Support & Tips to help Cindy Anthony

[Kim Ii]

Logic13,

You have my profound respect and sympathy regarding your post. I am so sorry your family had to endure such a profound tragedy!

I understand the emotions behind your post -- and I completely understand what you are saying...I hope others will, too.

 

[Bathbuddys]

I have thought about writing a note to Cindy but thought maybe it would get in the media or trash? whatever, anyway I have thought about this as, I was a single mom that raised two boys and now my boys are in the military and I have two grandsons that I love beyond what I thought I ever could.
I can see in the photos of Cindy and this sweet baby girl how much love she has for her.

What would I do if my kids lied to me?
Confront them with no mercy!!
If they would still lie to me?
Take away all their toys, TV and COMPUTER would be destroyed and no PS2!
still not an answer?
Theres the door! period.
I have had to use all of these with both of my sons and these are the ONLY things that worked to get them to be accountable for their actions.

Cindy I know you love your daughter, she is your blood and everyone understands this.

What we (Or I ) don't understand is:
why you are allowing her to stomp all over you?
Please get that strenght back that you had the day Casey left! You can do this.
Press charges for the stolen money and credit cards!
If you do not press charges, you will have to pay for this and possibly lose everything you own.
Why don't you try having your sunday vigils in the back yard so it can be sacred? without the protestors interupting your prayers. This way Casey will attend?
The public is mad at you as you are letting your own daughter treat you badly and us moms want you to stand up and fight for your grand daughter.
Cindy you can let this destroy your life and all the other members of your family.
You need to pray for the strength to do what is right for your whole family.
Your husband is a walking time bomb as he cannot provide for his family or protect them.
I am sure you have noticed that when Casey is away, the protestors leave. It isn't that we hate you and George, it is we want you to be her mother and let HER BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR THIS MESS SHE IS!
You didn't do this to her. She has done it to you and everyone else involved.
I agree to talk with your pastor and have the church pray for you and your family.
I also agree with keeping going to your therapist.
Maybe you can get the strength to get Casey out of your house so you can get your thoughts together and keep your thoughts on Caylee and not all the negativity that surrounds you all.
We have all prayed that Caylee will be found safe and come home but would you really want her coming back into all this chaos?
Be strong CINDY! please and you will be AMAZED at all the support that you will have.
Even this fine group of people her will be very supportive if you take some steps to let us all know what is the priority here. To find Caylee right and bring her home!

 

[suspicious mind]

after the baez presser today, here's a tip: fire him, he's an amateur.

 

[DeltaDawn]

If you sincerely want a list here goes.

1. Put Casey back in jail for the crimes she is accused of at this point. Cindy you know she is guilty of those at the very least. This will show her that you are not concerned with her well being..she would be in jail in solitary where no one can hurt her. She may miss the limelight and her power over everyone and beg to get out..ignore her..she has been accused of check fraud , poor parenting, etc..the handwriting in those cases is on the wall. She needs to grow up and you need to let her learn you can not always be there to pick up the pieces, bad behavior has consequences..let her learn that lesson.

2. Now that she is back in jail, thinking you have followed #1, you no longer need body guards or yellow tape..protesters can reach her at the jail.

3. Go out and start looking for Caylee, physically looking for her. Passing out fliers and asking people if they have seen her. Do not discuss your daughter..only Caylee.

4. Go get professional help for yourself and your family in how to deal with this crisis

#5. Now go out and solicit people to help in your search for Caylee and then apologize to people like Tim Miller who has tried to help you. Follow up by being on these searches daily.

#6. Repeat numbers three and five until you find Caylee and can bring her home to rest.

PS..Be sure to ignore Casey's wants and needs..the state is willing to take care of that now..let them...everyone knows when you give children more attention for their bad behavior then their good behavior they keep repeating that behavior because they are getting something from that, well Casey is loving this spotlight isn't she..take that away from her..therefore you need to totally ignore Casey right now and put her back in solitary if you truly want to bring Caylee home.

 

[sweetmop]

I have had my share of problems several years ago with alcoholism and I have to tell you that until everyone stopped enabling me and let me feel the consequences of my actions I was absolutely not going to stop drinking.

I work with other addicts today and I see this principal in action. People do not get better unless they feel the full effects of their actions. It is SO HARD TO WATCH SOMEONE FALL! Very painful and difficult especially since I am the one who has to help pick up the pieces (like CA). But it is really the only way. No one could "nicely" help me get sober.



My prayers are with CA and GA. They did not sign up for this. I think we all say we would have handled it differently but honestly, how many of us have ever been in this situation?

Part of my recovery is not judging someone unless you have walked a mile in their shoes. I most certainly cannot even fathom a day in CA/GA's life right now.

(Clean and Sober 3 1/2 years!:clap

I applaud you on your sobriety.
Every word you've said here is the truth, as I have a beloved family member struggling with addiciton now.
Thank you for sharing.

 

[TURBOTHINK]

after the baez presser today, here's a tip: fire him, he's an amateur.

I agree.............something is wrong with his competency.

I want Casey to answer for any crimes she committed, but I also want her to have adequate legal rights and I don't believe this man is capable of providing those for her.

Since the beginning he has made some foolish mistakes and this 6 hours a day in his office looks very non-professional.

 

[TURBOTHINK]

Get Casey's cellphone statements and starting with dates that seem significant start calling every number on there and ask questions.

Get the credit card statements for all cards that Casey used and examine the charges. What was bought where and when? Using the dates that YOU last saw Caylee what did Casey do around those dates?

Get Casey's bank statements and examine all deposits and withdrawls for the past year. Do the deposits coincide with the money she stole? If not, where did deposit money come from? Do any of the deposits match any oddities in the phone records or credit card statements?

Ask Casey flat out what she was doing for the two years she pretended to have a job!
Ask Casey why she brought LE to Universal!
Ask Casey why she borrowed a shovel from the neighbor and if she says to dig up bamboo shoots ask her WHY since (according to her story) Caylee had already been taken?

Continue to ask Casey these questions and if she does not give you a REASONABLE and LOGICAL explanation do not shelter her in your house.

Very good advice there..............I hope Cindy follows it.

 

[SUR]

after the baez presser today, here's a tip: fire him, he's an amateur.

Only Casey can make that decision, not Cindy and IMO he is doing a great job. He was so right in the presser yesterday and IMO that is why a lot of people don't like him. I really don't think some people would like any lawyer that would defend Casey but no mattter if they like it or not Casey does have the right to a lawyer.

 

[jomasano]

First, I am VERY sorry for what YOU and GEORGE are going through. The animosity outside your house would just kill me. I understand that. I think most people would become aggressive and on the defensive if they were attacked and doubted from all sides like you are.

The good news is YOU can change that.

- I believe that you have to take a lie detector test. YOU and GEORGE HAVE TO. Too many people have lost faith that you're not just protecting Casey while knowing that Caylee is really gone. I really hope you do this.

- I think that you should have a news conference, twice a week, in your attorney's office or in a controlled environment. NO SCREAMING OR FINGER POINTING ALLOWED. Make a statement that says something, how you feel about finding Caylee, maybe take a few questions. Speak with your heart. Tell the truth, even if you know people won't like it. The answers have to be your true beliefs. Not whatever anybody else is saying you should say. If you feel that Caylee MIGHT be gone, but still have to keep hoping for your own sanity, you should say so. If you believe Casey, you have to make people understand why. Even if it is only because you feel you have to protect or support her, just say it.

- Try and see the situation from the people searching and praying for Caylee's perspective. You have to understand the frustration. Put yourself in their shoes even tough some don't return the favour. You need to let people know you understand why they feel like that. Let the protestors know how much their screaming and signs hurt. Let people know you care, but that you need to do what you feel is right. Talk about how you may have said things you didn't mean just because you were scared or hurt. Say how grateful you are for all the help and prayers you've received but that you need more. Tell people what you need from them. ALWAYS speak from your heart! You can't go wrong.

- Address everything. What your leads are, show Casey's phone records you talked about on NG's show. What you meant when you said people didn't have all the facts. If you can't disclose everything, explain why. Even talk about your relationship with Casey. How you feel about her. Explain why you think she lied like that. How angry and hurt you were and still are probably. But that she still is your daughter, no matter what.

- You have to become an open book. On and around July the 16th, you spoke with your heart, showed how scared you were. You asked for help from everybody and you got it. At some point, you clamed up and just defended Casey. Maybe that's not what you wanted to do and now feel you shouldn't have, just admit you made mistakes or wrong choices. You are human, just like everyone else. Just show some emotions. It is ok to be vulnerable, to need help!

People want to help but they want to know that you really need it.

Honesty, truth, good or bad, is what people want to feel in return.

 

[karenmamo]

Cindy,
Try to obey the gag order.
Do not go to jail because of your mouth.
Your husband cannot keep your trap shut for you, but YOU must!!!

 

[Pink Panther]

I’m not a psychiatrist but I’ve watched this whole case unfold now for several months. Reading today’s release of George’s interview really made the “penny drop” for me. CA is the one who is controlling this family. She has been (to use her own vocabulary) since “day one”. I remember LA testify at the bond hearing and he made such a point of saying that he and KC had a close relationship because he loved KC “unconditionally”. That has always stood out for me. Why would he say such a thing? Why would it be so important for him to use that term? Well, it’s pretty obvious now – CA sets conditions on everything. KC is still in CA’s “good books” as long as she tows the line on this absurd kidnapping tale. CA has basically hand-cuffed her daughter to this story. Until she is prepared to let go, and set her free, KC is going to tow the line. Why haven’t we heard/seen a confession from her? Because her mother has not given her permission to do so! Quite the opposite. Her mother has professed trust and complete loyalty as long as the kidnapping “script” is followed. I really wish for everyone’s sake, that CA would set her daughter free. Free to tell the truth and to do the right thing. KC will never tell the truth without assurance that her mother will still love her. The second CA realizes this and tells KC that she will love her regardless of what happened, is the second that Caylee will be given a chance to come home. Caylee deserves to come home. I hope that CA reads here and I hope that she reads this.

 

[DollyPardonMe]

Cindy,

Don't try to do everything..you can't. Let go..Let God. Forgive yourself..

 

[lizzysf]

This is such a sad and twisted story. My advice is LET GO of it, accept the facts, accept the losses and allow yourself to grieve. Quit beating a dead horse. Please get professional help. You cannot save Casey, she has to pay the consequences. It is time to save yourselves before it is too late. And mostly, put Caylee first, not last as you are doing now. She is dead and gone from this world, from your world. Bring her home in one last act of love and live up to your pledges as grandparents to watch over her. She needs to be brought home. Lee, please do the right thing and talk some sense into your parents.

 

[LeLe1953]

I’m not a psychiatrist but I’ve watched this whole case unfold now for several months. Reading today’s release of George’s interview really made the “penny drop” for me. CA is the one who is controlling this family. She has been (to use her own vocabulary) since “day one”. I remember LA testify at the bond hearing and he made such a point of saying that he and KC had a close relationship because he loved KC “unconditionally”. That has always stood out for me. Why would he say such a thing? Why would it be so important for him to use that term? Well, it’s pretty obvious now – CA sets conditions on everything. KC is still in CA’s “good books” as long as she tows the line on this absurd kidnapping tale. CA has basically hand-cuffed her daughter to this story. Until she is prepared to let go, and set her free, KC is going to tow the line. Why haven’t we heard/seen a confession from her? Because her mother has not given her permission to do so! Quite the opposite. Her mother has professed trust and complete loyalty as long as the kidnapping “script” is followed. I really wish for everyone’s sake, that CA would set her daughter free. Free to tell the truth and to do the right thing. KC will never tell the truth without assurance that her mother will still love her. The second CA realizes this and tells KC that she will love her regardless of what happened, is the second that Caylee will be given a chance to come home. Caylee deserves to come home. I hope that CA reads here and I hope that she reads this.

:clap::clap::clap::clap::clap: Very good points. Casey said in the beginning her mother would never forgive her. I personally think no one visiting her in jail is a good thing. If Casey is going to tell what happened, she needs to be free from the hold Cindy has on her.

I have alway's felt appearance is everything to Cindy. She wanted everyone to believe they were a close family with no issues. She would rather leave Caylee out there than admit her daughter has done wrong. I don't know if it's just out & out denial or her wanting to keep up appearance's. It sound's like Cindy knew the truth the night she found Casey without Caylee plus the smell of the car. I think George has wanted to "shake" some truth/reality into Cindy but just couldn't see her heart break anymore. He knew the instant we approached the car.

I think he went to talk to LE so often because he had no one else. He couldn't have a discussion with Cindy that Caylee was dead. I thought me made it clear to LE he could not shut Cindy up, didn't agree with all the media interviews or her attacks on LE. I think he has been himself with LE but what CIndy wanted or needed him to be in public. I do not think anyone in this family helped Casey dispose of Caylee or move her body. Casey did this all on her own. My heart does go out to George for going thru this so alone. I hope both he & Cindy find peace & closeure.

 

[LeLe1953]

This is such a sad and twisted story. My advice is LET GO of it, accept the facts, accept the losses and allow yourself to grieve. Quit beating a dead horse. Please get professional help. You cannot save Casey, she has to pay the consequences. It is time to save yourselves before it is too late. And mostly, put Caylee first, not last as you are doing now. She is dead and gone from this world, from your world. Bring her home in one last act of love and live up to your pledges as grandparents to watch over her. She needs to be brought home. Lee, please do the right thing and talk some sense into your parents.

:clap::clap: George really seems to admire the minister & has a deep friendship with him. I am happy he has him. I hope the minister can convince all of them to go to a grief counseler. If Cindy won't go, George should go on his own. I hope Cindy can bring herself to understand it's okay to still love Casey, that's her child. It's not okay to help her cover a murder or insist Casey continue the lies for moms sake. I think all KC needs to hear from her parent's is they love her, always will, but it's okay to tell the truth.

 

[Anais]

CINDY:

Take a polygraph.

Try and be cooperative with LE and give them everything that they have asked you for.

Be honest and try and stop making conflicting statements and or stories.

Get some help from a therapist or counselor to help with all of the pain, frustration and anger.

Ignore the protestors.

My thoughts and prayers are for Caylee to be found, and that you, George and Lee get some peace and closure.

 

[butwhatif?]

Cindy,
I dont blame you for lashing out at people who accuse you of being a bad parent. I dont blame you for doing whatever you can to make it through each day. I dont blame you for Casey's actions.
I know sometimes it seems easier to focus on the things you can control, I do it too. I also know the relief that comes with letting go.
I'm sorry that so many people thing they have the right to stand in judgement of you. It may be their legal right, but it doesnt make it morally right.
I'm sorry that you have had people rip up posters of your princess Caylee.
I'm sorry that you are having to go through any of this.
I know that what keeps you going is the thought that Caylee will be in your arms again one day. That you want to hear her little voice singing 'you are my sunshine'. Tucking her in at night, and reading to her. Nobody should try to take that away from you no matter what they believe.
I want you to know that I have never, even for a second, questioned the love you have for your entire family, especially Caylee.
Be safe, and hold each other tight this weekend. My thoughts are with you.:blowkiss:

 

[LI_Mom]

:clap::clap: George really seems to admire the minister & has a deep friendship with him. I am happy he has him. I hope the minister can convince all of them to go to a grief counseler. If Cindy won't go, George should go on his own. I hope Cindy can bring herself to understand it's okay to still love Casey, that's her child. It's not okay to help her cover a murder or insist Casey continue the lies for moms sake. I think all KC needs to hear from her parent's is they love her, always will, but it's okay to tell the truth.

Well said, LeLe.

I think Casey is punishing her mother by not telling the truth. And I suspect she's SO angry at her mother for notifying authorities that Caylee was missing that she will have no motivation to ease her family's heartache anytime soon.

Right now, the ONLY power Casey has left in this world are the secrets she is guarding.

Who knows if Casey will EVER be able to admit the truth to anybody but I suspect she doesn't want to give up her 'ace in the hole.'. Once she tells the truth she runs the risk of knowing they might never 'need' to speak to her again.

The ball is in Casey's court & boy does she enjoy knowing she has rendered her parents completely powerless....... finally.

So sad for poor Cindy, George & Lee. They surely did nothing to deserve this hell on earth.

 

[butwhatif?]

I have had my share of problems several years ago with alcoholism and I have to tell you that until everyone stopped enabling me and let me feel the consequences of my actions I was absolutely not going to stop drinking.

I work with other addicts today and I see this principal in action. People do not get better unless they feel the full effects of their actions. It is SO HARD TO WATCH SOMEONE FALL! Very painful and difficult especially since I am the one who has to help pick up the pieces (like CA). But it is really the only way. No one could "nicely" help me get sober.



My prayers are with CA and GA. They did not sign up for this. I think we all say we would have handled it differently but honestly, how many of us have ever been in this situation?

Part of my recovery is not judging someone unless you have walked a mile in their shoes. I most certainly cannot even fathom a day in CA/GA's life right now.

(Clean and Sober 3 1/2 years!:clap

YAY for you!!!:blowkiss:
My story is much the same- it wasnt until my mum used the tough love approach, that I ended up going into rehab, and finding myself....but it was just as hard for my mum to do that as it was for me to confront what led me to my addiction.
Great post, K.

 

[passionflower]

Stop the lies, search for truth, help LE and get a good shrink! Then you will get the support and sympathy you really need at this time.......