CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #16

[JustJeannie]

I wonder what MR planned to do to his son for choosing to live with his mother and brother rather than him?

How did MR plan to toughen up his teenage son who chose to live with his mommy rather than him?

SBM

Do we have any verified information that Dylan chose to live with his mother, or even that his father wanted primary custody? From what ER has said, MR was on the road a lot, why would he want (or why would a court consider) primary custody for a parent who is on the road working, when there is a parent who he could live with who is home most nights?

From what I understood, MR wanted visitation, not full custody. If I missed something, please correct me. I just don't remember ever seeing anything that said MR wanted primary custody, or that DR chose which parent he would live with the majority of the time.

 

[rebeccaeee]

It was reported by Elaine that she and Cory texted Dad. Dad did not return the text. To either one.

Or the calls.

 

[SCHMAE]

Aquarians basically possess strong and attractive personalities. They fall into two principle types: one shy, sensitive, gentle and patient; the other exuberant, lively and exhibitionist, sometimes hiding the considerable depths of their character under a cloak of frivolity. Both types are strong willed and forceful in their different ways and have strong convictions, though as they seek truth above all things, they are usually honest enough to change their opinions, however firmly held, if evidence comes to light which persuades them that they have been mistaken. They have a breadth of vision that brings diverse factors into a whole, and can see both sides of an argument without shilly-shallying as to which side to take. Consequently they are unprejudiced and tolerant of other points of view. This is because they can see the validity of the argument, even if they do not accept it themselves. They obey the Quaker exhortation to "Be open to truth, from whatever source it comes," and are prepared to learn from everyone.

http://www.astrology-online.com/aquarius.htm

If anyone cares about this sort of thing.

 

[Donjeta]

Is it true that Elaine could not get hold of MR after she was told he was missing ??

Any chance it was when he was being interviewed by the police at the time?

 

[kkdj]

Did/does MR have a good relationship with any of his children?

 

[LotusPawprint]

I for one would have NEVER allowed my daughter to go visit her father if she did not want to. Thats just me. I am very Lucky that my daughter's father did not have an interest in continuing a relationship with his daughter. The day I kicked him out is the last day he saw her, she was 4. She'll be 28 sooner then she'd prefer and is very well adjusted I may add. I can not imagine that Dylan was not aware of the battle that was going on that involved him.

bbm - but would you have allowed her to go visit if she didn't want to but the judge mandated it and threatened you with contempt of court and losing custody? I'm not being snarky but unless there's abuse or a legitimate reason for a parent not to see the child, the child can't make that choice-- especially a 4 year old.

Now Dylan being 13 is an entirely different case, so it's comparing apples to oranges...

 

[jennapuppy]

Is it true that Elaine could not get hold of MR after she was told he was missing ??

After he notified ER, he went to the sheriff's office to file a report, so it's possible he was meeting with the sheriff at the time and needed to give LE his full attention.
moo

 

[Confusion]

Did/does MR have a good relationship with any of his children?

Not according to his ex-wives, but one son did fly there to give him support shortly after DR disappeared. I'm sure everybody can read that however they want.

 

[asyousay]

Any chance it was when he was being interviewed by the police at the time?

No idea as I can not remember what was said but "if" it true then he would of contacted them afterwards , no ?

 

[FootballMom]

Dylan's wishes as well as his best interests & safety would have been considered by the court. If there was any concern for his well being (proven/established risk) and/or IF Dylan had said he didn't want to spend time with his father then I would expect the court would not have ruled in favor of MR's requests for visitation.

Parenting Time and Child Custody in Colorado

In Colorado, visitation rights are referred to as parenting time. Parents who are not given primary custodial rights are entitled to parenting time. In determining appropriate parenting time, a Colorado court will consider the following factors:

Each parent's wishes
The child's wishes, if the child is mature enough to make an informed decision (Note: In Colorado, there is no specific age requirement that determines the maturity of a minor child)
The child's relationship with his/her parents, siblings and other influential persons
The geographical proximity of the parents in relation to one another
How well each parent places the child's needs above his/her own needs
The mental and physical health of all involved parties
Each parent's encouragement of a relationship between the child and the child's other parent

http://singleparents.about.com/od/childcustodylaws/a/colorado_child_custody_laws.htm

http://www.lexisnexis.com/hottopics/Colorado/

http://www.cordellcordell.com/colorado-family-law-articles/189-colorado-child-custody-questions

 

[ICUDOUCME]

I'm not sure I understand what you mean. If the cost is split halfway I don't see how it would make much of a difference financially or in the probability of the parent choosing to see their children whether they pay for the flight there or for the return flight or every other trip or split the cost of each ticket halfway.

OK many here are thinking MR did something to DR(I am not one of them)....well if ER put him on that plane and paid for that trip, how do you think it would impact her. If something like this was planned in advance and the other parent didn't pay for the trip and it was to get back at said parent, don't you think them paying for the trip is enough. Do you think that if a parent had something like this planned, and the other parent foot the bill for the ride, that it would be easy? Crimes often are committed out of convenience. JMO

 

[asyousay]

After he notified ER, he went to the sheriff's office to file a report, so it's possible he was meeting with the sheriff at the time and needed to give LE his full attention.
moo

Thank you . Was it ever mentioned if he contacted them aftwards as I assume Elaine who was miles away was pulling out her hair at this stage .

 

[i8mypaint]

bbm - but would you have allowed her to go visit if she didn't want to but the judge mandated it and threatened you with contempt of court and losing custody? I'm not being snarky but unless there's abuse or a legitimate reason for a parent not to see the child, the child can't make that choice-- especially a 4 year old.

Now Dylan being 13 is an entirely different case, so it's comparing apples to oranges...

So I just got done with a custody battle in Colorado. We had to go to a CFI and everything. They did not listen to my daughter one bit, they pretty much cut parenting time in half, even though my daughter wanted it to stay the way it was. I was asking it to stay that way. My ex just wanted to pay less in child support. He was also stalking me at this time, which he admitted in court documents and no one seemed to care. If you do not send your kid to the other parent you face: contempt of court charges, possible jail time and loss of all parenting rights and time. MOO it is not worth it to me to possibly lose my child to a man I don't trust and have him have sole custody.

 

[Donjeta]

No idea as I can not remember what was said but "if" it true then he would of contacted them afterwards , no ?

It depends... maybe not if his phone was already full of angry voice mails accusing him to be a child killer?

 

[Irish_Eyes]

bbm - but would you have allowed her to go visit if she didn't want to but the judge mandated it and threatened you with contempt of court and losing custody? I'm not being snarky but unless there's abuse or a legitimate reason for a parent not to see the child, the child can't make that choice-- especially a 4 year old.

Now Dylan being 13 is an entirely different case, so it's comparing apples to oranges...

Even when there is abuse, at 13 a child can't make that choice. The choice for the safe parent sometimes comes down to letting them go into an environment that you know isn't safe or healthy for short periods of time to avoid the alternative of not being the "friendly" parent and the court giving the abuser custody all the time. It's a lose-lose.

 

[Salem]

<modsnip> hooked his shirt and pulled him to the intersection where a car was waiting.

You may think it's hard to believe, <modsnip>! :great:

On a more serious note - sleuthing this intersection, properties around it (without addresses please) and the siting of the Postal Worker would be very, very helpful.

Do we have a good map of that intersection? Showing what lies in the general area - stores, businesses, creeks, etc. etc.?

Salem

 

[ICUDOUCME]

Even when there is abuse, at 13 a child can't make that choice. The choice for the safe parent sometimes comes down to letting them go into an environment that you know isn't safe or healthy for short periods of time to avoid the alternative of not being the "friendly" parent and the court giving the abuser custody all the time. It's a lose-lose.

Agreed!

 

[Irish_Eyes]

It depends... maybe not if his phone was already full of angry voice mails accusing him to be a child killer?

It wouldn't matter to me what my ex said if my child was missing. Heck, that's how he talks about me on a good day, anyways. He could trash me from here to the moon and I wouldn't care, I would be doing everything I could to engage him if I thought there was any chance he could help find my child.

 

[Confusion]

OK many here are thinking MR did something to DR(I am not one of them)....well if ER put him on that plane and paid for that trip, how do you think it would impact her. If something like this was planned in advance and the other parent didn't pay for the trip and it was to get back at said parent, don't you think them paying for the trip is enough. Do you think that if a parent had something like this planned, and the other parent foot the bill for the ride, that it would be easy? Crimes often are committed out of convenience. JMO

I have one big problem with the ncp paying. I've known many spiteful exes, male and female, who have children. There are times when one of them has a much better income, and that's one of the reasons the court allows that person to have physical custody of their child/ren. I think it would be extremely unfair if the custodial parent took the children hundreds, or sometimes thousands. of miles away and says, "If you want to see them, you pay for the airfare!" Because the non-custodial parent can't afford tickets, he/she never gets to see the children. As a result, the children grow up hating the other parent and feeling unloved and unwanted (at least to some extent, depending on who else is in their lives.)

 

[Abby Normal Again]

Aquarians basically possess strong and attractive personalities. They fall into two principle types: one shy, sensitive, gentle and patient; the other exuberant, lively and exhibitionist, sometimes hiding the considerable depths of their character under a cloak of frivolity. Both types are strong willed and forceful in their different ways and have strong convictions, though as they seek truth above all things, they are usually honest enough to change their opinions, however firmly held, if evidence comes to light which persuades them that they have been mistaken. They have a breadth of vision that brings diverse factors into a whole, and can see both sides of an argument without shilly-shallying as to which side to take. Consequently they are unprejudiced and tolerant of other points of view. This is because they can see the validity of the argument, even if they do not accept it themselves. They obey the Quaker exhortation to "Be open to truth, from whatever source it comes," and are prepared to learn from everyone.

http://www.astrology-online.com/aquarius.htm

If anyone cares about this sort of thing.

He shares my sign. I'm not big into astrology, but that was a run-down I hadn't read before.