Dear Jenni,
I wrote a reply but WS ate it, LOL. I owe you a big apology.
You posted to me with grace and kindness. You are an example of a spirit filled lady.
I wrote my post with a few facts about someone who fleeced a lot of people and acted pitiful when she was, in fact, a multi- millionaire waiting on the money.
Let's say it was, in many ways, a " very Raven thing".
I think there is a parable/ cautionary tale of sorts here. I thought about it after I read your lovely reply to my post..
Maybe this is the way people who helped Raven feel, or will soon feel when someone from WS does the right thing and tells all the facts.
IF the facts had been known about what my friend did at the time, it would probably have gone much differently. I know we would have all prayed for her and her family to have the protection of the Spirit, and the intervention of the bishop and first elders might have humbled a proud and dishonest spirit.
I know the LDS church is giving and loving, but honesty in all things is a commandment. She was honest and kind until her mother, whom she was not close to, died and left her an amount of money which she had never had access to before.
My family can laugh off the ways she lied to us and used us now, and we gladly helped her generously without sacrifice because we could do so, but at the time, it was one stressful emergency in her life after the other for months and months, probably even a year. I saw her second grader standing in the cold and rain getting on the school bus beside a very busy highway and just broke down and cried. I would have taken her to school since her non- working mother wouldn't protect her safety, had I known.
All in all, I think the promise of such a large amount of "found money" corrupted something inside my friend's soul. She started neglecting her precious children, dismissed her loving and faithful husband of over 20 years, and used the church and her friends for her immediate wants. She lied about some of the same things Raven did, and for the same reason- money.
She was not marketable as a TV personality in our metro area, not even normally neat in appearance, yet she enrolled herself in a very expensive college to get a major in journalism/ broadcasting while taking her 2 older children out of BYU. She sacrificed her children's dream future for a pipe dream for herself. She has none of the attributes of the on- air personalities, except the gift of gab. It was the most inconsistent thing she did, but she thought she was the next Diane Sawyer. It was an ego thing. She did not see that she was very unsuited for the grandiose plans she had.
This too, reminds me of Raven.
I am being very objective when I say these things. It was shocking to see, because it was so obvious that her behavior was not reality- based.
So much happened with the lies and the taking from people.. Maybe this is how people who embraced Raven feel, in a way. Maybe that's why she came to mind in the first place, because I had not thought of her in quite some time.
My former friend borrowed my favorite car ( the newest luxury car) for weeks at the time to ferry her 4 children to their various schools. She said hers was in the shop, but I think that her husband managed to escape with at least a vehicle. She never even gave me a dollar for the gas or mileage or DIRTY interior when she returned it, nor did she ask any of her children to clean up their mess inside. I know she knew that we didn't NEED the money but it would have been admirable and is what I would have done had I been in the same situation. She bought a new Mercedes SUV which she drove up in and proudly showed us ( with the price sticker still on the window, LOL) and that was that. Of course, she compared her SUV to our luxury sedans and was really like a kid who doesn't know that bragging is rude ( or like Raven with his SUV).
Two of her older children had to come home from their freshman BYU orientation during her trials and tribulations. Her children, aged 6- 19, were tormented when she scrambled to divorce their very nice, mild mannered, LDS father because she didn't want him to have a penny of her mother's money. The children and the rest of us thought they were really happy. I was at their house quite often before her mother died and it was obvious that he loved her and their children dearly, and she was a good mother and wife by outward acts and gestures. He was such a gentle spirit.
The last time I saw their shared home, his things were packed in the garage and he was living in a church- sponsered men's apartment temporarily, while she was moving into her new mansion.
She sued HIM for child support. She issued a restraining order against him so that he could not access the home, or see the children.
She had her assets put in her father's name early to keep her husband from having any legal recourse to " jointly owned property". Her father lives over 1000 miles away and who will never live anywhere near her. ( he has remarried and has a nice second family). I know these things because I looked up the civil court action regarding their divorce and found all these other suits and motions and legal protections put around her by her LDS friend attorney.
I really liked and looked up to this lady as my friend. She was the Relief Society pres. at her ward at the time, which may have been a contributing factor as to why everything was wide open to her as far as material goods and money from the church.
I know that I have forgiven what she did, although I do not understand why money corrupted her to the point of being very duplicitious and horrible to everyone who loved her, especially her spouse and children.
Jenifred said:
ToL--I'm sorry, I was wrong. People do go shopping at the Bishop's Storehouse, however it's not a free for all (or it shouldn't be). Someone does have to go to their house, assess their needs and then fill out a form. Then the person receiving the aid takes the form, after it's been approved by their bishop, then they go to the storehouse and pick up the food. However, if the rules are followed, they are only supposed to get what they need for 2 weeks. If they only need 2 rolls of toilet paper, that's all they're supposed to take--not a whole 4 pack, just what they need.
I didn't mean to split hairs with youor to get off the main topic. But this is how the storehouse is supposed to work. Does it get abused? Probably. Is Raven taking advantage of this? Who knows, but I assume that Karyn and Jim's jobs should provide enough for themselves as well as Raven and Kaiden. They shouldn't be needing to use this storehouse as their grocery.
