ellen13 said:
Jayelles,
I totally hear you. But in regard to women, I wear my make-up and do my hair to make myself feel good. I don't do it to be sexually attractive. I just like to feel good about myself. Don't you think that some women doll themselves up just to feel good, without trying to look attractive to others? Thoughts?
I'm not trying to argue with you, I'm just pointing out another reason for why women put the effort into it.
Thanks,
Ellen 13
Please do argue - I'm pretty thick skinned
I respectfully agree with you. Research has shown that we are more attracted to people who have big eyes, big lips, even features (Disney used this research to make some characters more appealing than others) ... men are also more likely to be attracted to women with long thick shiny hair (one research project showed that when men are choosing between women - they will often go for the one with the longest hair!)
So what do we do with ourselves? We apply makeup which will make our eyes bigger, lips thicker. We coif our hair - even pay for expensive extensions to make it attractive.
OTOH, body dysmorphia is a recognised mental disorder where people will be so unhappy with their appearance that they will self mutilate - or request surgery to remove linmbs/breasts etc.
Now you say you wear make-up to make yourself feel good - WHY does it make you feel good? The answer is probably that you think you look better. Why does it matter whether you look better? Unless one is a complete narcissist (that is the word I was trying to remember) - you are almost certainly doing it because you have a natural instinct to try and be sexually attractive (whether you are aware of it or not!). You may not necessarily be trying to attract a mate, but IMO, it would be unusual for someone to say they did NOT want to be thought of as (sexually) attractive.
How many of us would apply full make-up to spend a day in total isolation when all you had was a tiny compact mirror (i.e. no large mirrors to walk past and admire one's appearance in). My guess is that few of us would - what would be the point if no-onw was going to see it (except ourselves using the small compact mirror).
It's really quite a primitive instinct to want to be attractive! However - it is much more normal for a woman to seek that for herself and NOT for a 3/4/5/6 year old child.