Internet fury after customer describes on Facebook how salon owner 'made mom and her

[FrayedKnot]

I do have to wonder if other patrons were complaining to the owner about the child's behavior. Perhaps, not knowing that the child had Aspergers, they asked the owner to please "do something", and perhaps, not knowing that the child has Asperger's, the owner tried to still serve the child and keep her other clients happy.

I mean, I don't know, I wasn't there, but as a former waitress I have had patrons demand that I "do something" about screaming kids. It's a very awkward situation and someone is going to take it out on YOU, no matter what.

And unless anyone knew the family or the mom said that the boy was autistic, no one would have any way of knowing that he couldn't help his behavior.

I just try to see things both ways.

 

[FrayedKnot]

Just saw Duchess' post about the owner screaming, so there goes my theory that she was trying to comply to other clients complaints. Oops.

So everyone was AWARE the child has autism and that was why he was acting that way......that's not okay.

 

[TheDuchess]

I think the best thing is to actually read the original FB post that started the firestorm. Obviously, I cannot quote it, so here it is:


https://www.facebook.com/vanessa.hunt.526/posts/10103414475700144

 

[TheDuchess]

https://www.facebook.com/vanessa.hunt.526/posts/10103414475700144

I can't quote it, but this is the original FB post that started the firestorm. Read what she wrote and then judge for yourself. But it seems to me that the salon owner simply doesn't know how to treat other people at all.

The owner did actually issue a statement with somewhat of an apology and a plea not to boycott her business for the sake of her employees.

http://wwmt.com/news/features/featured/stories/mspa-owner-issues-statement-1022.shtml

In my opinion-what should happen rather than a FB boycott-there should be a huge call from other area salons to offer jobs to the stylists at this salon so that they can quit the place and let the owner fend for herself.

From reviewing the Yelp posts, this is not the first time she has yelled at customers, including children, so I have absolutely no pity for her. But it would be really awesome to see her employees leave her for other salons, as I am sure if she treats customers and children like this, I can only imagine the way she treats her employees!

 

[Tugela]

And you are wrong...a spa is a PUBLIC business open to the PUBLIC. They cannot choose to refuse service to anyone simply because of a disability. They need to accommodate the patron.

They can't refuse service for having a disability, but they can for causing a disruption.

Having a disability does not give someone the right to cause a disruption.

 

[TheDuchess]

They can't refuse service for having a disability, but they can for causing a disruption.

Having a disability does not give someone the right to cause a disruption.

Look...read the FB post and follow the story. The child was crying. They could hardly even hear him over the music. But they had no problem hearing the owner berating the mother. Do the math. What this woman did was absolutely horrid and she has a history of this type of behavior. I really don't know the legal ramifications of this, but what she did was completely out of line-so much so that people are boycotting her business.

In this country, we protect our children, in particular those with disabilities, and regardless of the law, us mama bears and papa bears are going to stand up for our littlest and most vulnerable ones. This woman's response? A ridiculous "apology" statement filled with excuses and woe is me...from her lawyer. I have no pity.

I just hope these workers are able to get out of their contracts or are hired by other salons willing to step of to the plate. If she tries suing them for leaving, she will have another PR nightmare on her hands for trying to stop people from earning a living in a right-to-work state. Go for it lady.

And don't worry too much about her-she is an heir to Motts Farms. She'll be fine.

 

[HMSHood]

Look...read the FB post and follow the story. The child was crying. They could hardly even hear him over the music. But they had no problem hearing the owner berating the mother. Do the math. What this woman did was absolutely horrid and she has a history of this type of behavior. I really don't know the legal ramifications of this, but what she did was completely out of line-so much so that people are boycotting her business.

In this country, we protect our children, in particular those with disabilities, and regardless of the law, us mama bears and papa bears are going to stand up for our littlest and most vulnerable ones. This woman's response? A ridiculous "apology" statement filled with excuses and woe is me...from her lawyer. I have no pity.

I just hope these workers are able to get out of their contracts or are hired by other salons willing to step of to the plate. If she tries suing them for leaving, she will have another PR nightmare on her hands for trying to stop people from earning a living in a right-to-work state. Go for it lady.

And don't worry too much about her-she is an heir to Motts Farms. She'll be fine.

Is she really the heir to Motts Farms? Just asking.

 

[TheDuchess]

Is she really the heir to Motts Farms? Just asking.

Well...I believe she is, but to be clear, I'm not talking about Mott's the applesauce company-but rather a large family owned farm in SW Michigan that raises Christmas trees, etc..but she's still loaded.

 

[BeginnersLuck]

I used to go to a restaurant until I saw this same behavior by a woman toward her staff. I knew one of the waitresses so I heard all the horrors behind the scene. I haven't gone to the establishment since.

The woman's behavior was completely out of line. I am speaking from my own customer service experience. There are multiple ways she could have handled this differently. Causing a scene in front of other customers, bringing a woman to tears and certainly frightening this small child is unacceptable.

I have seen many toddlers scream when they get a haircut. Disabled or not. The owner could have had a policy in place for young children. She could have had a separate location in her spa that young children got their hair cut if she chose to cater to that age group. If the owner had experienced similar problems in the past, then she should have implemented a policy, not blown up on a customer.

As far high scale restaurants go, I would be unhappy if I went out for dinner and the table next to me had screaming children. Luckily in my city the high scale restaurants are 21 and over or they have separate family rooms. Again, I think this is the restaurants responsibility to implement procedures to ensure that their customers have a relaxing dining experience and will frequent their business again.

I remember times when my daughter was a toddler and if she was acting up, I would pay the bill and get the food to go. So yes, there are always going to be some situations where the parent should take responsibility and not just ignore children's behavior when out in public. I see this happen occasionally, but this is not the kind of issue that is being discussed here.

How the owner chose to react to the situation is the problem.

 

[HMSHood]

I used to go to a restaurant until I saw this same behavior by a woman toward her staff. I knew one of the waitresses so I heard all the horrors behind the scene. I haven't gone to the establishment since.

The woman's behavior was completely out of line. I am speaking from my own customer service experience. There are multiple ways she could have handled this differently. Causing a scene in front of other customers, bringing a woman to tears and certainly frightening this small child is unacceptable.

I have seen many toddlers scream when they get a haircut. Disabled or not. The owner could have had a policy in place for young children. She could have had a separate location in her spa that young children got their hair cut if she chose to cater to that age group. If the owner had experienced similar problems in the past, then she should have implemented a policy, not blown up on a customer.

As far high scale restaurants go, I would be unhappy if I went out for dinner and the table next to me had screaming children. Luckily in my city the high scale restaurants are 21 and over or they have separate family rooms. Again, I think this is the restaurants responsibility to implement procedures to ensure that their customers have a relaxing dining experience and will frequent their business again.

I remember times when my daughter was a toddler and if she was acting up, I would pay the bill and get the food to go. So yes, there are always going to be some situations where the parent should take responsibility and not just ignore children's behavior when out in public. I see this happen occasionally, but this is not the kind of issue that is being discussed here.

How the owner chose to react to the situation is the problem.

You would think with social media, people would be more careful, especially in the past 10 or so years. Some people just do not learn and get it.

The restaurant you mentioned reminds me of Amy's Baking Company, which is run by some people who are abusive to their customers. Sad fact is there are many like that out there.

 

[Tugela]

Look...read the FB post and follow the story. The child was crying. They could hardly even hear him over the music. But they had no problem hearing the owner berating the mother. Do the math. What this woman did was absolutely horrid and she has a history of this type of behavior. I really don't know the legal ramifications of this, but what she did was completely out of line-so much so that people are boycotting her business.

In this country, we protect our children, in particular those with disabilities, and regardless of the law, us mama bears and papa bears are going to stand up for our littlest and most vulnerable ones. This woman's response? A ridiculous "apology" statement filled with excuses and woe is me...from her lawyer. I have no pity.

I just hope these workers are able to get out of their contracts or are hired by other salons willing to step of to the plate. If she tries suing them for leaving, she will have another PR nightmare on her hands for trying to stop people from earning a living in a right-to-work state. Go for it lady.

And don't worry too much about her-she is an heir to Motts Farms. She'll be fine.

She is still entitled to kick out someone causing a disruption, and she is not required to be nice about it. It's her place of business, if something is annoying her it doesn't matter if other people there are fine with it - she still gets the final say. Not sure why people are confused about that or think there is something wrong about it.

She has not done anything wrong. The problem is that some people have decided that she should have had to put up with the disruption, and when she did not, they are attempting to punish her for it. There is a word for that - it is called "bullying".

 

[Sonya610]

She has not done anything wrong. The problem is that some people have decided that she should have had to put up with the disruption, and when she did not, they are attempting to punish her for it. There is a word for that - it is called "bullying".

Another odd thing, if the owner supposedly started yelling at this woman and berating her horribly, and her behavior shocked all of the other patrons etc....

Why didn't any of the other patrons intervene to calm the situation down? Even just saying "He's just a little upset over the haircut...no big deal" would have done a lot to settle things if the scene was that over the top.

Instead the family (including the husband) walked out quietly and no other patrons said anything. The story gets retold and becomes a big deal afterwards.

I have started using a small 2 chair salon the last couple of years, when I started going there I told them straight up one of the reasons I stopped using their main competitor (a larger salon that is pricier) is because they often had large families with loud children hanging around and making lots of noise. I told them I liked THEIR shop because it was quiet.

Both the stylists have kids, they do get kids in the salon sometimes but the children are quiet and well behaved. They know darn well if that changed I would stop patronizing them.

The bottom line is some people think because they have to deal with a child that has annoying behavioral problems...or is just loud and obnoxious for various reasons....and they have to deal with that child and the behavior EVERY DAY .....the rest of the world OWES IT TO THEM to suffer along with them. Sorry, that is not always the case!

 

[ArianeEmory]

The only reason I ever jumped into this thread, by the way, is that the original article is written in an extremely skewed way, with no attempt to be objective or provide details of what actually happened. They are careful never to tell us what caused the problem, they are careful not to tell us what the owner actually *said*. It reads like someone HOPING to start another "Amy's Baking" sensation.

Also, you can find negative commentary for almost any business on Yelp. Yes, the owner could be a total witch, but customers and employees are welcome to go elsewhere--no one deserves to be the target of an Internet lynch mob on the basis of so little data and no actual crime committed. Bullying goes both ways in this one.

 

[TheDuchess]

She is still entitled to kick out someone causing a disruption, and she is not required to be nice about it. It's her place of business, if something is annoying her it doesn't matter if other people there are fine with it - she still gets the final say. Not sure why people are confused about that or think there is something wrong about it.

She has not done anything wrong. The problem is that some people have decided that she should have had to put up with the disruption, and when she did not, they are attempting to punish her for it. There is a word for that - it is called "bullying".

BBM-No-she isn't "required" to be nice to anyone, but if word gets out that she is rude and mean to her customers and to children, people are entitled not to patronize her salon.

I disagree-no matter what the situation, it is never just OK to be rude to a customer, and especially a small child, regardless of how the child is "behaving." She accepted the appointment for a child who has been there before, is known to be autistic and behaved like a 2 year old autistic child is supposed to behave.

While she may not have done anything "illegal" what she did is reprehensible in the minds and hearts of many people who choose to take the side of an innocent child and his mother over some uppity rude salon owner.

JMO

 

[TheDuchess]

The only reason I ever jumped into this thread, by the way, is that the original article is written in an extremely skewed way, with no attempt to be objective or provide details of what actually happened. They are careful never to tell us what caused the problem, they are careful not to tell us what the owner actually *said*. It reads like someone HOPING to start another "Amy's Baking" sensation.

Also, you can find negative commentary for almost any business on Yelp. Yes, the owner could be a total witch, but customers and employees are welcome to go elsewhere--no one deserves to be the target of an Internet lynch mob on the basis of so little data and no actual crime committed. Bullying goes both ways in this one.

It's really not that there were negative comments on Yelp. It's that the previous comments on Yelp were along the exact type of behavior she is being accused of now-being completely rude to young children. It really shows a "pattern of behavior" and if there are already several unrelated stories showing this type of behavior, one can infer that there are several other stories out there that have been unreported.

This woman is a shrew and needs to take a good hard look in the mirror and stop pointing fingers at people who are trying to ruin her business. She is doing a fine job of that on her own.

Oh...and by the way...of the thousands of salons out there in the world, with clients who bring in children, even behaviorally challenged children, without incident. Most people in this world know how to deal with even the most unruly "problem clients" without being unprofessional and mean to the point of embarrassment.

As far as the article, that is probably a good critique, that is why I posted the link to the actual FB post for the entire story from one completely uninvolved patron who witnessed this. It is important to note that the mother didn't do this, it was a concerned witness.

 

[TheDuchess]

Another odd thing, if the owner supposedly started yelling at this woman and berating her horribly, and her behavior shocked all of the other patrons etc....

Why didn't any of the other patrons intervene to calm the situation down? Even just saying "He's just a little upset over the haircut...no big deal" would have done a lot to settle things if the scene was that over the top.

Instead the family (including the husband) walked out quietly and no other patrons said anything. The story gets retold and becomes a big deal afterwards.

I have started using a small 2 chair salon the last couple of years, when I started going there I told them straight up one of the reasons I stopped using their main competitor (a larger salon that is pricier) is because they often had large families with loud children hanging around and making lots of noise. I told them I liked THEIR shop because it was quiet.

Both the stylists have kids, they do get kids in the salon sometimes but the children are quiet and well behaved. They know darn well if that changed I would stop patronizing them.

The bottom line is some people think because they have to deal with a child that has annoying behavioral problems...or is just loud and obnoxious for various reasons....and they have to deal with that child and the behavior EVERY DAY .....the rest of the world OWES IT TO THEM to suffer along with them. Sorry, that is not always the case!

BBM-now this statement just scares me. The bottom line is that you have a choice-they do not.

So what do you suggest for the parent of a child with a behavioral disorder such as autism or aspergers, etc... Should they just keep their child at home?

http://www.autismspeaks.org/

 

[especiallyheather]

Having a disability does not give someone the right to cause a disruption.

Obviously you have never had an autistic child? A child that is sweet and loving one minute and then screams because "the lights are burning" her skin. Imagine having to have your socks "just so" because they hurt the tops and bottoms of you feet. Then imagine not having the words to communicate how much those socks hurt, and having to resort to stomping your feet and screaming because you cant relay what is hurting you. Imagine the looks, the comments, the glares that would be given. Imagine not understanding why every one is upset, You just want your socks to stop hurting your feet. Now, imagine that 10-15 times a day.

I could go on and on with examples, but obviously you know better than a mom who has had a child like that. Right?

Try being a mother of the child whom you say "doesn't have the right" to react to the environment around them THE ONLY WAY THEY KNOW HOW.

Better yet, try being that child. :frown:

 

[mysticrose]

Being the mother of a son with Autism I have been through this scenario before myself on more then one ocassion. I was asked to leave a dining establishment, with the owner tounge lashing and upsetting the situation worse and loud enough for everyone to hear.The woman was on me within less then 5 mins of my son crying and I never had a chance to rectify what was happening, hell she never even offered us to go boxes for our food that had just showed up but insisted on us paying for our meals before we left. I have never been back and we ate there at least once a week with a family of four, never had a issue. I told her to her face loud enough for everyone to hear that I would never be back due to her behavior and perhaps she should take note.

The bottom line is if she would have came to me in a calm manner and not bringing in the whole resturant into it, I would still go there. It was humiliating and degrading. There are ways to take care of things without bringing people down in front of everyone else, in an adult manner not like your 5 years old throwing a tantrum...........

I can guarantee that anyone here would be appalled if talked to in this manner kid or not, it is NOT acceptable behavior on anyones part to talk to anyone like that. THAT is being a bully, as well as showing your ignorance level for everyone else to see........ moo

I plan on making up cards I can hand to people that say, "My son has Autism, What's your problem ?"

Mystic

 

[mysticrose]

Obviously you have never had an autistic child? A child that is sweet and loving one minute and then screams because "the lights are burning" her skin. Imagine having to have your socks "just so" because they hurt the tops and bottoms of you feet. Then imagine not having the words to communicate how much those socks hurt, and having to resort to stomping your feet and screaming because you cant relay what is hurting you. Imagine the looks, the comments, the glares that would be given. Imagine not understanding why every one is upset, You just want your socks to stop hurting your feet. Now, imagine that 10-15 times a day.

I could go on and on with examples, but obviously you know better than a mom who has had a child like that. Right?

Try being a mother of the child whom you say "doesn't have the right" to react to the environment around them THE ONLY WAY THEY KNOW HOW.

Better yet, try being that child. :frown:

Couldn't have said it better myself, Thank you !

 

[x_files]

I do have to wonder if other patrons were complaining to the owner about the child's behavior. Perhaps, not knowing that the child had Aspergers, they asked the owner to please "do something", and perhaps, not knowing that the child has Asperger's, the owner tried to still serve the child and keep her other clients happy.

I mean, I don't know, I wasn't there, but as a former waitress I have had patrons demand that I "do something" about screaming kids. It's a very awkward situation and someone is going to take it out on YOU, no matter what.

And unless anyone knew the family or the mom said that the boy was autistic, no one would have any way of knowing that he couldn't help his behavior.

I just try to see things both ways.

If someone is disrupting the other customers they can be asked to leave. Unfortunately, screaming toddlers are not a relaxing experience at a salon. Maybe the owner could have dealt with it more calmly, but salons are private businesses and can ask anyone to leave at any time.

I love well behaved kids but not out-of-control children.
There's salons that specialize in toddler haircuts.

I feel bad for waitresses that are demanded to do something when it's the parents responsibility to remove the child immediately if acting up.