GUILTY CA - Terry Smith, 11, autistic, Menifee, 6 July 2013

[kkdj]

I feel IMHO the 16 year old was being very selfish and apparently not getting alot of what he wanted. He was mean to his sister too right? I feel the problem was him.Every one seemed to be having a problem with him.

Maybe he was having problems. Maybe he was selfish. Sounds lije a 16 year old to me.
but once we move to murder of a sibling, something is seriously wrong!
I'm just not buying this whole story. Sonething else more was going on imo

 

[kkdj]

Have we heard from the mother ...ever?

 

[miabellamoure]

I feel IMHO the 16 year old was being very selfish and apparently not getting alot of what he wanted. He was mean to his sister too right? I feel the problem was him.Every one seemed to be having a problem with him.

Well...when your child (SB) has apparent issues that have the potential to cause any kind of harm to another person than, it is your first priority as a parent to take care of this child (SB) and get him the help he needs...not go out to play pool and dump your duties with a child (SB) who could potentially harm any of your vulnerable children in his quake.

This has nothing to do with a parent not having a right to her social/love life...which by the way did not seem to be a problem. <modsnip> :banghead:

 

[Ms Suzanne]

Seriously?! A mother's priorities should be involve her children"s welfare above all else, especially with a child as young as 11. If she wants to go out, it is her responsibility to leave that child in the temporary care of someone whose duty it is monitor and protect the child. <modsnip>

He was 11.He is old enough to stay home alone with his brother.Was his older sister there too?As I said before I do not blame his mother.I do not think she ever ever thought her other son would kill her son.Sibling rivalry.But not murder.It probably just escalated over time to the point of murder.I have 7 children from age 28 to age 10 I have raised.They are all very good kids.

 

[Amster]

Of course not all little boys have an "ism". It is possible the father is accurate. But when I first read his comments he said Terry moved to Calif. last year. Tonight I have read it was 3 years ago. And the father does not seem to have had frequent contact with Terry. It's entirely possible that he didn't know much about Terry's schooling or did not want to believe it if he was told.

I guess I would turn your question around--in my experience it is often the case that a parent doesn't recognize or accept a diagnosable condition, especially when it is not a physical impairment. Some parents and some teachers "don't believe in" ADHD or autism. Because it is not physical, it has a stigma to those who are misinformed.

I have seen nothing to suggest that dad or 2 teachers are misinformed or "don't believe in" ADD, ADHD, autism....

 

[kkdj]

Mom went out the night before she called him in <modsnip> jmo

 

[Bodhi]

I have seen nothing to suggest that dad or 2 teachers are misinformed or "don't believe in" ADD, ADHD, autism....

Nor have I. I was simply replying to your question asking 'Why is it not believable that he was NOT autistic?" with my experience on parents not recognizing or accepting it. Just saying it's equally possible that a long-distance father who did not have frequent contact with his child (not saying that was his choice) may not have known what was happening with the child's schooling. Particularly if he was not on good terms with the child's mother.

I posted earlier that the mother of an autistic child in the same area where Terry lived stated on the Find Terry Smith FB page that Terry was in a social skills class. I do not know the source of her information--she did not say her child was in the same school or district as Terry.

So my opinion is that he may not have been autistic or he may have been. The relevance really is whether his mother said he was to make it seem like Terry wandered off or might be hiding in plain sight or if she was trying to fake an diagnosis as part of a benefit scam as his father alleges.

 

[sophiebelle]

I suppose it may take LE a while to sort through all the tales. I'm not sure dad should be doing all that blasting right now. He should get his turn with LE to tell his side, and if he comes off as a raging bull, they may discount him as a very angry man. I know he is, and he's hurt and frustrated too. I guess they have to talk to sister and anybody else that knew the family dynamics.What a sad family.

 

[Eileen730]

I feel IMHO the 16 year old was being very selfish and apparently not getting alot of what he wanted. He was mean to his sister too right? I feel the problem was him.Every one seemed to be having a problem with him.

And where did his problems begin? We know how it ended!
He is 16! He is not a parent!
Maybe what he wanted was to be 16
Maybe he had to do this ALL THE TIME!
I cant wait to hear the rest of the story!

 

[Eileen730]

Have we heard from mom at all?

 

[Ms Suzanne]

And where did his problems begin? We know how it ended!
He is 16! He is not a parent!
Maybe what he wanted was to be 16
Maybe he had to do this ALL THE TIME!
I cant wait to hear the rest of the story!

I really don't know where his problems began.As I said it probably escalated with time.He seemed to have problems with everyone.The teenage years are very scary.I know with my kids I saw changes when they were on the internet and their peers at school and the things they learned from school especially.As I said I have children I've raised from age 28 to age 10.Most of them boys.Most of what I learned raising my older children I can now look out for with my younger children now and what to look for and be careful about.

 

[Eileen730]

Why would MOM make LE get a search warrant to search her property for her son?
I believe the property was searched once already and they had bloodhounds and found nothing so this child had to be placed there later don't you think?

 

[kkdj]

Link to the interview they just did with Terry's father on the John and Ken show on KFI.

http://www.kfiam640.com/pages/johnandken.html?article=11475053

Very telling.

Just listened to it. Wow!
Seems the mom has been a bit unstable. I sure wish she would speak.

 

[Ragamuffin]

I heard John and Ken interview the "intuitive" tonight, and then the follow up with a Riverside County Sheriff's spokesman. It was very interesting. The RCS confirmed that this lady led them to poor Terry's remains. I can't find a link to that confirmation, but I hope this link works for her conversation with the hosts.

http://media.ccomrcdn.com/media/station_content/616/JK0711135P_1373594438_19089.mp3

If that doesn't work, KFI website has the link under the John and Ken Show page.

 

[RT51]

Nor have I. I was simply replying to your question asking 'Why is it not believable that he was NOT autistic?" with my experience on parents not recognizing or accepting it. Just saying it's equally possible that a long-distance father who did not have frequent contact with his child (not saying that was his choice) may not have known what was happening with the child's schooling. Particularly if he was not on good terms with the child's mother.

I posted earlier that the mother of an autistic child in the same area where Terry lived stated on the Find Terry Smith FB page that Terry was in a social skills class. I do not know the source of her information--she did not say her child was in the same school or district as Terry.

So my opinion is that he may not have been autistic or he may have been. The relevance really is whether his mother said he was to make it seem like Terry wandered off or might be hiding in plain sight or if she was trying to fake an diagnosis as part of a benefit scam as his father alleges.

To be honest, I've met several children who need a social skills class. They might not be on the spectrums, but due to their home life, have never been taught. I'm not talking about using the right silverware, but just how to communicate with others.

 

[Mahouston69]

I have two of five sons on the spectrum. My youngest, 21 yr old is severely autistic, non verbal, and my 22 yr old is high functioning aspergers. I am in just in awe that this woman and her kids, with the "spectrum connection" as i like to call it...led her to this young boy. Truly amazing. I don't know but following this case and eager to find out what on earth happened.

 

[mikeysmommom]

I see a common link in a lot of the threads here and mostly IMO is it the mothers who put there own needs and wants before they put their childrens needs.It makes me realize just how blessed I was with a mother who put her 3 daughters before herself.It seems a lot of down right selfishness on a mothers part that leads to many needless deaths!

 

[writer7]

He was 11.He is old enough to stay home alone with his brother.Was his older sister there too?As I said before I do not blame his mother.I do not think she ever ever thought her other son would kill her son.Sibling rivalry.But not murder.It probably just escalated over time to the point of murder.I have 7 children from age 28 to age 10 I have raised.They are all very good kids.

But if the brother was known to be violent with him, it's not OK. I love my mom (RIP) with every bone in my body, but I was left alone with a sister who beat me up, and it was hell. That's without it leading to much serious injury and certainly not murder It was just awful to not be able to control being beaten every other day. Nobody needs to be beaten often for anything.

My parents figured all kids fight and we were both involved (they weren't there), etc. Just sibling rivalry. Nope. She was a violent bully, and she took out her aggressions on me because she could. She has a sincere problem with anger/aggression and a matching diagnosis now, so it's not 100% her fault, but that doesn't change the fact of the beatings.

Eventually I just broke her nose one day and she finally stopped forever because she knew I'd do it again. I think specialized therapy was more in order, but we were 'just kids' and my parents pretty willfully misunderstood the situation. It's not OK.

PS - love, love my dad now, too. He's had decades of change, thank God.

 

[LaborDayRN]

But if the brother was known to be violent with him, it's not OK. I love my mom (RIP) with every bone in my body, but I was left alone with a sister who beat me up, and it was hell. That's without it leading to much serious injury and certainly not murder It was just awful to not be able to control being beaten every other day. Nobody needs to be beaten often for anything.

My parents figured all kids fight and we were both involved (they weren't there), etc. Just sibling rivalry. Nope. She was a violent bully, and she took out her aggressions on me because she could. She has a sincere problem with anger/aggression and a matching diagnosis now, so it's not 100% her fault, but that doesn't change the fact of the beatings.

Eventually I just broke her nose one day and she finally stopped forever because she knew I'd do it again. I think specialized therapy was more in order, but we were 'just kids' and my parents pretty willfully misunderstood the situation. It's not OK.

PS - love, love my dad now, too. He's had decades of change, thank God.

I'm so sorry you experienced this. It must have been so scary as a child to know you would be left alone with her. As a mom, it just makes me want to hug you.

 

[Newton]

He was 11.He is old enough to stay home alone with his brother.Was his older sister there too?As I said before I do not blame his mother.I do not think she ever ever thought her other son would kill her son.Sibling rivalry.But not murder.It probably just escalated over time to the point of murder.I have 7 children from age 28 to age 10 I have raised.They are all very good kids.

<modsnip>

There was something broken in that family. The 16 yo posted about having significant insomnia. He posted about not wanting to have to stay at home. He also posted about being upset over a breakup. Even if the mother did not have access to his fb page, his attitude should have been enough of an indicator that he was not in a good place emotionally. A good parent does not leave the care of one child in the hands of an emotionally unstable second child.

The father alleges that Terry expressed a desire to return to West Virginia as a result of his older siblings treatment of him. If this is true, I cannot think of a bigger indicator to the mother that she should NOT leave Terry in the brother's care.

I hope that all parents that hear this story think twice about unloading their responsibilities of young children onto the older siblings. When a person decides to have children, they must be prepared to make sacrifices. If they are too selfish to do that, then they have no business having children.