SC - Heather Elvis, 20, Myrtle Beach, 18 Dec 2013 #25 ***ARREST**

[passionflower]

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/borderline-personality-disorder-topic-overview

I find this also interesting since SM was charged with assault once and shop lifting.
TM burst of anger, fear of abandonment, binge eating????? (her weight gain and food obsession on social media)
can a person be narcissist, phycopath, co dependent and borderline??? any mental health experts here????

 

[LittleRose]

BBM...

I think its a little more than Tammy having diarrhea of the mouth, I have no sympathy for TM or SM. In my mind they are both equally to blame.

Tammy obviously wasn't smart enough to know they would end up in jail because they did both end up in jail. In my mind I think they are both involved in this and thankfully neither one is very bright imo.


This is my personal opinion and not necessarily the opinion of Websleuths LLC. Feel free to respectfully disagree.

Oh, I think it's more too. Obviously, they are both personality disordered in the least. They may both be equally to blame for this happening, but I'd be surprised to learn that this was planned, considering the cell phone conversations left as a breadcrumb trail, and I'd be surprised to learn that TM was the killer. I could see TM and HE engaging in verbal assaults, hair pulling, and face slapping, but SM is stronger and more likely, IMO, to finish what he started or to have become dangerously violent ( he had a history of losing it physically). Statistically, men are more likely to KILL.

(I know this isn't going to be popular, but I'm going to say it...). I am a woman. I am in my 40's. When I was a little girl, I noticed how nasty girls were towards each other. I'm the mom of 4 boys. Boys don't ordinarily do this to each other. They may brawl, but after it's over, it's over. They're less likely than girls to attempt a character assassination of their adversaries.

As an adult woman, I notice women tend to demonize a woman over a man. Both TM and HE probably did this. IMO, many on this forum are too. I don't for a second believe that SM was some beaten down, cow towed man. Either TM and SM are equally guilty of murdering HE, or SM did it all on his own. I don't believe TM snuck up on SM and HE and killed only HE, obligating SM to help her hide the body.

Take the Jodi Arias trial... Jodi is obviously anti-social. People, particularly women went nuts over this case. Why? The majority of sociopaths and psychopaths are MEN. They've been killing women since the beginning of time. We rarely hear about these cases anymore they're so common.

Why are women biased against women? (It's a huge disservice to our gender.).




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[Justice4Heather]

I'm not a mental health expert. But I think that what either of the Moorer's suffer from is not something that prevents them from knowing right from wrong.

 

[cujenn81]

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/borderline-personality-disorder-topic-overview

I find this also interesting since SM was charged with assault once and shop lifting.
TM burst of anger, fear of abandonment, binge eating????? (her weight gain and food obsession on social media)
can a person be narcissist, phycopath, co dependent and borderline??? any mental health experts here????

I'm no mental health expert by any stretch of the imagination but I do have a BA in psych. And based on my knowledge, most people who are codependent in a relationship are that way because their counterpart is a narcissist. They are like opposites and magnets for each other.

But to answer your question, yes. Many people with personality or mood disorders have overlapping symptoms seen in multiple disorders. Borderline AND narcissistic. Even ADHD AND OCD. Bipolar AND social anxiety disorders. Sometimes there's no clear cut mold for the behaviors of one individual. They might have 7-8 of the symptoms listed in the DSM that meet the criteria for one diagnosis but also display 4-5 symptoms of another. Personality disorders are grouped into clusters: odd (schizo or paranoid types), dramatic & emotional (anti-social, borderline, narcissistic), & anxious (anxiety, OCD). So someone in the dramatic/emotional cluster might exhibit one or two symptoms of anti-social but overall exhibit symptoms of borderline.



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[Justice4Heather]

What if the Moore's went together, after discussing it, to PTL after setting up HE. What if the IE charges where due to a hyped up sex drive knowing that they were going to do something to HE. I think there was a plan and they are sick people. JMO

 

[MaliaMansly]

Oh, I think it's more too. Obviously, they are both personality disordered in the least. They may both be equally to blame for this happening, but I'd be surprised to learn that this was planned, considering the cell phone conversations left as a breadcrumb trail, and I'd be surprised to learn that TM was the killer. I could see TM and HE engaging in verbal assaults, hair pulling, and face slapping, but SM is stronger and more likely, IMO, to finish what he started or to have become dangerously violent ( he had a history of losing it physically). Statistically, men are more likely to KILL.

(I know this isn't going to be popular, but I'm going to say it...). I am a woman. I am in my 40's. When I was a little girl, I noticed how nasty girls were towards each other. I'm the mom of 4 boys. Boys don't ordinarily do this to each other. They may brawl, but after it's over, it's over. They're less likely than girls to attempt a character assassination of their adversaries.

As an adult woman, I notice women tend to demonize a woman over a man. Both TM and HE probably did this. IMO, many on this forum are too. I don't for a second believe that SM was some beaten down, cow towed man. Either TM and SM are equally guilty of murdering HE, or SM did it all on his own. I don't believe TM snuck up on SM and HE and killed only HE, obligating SM to help her hide the body.

Take the Jodi Arias trial... Jodi is obviously anti-social. People, particularly women went nuts over this case. Why? The majority of sociopaths and psychopaths are MEN. They've been killing women since the beginning of time. We rarely hear about these cases anymore they're so common.

Why are women biased against women? (It's a huge disservice to our gender.).




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BBM: I can only speak for myself however, IMO, too many fought for women to have equal rights and to be treated with respect. When one woman kills another woman over a man...that, IMO, sets the whole equal rights movement back by leaps and bounds.

Murder is inexcusable under ANY circumstance. When a man cheats on his wife, the wife should be looking to punish the man, not the other woman. Back before equal rights (and perhaps still in some cultures), when a woman cheated on her husband, the husband was allowed to beat her, drag her into the street and set her on fire, etc. The wife was his property. Women have fought TOO HARD and come TOO FAR to stoop to that level. So to me, IMO, when a woman kills another woman over a cheating man, that woman deserves to have every other woman be biased against her.

A murderous woman who kills another woman and stays with her cheating husband, IMO, are a huge disservice to our gender as well.

 

[WideOpen]

I see where you are coming from and appreciate your opinion, but for some reason ..Sid strikes me as a spineless man-child.

the reasons I don't feel he orchestrated at least the intent to cause bodily harm (please please understand that I do feel the murder charges are correct though)
is because:
1. He wasn't "allowed" to have his own facebook.
Not everyone is interested in using FB-he was out meeting/socializing with people in real life-IMO
2. Tammy actually called him stupid and belittled him in public/online.
Yes. She is projecting her own feelings to compensate for her lack of "control" over him.
3. He never once stuck up for himself.
Why would he, he doesnt answer to anyone. He does whaat he wants without explanation.
4. He got her name on his pelvis but did she get a tattoo of his name?
Yep, this one is a weak spot in my theory-However, it IS several years old and is just the outline. IT is unfinished-commitment left undone.
5. He allowed her to call the shots
Can you be more specific?
6. She (or her family) owned the property, the cars, and had the money.
Exactly-TM used this $ to keep him and he took advantage of her as it suited him. (promise you will never have another affair and I will buy you a truck)
7. Everything was always about Tammy
Sure, that way he can fly under the radar. Passive aggressive.
8. She left him, he never left her.
TM left him? I have not seen this anywhere.

The list kinda goes on from there. I think Heather made him feel like he was some sort of adonis and he had zero responsiblities to her. Now, with as scary as Tammy is rumored to be (and we know how callous she is), could you imagine him standing up to her or pinning one woman against the other? From the sounds of it Heather wasn't really to keen on the drama but Tammy was. I don't feel this is because Sid taunted Tammy with Heather or vice versa, I think it's because maybe Sid took less interest to Tammy in the bedroom, didn't compliment her more and someone else got all his attention. Someone else made Sid feel good and Tammy was having absolutely none of that!
I don't think this was SM first affair. He most likely felt like an ADONIS regardless of who the woman was. IMO it is a lot of speculation. Now that 15 years have gone by and TM has aged (ungracefully) SM has her in a position to turn the table. TM is weak, vulnerable, and not in a position to keep SM. He is detached and is using everything he learned from TM to play her game back on her.

None of us can truly guess the dynamics of this toxic love triangle but a few of us have either been in Tammy's shoes or Heather's (maybe both). These things all seem to go by a script at times, at least until someone is caught - that's when situations take a life of their own. There's no real guidebook to cheating but there's a list of "signs" to know if your spouse is .. for a reason, know what I mean?
Yep. Been there, done that. I truly see SM playing TM like it is her fault he is having the affair. This makes TM crazy with insecurity. I view SM as playing Heather for whatever he can get-maye even prompting her to move out from the former apartment with prior BF so that SM could spend more time with her or position Heather for supporting SM. Example-I will leave Tammy if you leave youre EX then we can get a place together.

And the list I rattled off earlier on why sid probably was attracted to Heather or what she did for him was based on how I get men to spend tons of money on me in strip clubs or as a dominatrix. They are all married and these are all the things they lack at home - so I make them feel 100% and like the only thing that matters in my world. It's my job so it's not the same as a relationship, however those feelings are what they are desiring so badly in a relationship - so when they cheat and someone does those things, they are hooked .. at least temporarily.

Understand. Men are silly creatures sometimes, haha.

Thanks Astrokitty!


I am not exactly sure how to organize a thorough response highlighting and quoting but will give it a shot.

My responses are highlighted in red.

IMO I see SM as fully manipulating the crime. I think he became outraged and jealous and wanted to see Heather that night and made plans to meet her. Telling TM he was just going to see her, "one more time". Heather may have given him an ultimatum and been sassy mouthed, insulted him, deflated his ego, and he just lost it. TM was called after the fact to cover his arse and clean up the mess. (Heather you're not a mess sweet angel).

I do think TM is a crazy, dangerous, nut job. I just think SM is accountable for the murder.

JMO

 

[lstiff]

<sniped for space>
People need to realise this case may never make it to trial, or that it could be 3 or 4 years before the trial proper takes place.

BBM Here in Charlotte a triple murder from 2008 just went to trial and the verdict came this week. They still have not had the sentencing and will see if it is DP or not. http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2014/03/04/4741328/jury-to-consider-rare-death-penalty.html#.UxdlRj9dVO4

 

[Justice4Heather]

BBM Here in Charlotte a triple murder from 2008 just went to trial and the verdict came this week. They still have not had the sentencing and will see if it is DP or not. http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2014/03/04/4741328/jury-to-consider-rare-death-penalty.html#.UxdlRj9dVO4

Thanks. At least we will be able to see justice in time. Its sad knowing there are so many others who haven't or won't.

 

[Quill]

I've posted here before about my sister being a narcissist. I saw the similarities between her and TM pretty early on from reading here and elsewhere. You learn to see the signs eventually when you've had to deal with this a long time. And yes, it takes a huge toll on those who are closely associated. Big family issues arise. Things I used to hold against either of my parents for their failed marriage I now see as being largely related to the stress of this disorder on our family.

She was married to a very sweet, passive, co-dependent, highly intelligent man. He has left and they are now divorced. Oh, and he cheated. See the pattern? There is more, but I don't have the energy to go all the way there. It wears me out just taking my brain here.

 

[SeaNymph]

Police do believe that Elvis drove herself to the Peachtree Boat Landing. They don’t think she was abducted from her River Oaks apartment.

Investigators reached that conclusion after reviewing communications Elvis made through social media, but investigators haven’t said why Elvis drove herself to the boat landing.

http://www.myhorrynews.com/news/crime/article_9134b14e-9d67-11e3-a5f5-0017a43b2370.html

She posted something somewhere. Sending her father the photo of her driving a standard shift would not count as a "communication through social media", imo.

I wonder if 'social media' could mean merely texting. We're getting into semantics I guess with the word "media", one may automatically assume 'broadcast' to an audience, but I wonder if it was an offhand, catch-all phrase used my LE referencing her phone/texting communications. We've all been focused on the phone/text activity between Heather and SM solely - maybe its as simple as a text to her best friend along the lines of 'he asked me to meet him at PTL - I'm going'.....Friend was still out of town, none the wiser anything was amiss until everything blew up with TE finding car....there's never been any mention of WHO ELSE Heather may have communicated with that morning..... Could be as simple as that and once finding it out LE kept (keeps) it quiet knowing THEY know something the M's don't know they know - and clearly, ALL the details have not been released to the public. Makes you wonder, WE may only have the equivalent of a grain of salt compared to all unreleased info thus far, just to keep M's from getting a jump on information.

Just :moo: and pondering over here.

WHERE, OH WHERE IN THE WORLD IS HEATHER??? I don't know her either, but I want her home so badly for her family.

 

[margarita25]

Thank you for sharing your story, Margarita. That took courage. So pray tell, what happened after that? You saved his life.
I'm sure if you had to do it all over again, you'd play it differently, right?

:seeya:

I packed my bags, left that town and never looked back.

Shortly thereafter, I met a wonderful man who showed me what healthy love is all about. He helped break down the wall I had put up after my horrible experience, and taught me how to trust again. We spent 15 wonderful years together.

 

[Motherof5]

Oh, I think it's more too. Obviously, they are both personality disordered in the least. They may both be equally to blame for this happening, but I'd be surprised to learn that this was planned, considering the cell phone conversations left as a breadcrumb trail, and I'd be surprised to learn that TM was the killer. I could see TM and HE engaging in verbal assaults, hair pulling, and face slapping, but SM is stronger and more likely, IMO, to finish what he started or to have become dangerously violent ( he had a history of losing it physically). Statistically, men are more likely to KILL.

(I know this isn't going to be popular, but I'm going to say it...). I am a woman. I am in my 40's. When I was a little girl, I noticed how nasty girls were towards each other. I'm the mom of 4 boys. Boys don't ordinarily do this to each other. They may brawl, but after it's over, it's over. They're less likely than girls to attempt a character assassination of their adversaries.

As an adult woman, I notice women tend to demonize a woman over a man. Both TM and HE probably did this. IMO, many on this forum are too. I don't for a second believe that SM was some beaten down, cow towed man. Either TM and SM are equally guilty of murdering HE, or SM did it all on his own. I don't believe TM snuck up on SM and HE and killed only HE, obligating SM to help her hide the body.

Take the Jodi Arias trial... Jodi is obviously anti-social. People, particularly women went nuts over this case. Why? The majority of sociopaths and psychopaths are MEN. They've been killing women since the beginning of time. We rarely hear about these cases anymore they're so common.

Why are women biased against women? (It's a huge disservice to our gender.).






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Tammy has shown utter rage and hatred toward HE,that is why, "many on this forum" feel the way that we do. It doesn't mean that we are biased against women nor are we doing a,"disservice to our gender". You feel that SM is a,b and c and did x,y and z...yet no one is calling you a man hater. Again,we all have different opinions and there is no need for you to bash those who don't share your opinions. As I said before,agree to disagree.

 

[primitivefuture]

But why? Planning? Digging graves ahead of time? What did this girl do to warrant being murdered? Whom did she threaten/and if TM was so controlling--making SM wear a leash or whatever--why couldn't she just dominate him over to her side again? Planned murder--jointly planned and carried out--I just don't get it. Something is missing.

I missed this thing about TM making SM wear a collar/leash? I've seen a few posts about it today. Is this something that she posted about online? Can anyone give me a link? Thanks!


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[Justice4Heather]

I missed this thing about TM making SM wear a collar/leash? I've seen a few posts about it today. Is this something that she posted about online? Can anyone give me a link? Thanks!


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Not making SM literally wear one. Just speaking of her controlling behavior.

 

[LittleRose]

Tammy has shown utter rage and hatred toward HE,that is why, "many on this forum" feel the way that we do. It doesn't mean that we are biased against women nor are we doing a,"disservice to our gender". You feel that SM is a,b and c and did x,y and z...yet no one is calling you a man hater. Again,we all have different opinions and there is no need for you to bash those who don't share your opinions. As I said before,agree to disagree.

Tammy showed her rage verbally, which is more common for women (men are more likely to rage physically).

I'm the mother of 4 boys. I love and appreciate men and understand the differences in the sexes (due to genes/hormones/societal expectations/upbringing).

My point is that, statistically, HE is much more likely to have died at SM's hands, and it saddens me that there is a societal tendency in women to demonize a woman over a man.

Where is the SISTERHOOD we, as women, need and deserve?

Why is that point made considered "bashing"?




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[Ellee]

Tammy has shown utter rage and hatred toward HE,that is why, "many on this forum" feel the way that we do. It doesn't mean that we are biased against women nor are we doing a,"disservice to our gender". You feel that SM is a,b and c and did x,y and z...yet no one is calling you a man hater. Again,we all have different opinions and there is no need for you to bash those who don't share your opinions. As I said before,agree to disagree.

Tammy has been quite outspoken with her disdain for HE, and SM has not. But in my opinion, I think some people have used SM's silence to fill in their own blanks. SM not outwardly showing rage and hatred the same way TM did doesn't mean he didn't have those same feelings.

 

[Motherof5]

Tammy showed her rage verbally, which is more common for women (men are more likely to rage physically).

I'm the mother of 4 boys. I love and appreciate men and understand the differences in the sexes (due to genes/hormones/societal expectations/upbringing).

My point is that, statistically, HE is much more likely to have died at SM's hands, and it saddens me that there is a societal tendency in women to demonize a woman over a man.

Where is the SISTERHOOD we, as women, need and deserve?

Why is that point made considered "bashing"?




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"As an adult woman, I notice women tend to demonize a woman over a man. Both TM and HE probably did this. IMO, many on this forum are too."

You are implying that anyone who thinks that TM is capable of murder is somehow demonizing TM,as you said before,and now, women in general. You then say that we are doing a disservice to women by feeling the way that we do about TM. If we don't share your opinions,we are demonizing women and doing them a disservice. Where is the SISTERHOOD? Sorry,I don't include female murderers in my sisterhood. TM showed rage verbally and she's charged with murder as well so LE must believe that she's not a sweetheart.

 

[Motherof5]

Tammy has been quite outspoken with her disdain for HE, and SM has not. But in my opinion, I think some people have used SM's silence to fill in their own blanks. SM not outwardly showing rage and hatred the same way TM did doesn't mean he didn't have those same feelings.

I completely respect your opinion.

 

[EireK]

I find it easy to believe that within the workplace he was able likable person. I believe that is no insight to his personal life. I believe anything the outside world saw is just a facade. As much so as all of TM dead trees and over landscaped front yard. JMO

BBM
I am inclined to think the opposite. I think that he must have taken so much pride in his work because it's the only time he was free to be himself. Otherwise, TM ruled all. Perhaps with HE he also felt free and that's why he (possibly) couldn't shelf the relationship. Of course I don't think this makes him any less culpable... if there were any time he should have stood up to TM and taken control, it should have been when the murder occurred.

JMO of course