I agree. And if you listen to all of the audio tapes you will hear indisputable evidence that JD was also abused verbally and emotionally by AH. AH also attempted to control him via drugs (insisting he, an opioid addict, take Xanax multiple times), tried to control his freedom of movement (multiple examples of her chasing him to various rooms, residences, out of elevators etc), initiating arguments which led to him being late to work, refusing to let him leave/de-escalate. She may be claiming financial abuse now, but he discharged all of their joint debts including that horrendous wine bill, and on the tapes you can hear him trying to pay for her Ubers, but she refuses to take money from him. In fact, she claimed in the UK trial under oath that she remained financially independent throughout their relationship and marriage. So why change that story now? Because she needed the jury to believe she was a poor hapless, helpless, vulnerable, naïve, sober victim who was preyed upon by a powerful, older, richer, predatory man. She needed the jury to see JD as another Harvey Weinstein. Luckily, the jury saw through that act.
Abuse is about power and control. It's pretty clear that AH was the one trying to exert control over the relationship. Despite her claims to the contrary, she was the one who had the most power in their private lives. She was suffering from personality disorders (BPD, HPD) and her own heavy substance/alcohol abuse which exacerbated her need to control him, his behavior, his access to friends and family, his time, his attention. The amount of belittling, taunting and verbal haranguing she subjected him to is proof that she was the aggressor and instigator of much of the toxicity in the relationship. In the audio tapes you can hear him trying many times to de-escalate, talk rationally about the problems in the marriage, to explain as patiently as he could what he felt they needed to work on. He's not the one yelling and screaming abuse when things get heated, in fact it's he who tries to keep things calm and civil for the most part. If he was jealous, those fears were not unfounded. We have proof from video footage, nurses notes and friend's depos that she was bringing men into the PH (into HIS home) and being unfaithful. He was powerless to stop his wife's infidelity. You might not have noticed but she was the one isolating him. He was paying for her friends and family to live with her, vacation with her. She was surrounded by her support network. And yet, as others have testified (in terms of them being aware she was manipulative and jealous, monoploizing his time) and you can hear it on the tapes, she told him only she was genuinely looking out for him, only she was truly in his corner the rest were sycophants. She turned him against his friends and colleagues. He became more withdrawn from his support network. This is all textbook stuff in the DV manual.
Yes, he did lash out verbally sometimes in retaliation. That's true. He did return the insults. This is called reactive abuse, when a DV victim has been so beaten down and attacked that they react negatively themselves, then the abuser uses that to justify their violence "see, you called me names, you were mean, you shoved me back/off of you, you are the abuser!". It's a very common phenomenon. I don't think any abuse victims should be expected to just take the constant abuse for years and never react. DV victims are allowed to be imperfect (as AH's team claimed and ironically this applies to JD). Venting texts to other parties about AH and her cheating/lies/abuse do not constitute abuse on AH. They just don't, and it was ridiculous for the defense team to focus so heavily on this. None of those ugly texts or emails were even directed at her.
It's also rather telling that he gave her many chances to stop her public smear campaign, to try to work things out so that neither them would face public repercussions. He tried to protect her 'credibility' that she was so worried about, but she kept blowing things up in a public way. She instigated the public attacks with her TRO, then couldn't back down from it. Then when the divorce was finally settled, they released a joint public statement where they claimed neither was an abuser. Two years later she broke the divorce contract (where neither was to publicly disparage the other) in order to write the Op Ed. She couldn't let it go. She couldn't let Johnny go. You heard it herself from her own mouth on the stand. She couldn't stand that he still had supporters, that he wasn't completely ruined. Her need for control over her victim caused her to lash out once again. But, thankfully, this time, JD decided to stand up and say enough is enough. He held her accountable her words and her actions. He took her to court and he won. Truth and justice won, in my opinion.
And yet AH still can't let it go. She sends out her lawyer to keep being the attack dog on the morning shows. She publicly announces it was a travesty of justice for women and she will be appealing. Look at her complaints through various spokespeople. How dare JD continue on with his life. How dare he fulfill work obligations and not be there for the verdict. How dare he celebrate getting his life back. How dare he join TikTok and thank his fans.
Again, I need to ask, who is obsessed with and trying to control whom? Who is really the jealous one? Who is still trying to harm the other?
All of womanhood and DV victimhood are being destroyed by JD existing and winning his court case!!! Are you kidding me? The weaponizing of MeToo and domestic violence victims, heck even feminism itself against her ex-partner just makes me sick. She doesn't speak for me or for any righteous cause or movement, imo. She needs to quit with the grandiose statements, her narcissistic tendencies are showing.
JMO but I think AH is most upset by the fact that he won't look at her, he won't talk to her, he won't take her back and he won't allow her to control his life for one second more. The rage is palpable. And it scares me. It should scare you, too. We are seeing a narcissistic abuser melting down in real time and in public due to the celebrity factor. I truly hope that she does move on and try to be the best mother she can be, despite her proven character deficits. I really do. I just don't think the story ends here. I hope I am wrong.
