? Immaturity? A bad upbringing? I don't know the answer, but I do think it would be more helpful if parents felt it was ok to speak honestly about having those feelings instead of being ashamed.

When my son, the love and light of my life, was just a couple months old, I remember standing on the second floor balcony of our apartment at around 3 am. I had him in my arms and he was crying, had been crying for several nights in a row. I worked full-time. I had just bought us a house and was trying to not only pack up our apartment, but paint and clean the new house so that we could move in. I was a single mom with absolutely zero help and support from my son's dad. I was literally operating on probably six hours sleep over three days time. I could not lay my son down and walk away because if I let him cry like that, the neighbors would not be happy. The people upstairs had already banged on the floor a few times when he would cry. I couldn't put him in the car and drive around like I had the previous nights because I was so incredibly tired that it wouldn't have been safe. As I stood there, I had a horrible thought...if I threw him off my second floor deck, I bet he would stop crying. I actually saw myself doing it. It was the most horrifying thing, to have this thought in my head. Fortunately, that little switch in my brain kicked in and snapped me the heck out of it and fast. My point is, I think some people are missing that switch. And I think it might be helpful for those people to hear from the rest of us that they are not alone in having these horrible moments, but there are ways to handle it and get through it.

:hug: THANK YOU for sharing that! I too was in the very same state of mind you describe. I don't know what it is that keeps one person from acting, and another from not, but I so wish we had more close monitoring and mentoring of moms and babies once they leave the hospital, and part of that should absolutely be frank talk about how stressful it can be, and no matter what your thoughts are, you aren't alone in having them, and that help will be available.

I think today I will look into that emergency baby drop off organization that others were talking about earlier, and maybe make a donation in little Tyler's name. I hope places like that get much more publicity because of this little one. The more people that know they are there, the more little ones they can help.

 

[Mandy113]

At the time they murder their child, perhaps in a fit of rage, I don't think a killer is thinking ... oh CA got off, I will too.

After they realize what they've done and their only motivation is to save their sorry self ... then I believe they do think about CA and how she got off.

JMO

 

[GEORGIAGIRL69]

How do you propose we prevent these things from happening if we don't try to understand it?

I'm sorry, but I don't have to understand why a mother would beat her baby to death. All I have to understand is that this baby is now dead because of his mother's choice not to control her temper. We are all faced with choices every day. I don't think any amount of understanding is going to prevent this kind of behavior. MOO.

 

[belimom]

I'm not sure I agree the plea was solely based on SD not having counsel present. The judge is making sure her constitutional rights are protected. Her counsel will work with prosecutors for a deal. I think it's pretty typical that people plead NG at an arraignment.

I agree. I think that by entering NG, then it leaves the door open for a plea deal later on --- reduced sentence for a guilty plea, etc. Since a plea can be changed later, then I believe most attorneys would advise a client to plead NG so that evidence can be reviewed, options can be looked at, etc.

Even though we may see it as a clearcut issue, as someone mentioned on another thread recently our justice system would not work without defense attorneys.