Why isn't little RJ in his mothers custody?

[Flossie JMO]

I dunno, last time afaik that LE was at the Griffis/Sheffield property they found crack in a vehicle, not safe imo

 

[Whisperer]

I would like the story on this crack in the car resolved.
If that was Marie's car, I don't think she would be driving a school bus. If that was Crystals, did she get arrested? Did chad?

What is the story with this drug being in a car?

I agree crack is not safe but neither is leaving your child with a person who is not skilled in 911 or emergencies. A person who is young and not educated and has issues. To leave children with this type of person is called negligence and a tragedy could occur. If I recall, that was stated for the record, that a the children would not be safe in the Cummings home. No one listened or read or cared enough to wait on a decision.

 

[PorcineGranny]

Personally,I think that custody is somewhat of a wash. Both parents and their spouses/fiances have had drug issues. We could argue about which has had more, but we really don't know because there may be some juvenile records to which we have no access. It's very clear that both kids love both their parents, based upon many, many photos and videos and a few recent news videos we have seen. There have been lots of rumors and slander on both sides, the vast majority of which I believe to be false.

Ron had the better ability to provide a living for these children because he generally had a job, whereas Crystal did not. He also had a driver's license and satisfactory childcare arrangements. We know that Crystal did not originally have a driver's license and we do not know what childcare arrangements she might have been able to provide, should she have ever gotten a job. We also do not know what other information the judge may have had that we don't know about.

All in all, it's unusual for a judge to award custody to the father over the mother. There are some that feel that Ron cleverly stole custody out from under Crystal, but I have to assume that the judge did his job properly. I'm sure that he was smart enough to see through any tricks that Ron might have pulled, if Ron was smart enough to pull some. Based on the custody hearing transcript, I felt that Ron came across as more capable and had his ducks lined up, whereas Crystal did not. I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but this was my impression and at the time, I knew nothing about either of them.

Kamky, I don't have to answer the first couple of paragraphs because others conveyed my feelings so well. But to the statement that you are sure the Judge was smart enough to do his job properly, I have to take exception.
Judges are bought and sold every day, they make decisions on whose lawyer they like the most. Some are total idiots as we witnessed that one in Vermont letting a child molester go. They are just average people, with the same ideas or work ethics that we all have. Some don't care at all, some do.
Theres more of those that don't care. I don't want to put you in that file in my head as one that thinks just because someone has education and a position they are more intelligent or make better decisions than others.
Cause when it comes to judges, they are lawyers and there is no lower scum on this earth than many of them. These are just my opinions.:twocents:

 

[CeeKer]

I stay downstairs most of the time because I do not see the need for conflict, nor do I like it.

I just want to post my opinion on this thread as well. I do not feel Ronald should have custody of little Jr. because of his record and the fact that he was living with what I would call a child. From the bottom of my heart, I believe that Crystal was railroaded in the custody issue.

For anyone who does not think that Crystal is a good mother, just watch her heartbreak over little Haleigh. You can see it and feel it. Now she knows she may never see little Haleigh again. What a horrible thing to have to know. Something of this magnitude will make you look at life so differently. It will make you get your priorities in order. It will make you realize how very fragile life really is. This entire thing has literally made Crystal physically sick. I just have not seen this depth from Ronald.

Anyway, what I really mean to state is that I honestly do not feel that Jr. is getting the type of attention he needs and deserves with all of the drama surrounding Ronald and Misty. I feel Jr.'s situation is one that could become explosive at any moment in the household he is in now. I would love to see him with Crystal. I would know he was safe and had the benefit of being around other children. He would be out in the country free to run and play like other children.

I cannot even think a nice thought about Misty, knowing she has held up the investigation in finding Haleigh and will not make even one statement that is 100% true, so I will not keep on where she is concerned.

Gb Haleigh, Jr., Crystal, and Marie. May they have the strength to go through each day. There is a chance Haleigh may still be alive, IMO. There is that hope they can cling to as well as to each other.

JMO, MOO

Re: BBM I respectfully disagree. IMO the custody issue took two years from beginning to end, with ample time for the Sheffields to avoid any railroading issues and clear up any misstatements made by either party in the original Dec. '05 hearing. I have linked the court time line information many times before. The recent DCF investigation, with KP at the helm, had to be indepth and throrough... the world, so to speak was watching. I know things "slip by" DCF all the time, but how realistic is that happening in a high profile case like this??? Not likely IMO.

CS hasn't filed for a change in physical custody yet since Haleigh's gone missing. Why?

As far as Ronald's record, IRRC there are plenty of people in CS's life that have quite the records as well, some more recent than RCs... A "friends" crack in a car on their property, so how "free" should little RJ "be out in the country free to run and play like other children" on the Griffis/Sheffield property.

Re my 2nd BBM. I have no clue what kind of mother CS is. True she hasn't lost any children in the middle of the night under a yet to be determined scenario. But she has lost 2 children in a lengthy court battle. She choose to move an hour and half away from them even tho she latter claimed they were living with an abusive man. She neglected to support her children for years. If a man did that, no matter what the circumstance, he would be slammed six ways from Sunday. She got angry and indignant about negative media attention on herself while LE was searching a dumpster for her daughter. She didn't know what hours her daughter was in school, a fact that was readily available to her w/o going thru RC. She drove a car with Chloe in it, when she had suffered a previous seizure(s) and was under great stress...even tho she has "ample" family in the area and at her tent to drive her at that time. She prodded her son to tell C. Rivera on national TV the circumstances of his sister's disappearance, asking him to relive probably the worst night of his little life.

Even CS, when originally confronted about a 17 year old babystitting her children, admitted she couldn't say anything because she was 17 when she had Haleigh.

Yes I am sure she is heartbroken, as I believe are all the people who love Haleigh, warts and all.

I am sure both RC and CS wish they had made some different choices in their life.

 

[KOOL LOOK]

Re: BBM I respectfully disagree. IMO the custody issue took two years from beginning to end, with ample time for the Sheffields to avoid any railroading issues and clear up any misstatements made by either party in the original Dec. '05 hearing. I have linked the court time line information many times before. The recent DCF investigation, with KP at the helm, had to be indepth and throrough... the world, so to speak was watching. I know things "slip by" DCF all the time, but how realistic is that happening in a high profile case like this??? Not likely IMO.

CS hasn't filed for a change in physical custody yet since Haleigh's gone missing. Why?

As far as Ronald's record, IRRC there are plenty of people in CS's life that have quite the records as well, some more recent than RCs... A "friends" crack in a car on their property, so how "free" should little RJ "be out in the country free to run and play like other children" on the Griffis/Sheffield property.

Re my 2nd BBM. I have no clue what kind of mother CS is. True she hasn't lost any children in the middle of the night under a yet to be determined scenario. But she has lost 2 children in a lengthy court battle. She choose to move an hour and half away from them even tho she latter claimed they were living with an abusive man. She neglected to support her children for years. If a man did that, no matter what the circumstance, he would be slammed six ways from Sunday. She got angry and indignant about negative media attention on herself while LE was searching a dumpster for her daughter. She didn't know what hours her daughter was in school, a fact that was readily available to her w/o going thru RC. She drove a car with Chloe in it, when she had suffered a previous seizure(s) and was under great stress...even tho she has "ample" family in the area and at her tent to drive her at that time. She prodded her son to tell C. Rivera on national TV the circumstances of his sister's disappearance, asking him to relive probably the worst night of his little life.

Even CS, when originally confronted about a 17 year old babystitting her children, admitted she couldn't say anything because she was 17 when she had Haleigh.

Yes I am sure she is heartbroken, as I believe are all the people who love Haleigh, warts and all.

I am sure both RC and CS wish they had made some different choices in their life.

BBM You ain't kiddin. That man would be in jail, Hell and froze over. There's a double standard in the courts concerning mothers paying their child support versus the father and it needs to stop. I worked 70 hours a week from the age of 18 to 30 years old. Maybe that's why I only had time to give birth to one, I was too busy working too support her. Not to mention must women's court ordered child support averages 28.00 to 32.00 a week around here plus the 5.00 service court fee. Then they won't throw them in jail because they don't see how it would benefit the child or the other ones shes had since then. Let the man do it, though. That's where the laws of the land are in error.

 

[elle1919]

Our "feelings" about Ronald and Crystal do not matter. I do not share in the opinion that Crystal is weak and feels helpless. The evidence that I have seen to help me arrive at my opinion of Crystal can be found in her own statements, not my own conclusions of her state of mind. She has never stated since February 9th 2009 that Ronald is an unfit parent. If I missed that somewhere feel free to point me in the direction of that statement. Although many proclaim to have been through situations that Crystal has been through, that does not give them better insight into the way Crystal herself feels.

Crystal's actions are the only real evidence to give insight into the way she feels. Right now, in my opinion, she seems to be focused on finding her missing child and overcome with grief. When she has the answers she seeks and the whereabouts of Haleigh are known, perhaps we will see a custody dispute or a petition to the court. But right now I can't understand the need to discuss what Crystal has herself put aside so that she can put all her efforts into waking up every morning and dealing with the fact that she is the mother of a missing child while trying to be a mother to Chloe and RJ who need her most of all. No, I will not assume that because of Crystal's inaction involving custody that she is weak or helpless or feels she is in a no win situation. With Haleigh gone I find it hard to understand how Crystal or Ronald for that matter can accomplish anything inside of a day. God Bless them both and give them the strength to endure what the rest of the world thinks has beaten them.

 

[snookie]

BBM You ain't kiddin. That man would be in jail, Hell and froze over. There's a double standard in the courts concerning mothers paying their child support versus the father and it needs to stop. I worked 70 hours a week from the age of 18 to 30 years old. Maybe that's why I only had time to give birth to one, I was too busy working too support her. Not to mention must women's court ordered child support averages 28.00 to 32.00 a week around here plus the 5.00 service court fee. Then they won't throw them in jail because they don't see how it would benefit the child or the other ones shes had since then. Let the man do it, though. That's where the laws of the land are in error.

BBM

I strongly disagree, Kool Look. I've known plenty of women who do not receive the child support they are owed, and the ex husbands never go to jail.

Crystal is now caught up on the past due child support, and is keeping her payments current. I do not understand why it continues to be such an issue with some people.

Why do you think she should be thrown in jail? She has little children who need her!

 

[KOOL LOOK]

BBM

I strongly disagree, Kool Look. I've known plenty of women who do not receive the child support they are owed, and the ex husbands never go to jail.

Crystal is now caught up on the past due child support, and is keeping her payments current. I do not understand why it continues to be such an issue with some people.

Why do you think she should be thrown in jail? She has little children who need her!

I'm delighted that you disagree.

But your post doesn't reflect what I said or it's meaning and intent to offer which is why I'm bothering to respond. I would prefer no parent of a small child go to jail.

 

[kiki the parrot]

The tragic reality is, the true wherabouts and actual cause of her daughter Haleigh's "vanishing" may never be known. And in the meantime what *I* can't understand is any need to postpone a change to a safer more secure environment for Junior. CS needs to focus not only upon locating her already "lost" child but upon the safety and wellbeing of Junior, unless she is willing to chance awakening one morning the mother of two mysteriously "missing" children. :frown: rayer: JMO
arrot:

 

[lorann]

With all of the drama going on, Misty & Ron fighting, searches going on for what we think is either a body or evidence that one was there, Misty going away (will Jr think she is lost too?), children overhear what they shouldn't and pick up on vibes, can he just go out in the yard and play with all of the media? TN said on TV they tell this child his Sissy will be back - is that wise? I wonder what their counselor thinks about this?

As sad as it is to me to say, making a big change right now may be too traumatic for Jr. If Misty is really gone, that may be the Cumming's way of saying they have him away from the guilty person. Jr had Amber, then she went away then Misty - now she has gone away. Jr loves his Mama. He visits the farm, has other kids to play with. If a move is made at a later date, he will not be thrown into a new situation.

 

[elle1919]

With all of the drama going on, Misty & Ron fighting, searches going on for what we think is either a body or evidence that one was there, Misty going away (will Jr think she is lost too?), children overhear what they shouldn't and pick up on vibes, can he just go out in the yard and play with all of the media? TN said on TV they tell this child his Sissy will be back - is that wise? I wonder what their counselor thinks about this?

As sad as it is to me to say, making a big change right now may be too traumatic for Jr. If Misty is really gone, that may be the Cumming's way of saying they have him away from the guilty person. Jr had Amber, then she went away then Misty - now she has gone away. Jr loves his Mama. He visits the farm, has other kids to play with. If a move is made at a later date, he will not be thrown into a new situation.

I do hope that Junior is in counseling and I agree with many of your points. If a move is made a later date and he is placed with Crystal that will of course be a familiar place for him and somewhere that might require less adjustment time. However, can you imagine the grief and despair of this precious child if he is removed from Crystal and Ronald? That could and has happened in the past when there is a dispute about who is the better parent. Such fragile circumstances and so many things to think about. Everyday I pray that God has his eyes upon these children and the people that love and give care to them.

 

[Clock's Tickin]

I know that I'm stomping all over personal freedoms as I walk into this one, but in what world would this child be "better off" with one chemically enhanced, barely educated, preoccupied, and hostile parent than another??? If there is a single family member with an ounce of maturity and enough rationale to put the child first, perhaps that person could step up until Haleigh is recovered and something that resembles a normal life can resume. Keep in mind how very rare it is for a judge to grant custody to a single father. It isn't as if Ron spent big bucks on better lawyers. That woman lost custody of her children because she was proven unfit. Ron, in this case, must have been the lesser of two evils by a long shot or a different living arrangement would've been found. Not to mention that he wanted the job! If my kids were ever (God Forbid) taken away from me, I'd have bought the house next door so fast I'd be helping the old occupants pack and move. I don't care where either parent is while the ponds are searched, but I'd hope one of them stayed with Jr.---I don't care who gets married, traumatic times bring people together and make them needy.---I do care that every single lying snake involved is still slithering around and hiding facts that may seem so small, but could mean so much. The best thing anyone could do for Jr. right now is to come clean, COMPLETELY, because all of them know something (even if some of them don't think that what they know will help) they aren't saying--and the sooner Haleigh is found, the sooner Jr. and his family can begin to heal.

 

[kamky]

Kamky, I don't have to answer the first couple of paragraphs because others conveyed my feelings so well. But to the statement that you are sure the Judge was smart enough to do his job properly, I have to take exception.
Judges are bought and sold every day, they make decisions on whose lawyer they like the most. Some are total idiots as we witnessed that one in Vermont letting a child molester go. They are just average people, with the same ideas or work ethics that we all have. Some don't care at all, some do.
Theres more of those that don't care. I don't want to put you in that file in my head as one that thinks just because someone has education and a position they are more intelligent or make better decisions than others.
Cause when it comes to judges, they are lawyers and there is no lower scum on this earth than many of them. These are just my opinions.:twocents:

I agree with you that there are good judges and there are bad judges. Some are competent and some aren't. Some make good decisions and some don't. However, in the original custody decision, I feel that the judge must have put some solid consideration into his decision and there are likely factors that we don't know about that played into this decision. The reason I think this is that the judge didn't go the usual route and give custody to the mom. This makes me fairly sure that there was a very good reason for the decision to go this way.

In their recent review, DCF upheld the decision that Jr should stay with his father. Since this case is very much in the public eye, I believe they did a good analysis and were very careful about their decision.

My belief is still that Ron has been tremendously over portrayed as a villain in the media and on blogs and forums, for two reasons. First, it's clear that there was a smear campaign by certain people (and I don't believe that it was Crystal) to saturate the forums with negative rumors abut Ron and create a bad impression. This was very effective and has stuck to this day. Second, Ron is very uncomfortable in the public eye and does not come across well on camera. This has provided plenty of fodder for people to pick him apart and make negative comments. I believe that 90% of what is said about him is patently false. (I also discount most of the negative perceptions about Crystal).

It's important to be objective about both of these young parents and not get carried away with the hype!

This is not to say that I hold Ron up on a pedestal and think he's wonderful. He has made many mistakes in his young life and needs to think deeply about his actions and improve for the sake of his children. I wish he would get his GED, ensure he leads a drug-free life, improve his ethics, choose better friends, get a job, and faithfully attend church. All IMO. But, when I see pictures of his kids snuggling up against him and looking at his with adoration in their eyes, it's clear that they love him deeply and are happy in his care.

 

[Clock's Tickin]

I agree with you that there are good judges and there are bad judges. Some are competent and some aren't. Some make good decisions and some don't. However, in the original custody decision, I feel that the judge must have put some solid consideration into his decision and there are likely factors that we don't know about that played into this decision. The reason I think this is that the judge didn't go the usual route and give custody to the mom. This makes me fairly sure that there was a very good reason for the decision to go this way.

In their recent review, DCF upheld the decision that Jr should stay with his father. Since this case is very much in the public eye, I believe they did a good analysis and were very careful about their decision.

My belief is still that Ron has been tremendously over portrayed as a villain in the media and on blogs and forums, for two reasons. First, it's clear that there was a smear campaign by certain people (and I don't believe that it was Crystal) to saturate the forums with negative rumors abut Ron and create a bad impression. This was very effective and has stuck to this day. Second, Ron is very uncomfortable in the public eye and does not come across well on camera. This has provided plenty of fodder for people to pick him apart and make negative comments. I believe that 90% of what is said about him is patently false. (I also discount most of the negative perceptions about Crystal).

It's important to be objective about both of these young parents and not get carried away with the hype!

This is not to say that I hold Ron up on a pedestal and think he's wonderful. He has made many mistakes in his young life and needs to think deeply about his actions and improve for the sake of his children. I wish he would get his GED, ensure he leads a drug-free life, improve his ethics, choose better friends, get a job, and faithfully attend church. All IMO. But, when I see pictures of his kids snuggling up against him and looking at his with adoration in their eyes, it's clear that they love him deeply and are happy in his care.

Well said! But I also wish there were some way to medically alter our children to prevent them from making/having children of their own until they've graduated University and started their career. It just makes life soooo much harder, not only for the young parent, but also for the kids. It doesn't, however, make the love any less profound.

 

[atherella]

With all of the drama going on, Misty & Ron fighting, searches going on for what we think is either a body or evidence that one was there, Misty going away (will Jr think she is lost too?), children overhear what they shouldn't and pick up on vibes, can he just go out in the yard and play with all of the media? TN said on TV they tell this child his Sissy will be back - is that wise? I wonder what their counselor thinks about this?

As sad as it is to me to say, making a big change right now may be too traumatic for Jr. If Misty is really gone, that may be the Cumming's way of saying they have him away from the guilty person. Jr had Amber, then she went away then Misty - now she has gone away. Jr loves his Mama. He visits the farm, has other kids to play with. If a move is made at a later date, he will not be thrown into a new situation.

Do you know for a fact that "Misty is really gone away" and that "Ron & Misty are fighting"? There was a video the other day and the reporter stated she went to the door and Annette stated that Ron was away with Misty. Doesn't sound as if Ron and Misty are fighting to me. Doesn't sound as if Misty has been banished (for lack of a better word) from Junior's life.

Video found here:
http://www.actionnewsjax.com/conten...igh-case-revealed/zRoTNAbDikutk3i1JJQV_Q.cspx

(After the interview with NayNay's sister)

I do agree with you that moving Junior would be traumatic. Junior has lived with his father and his paternal side of the family since he was 6 months old. I think Junior loves his entire family and hopefully is receiving LOTS of love and support from his ENTIRE extended family.

 

[jaimie43]

I believe that when its all said and done and this case has come to a conclusion, Junior will be in Crystals custody and we will all have the answer.

 

[faefrost]

I agree with you that there are good judges and there are bad judges. Some are competent and some aren't. Some make good decisions and some don't. However, in the original custody decision, I feel that the judge must have put some solid consideration into his decision and there are likely factors that we don't know about that played into this decision. The reason I think this is that the judge didn't go the usual route and give custody to the mom. This makes me fairly sure that there was a very good reason for the decision to go this way.

In their recent review, DCF upheld the decision that Jr should stay with his father. Since this case is very much in the public eye, I believe they did a good analysis and were very careful about their decision.

My belief is still that Ron has been tremendously over portrayed as a villain in the media and on blogs and forums, for two reasons. First, it's clear that there was a smear campaign by certain people (and I don't believe that it was Crystal) to saturate the forums with negative rumors abut Ron and create a bad impression. This was very effective and has stuck to this day. Second, Ron is very uncomfortable in the public eye and does not come across well on camera. This has provided plenty of fodder for people to pick him apart and make negative comments. I believe that 90% of what is said about him is patently false. (I also discount most of the negative perceptions about Crystal).

It's important to be objective about both of these young parents and not get carried away with the hype!

This is not to say that I hold Ron up on a pedestal and think he's wonderful. He has made many mistakes in his young life and needs to think deeply about his actions and improve for the sake of his children. I wish he would get his GED, ensure he leads a drug-free life, improve his ethics, choose better friends, get a job, and faithfully attend church. All IMO. But, when I see pictures of his kids snuggling up against him and looking at his with adoration in their eyes, it's clear that they love him deeply and are happy in his care.

I agree that the judge probably did take everything that was put before him into consideration and make a reasonable informed decision based on the facts at hand. Regardless of whether we think she was railroaded or not, Crystal contributed greatly to not having custody of her kids and continues to do so. She voices unfounded claims and rumors before the court with no basis in evidence or witnesses. This alone tends to give judges pause. While I am sure she loves her children I am also not convinced that she was or is to this day in a position to supply a stable nurturing environment for them.

This is not to say that I think the judges decision in awarding custody to Ron was ultimately a good thing. His child disapeared while in the care of the underaged teenaged live in babysitter who he was having an ongoing sexual relationship with. This almost by definition is waht we would describe as "not a stable nurturing environment" for the kids. If he had been a corporate executive who was carrying on such a relationship with the teenaged babysitter we would be completely up in arms. But because he married the still underaged babysitter when his child went missing it's all ok? uhhuh?

Honestly is there a viable third option for custody and guardianship that does not involve these two or state foster care? It's times like this that we should be glad that we all aren't judges who have to make these sorts of decisions.

 

[snookie]

I'm delighted that you disagree.

But your post doesn't reflect what I said or it's meaning and intent to offer which is why I'm bothering to respond. I would prefer no parent of a small child go to jail.

Thank you! I too am delighted that we disagree.

Out of curiosity, how does my post not reflect what you said?

Did you not say that there is a double standard regarding non-child support paying mothers vs. fathers?

 

[Whisperer]

Thank you Jaimie43.....needed to read those words.

 

[Whisperer]

Glad to read what you had to say LaLaw...you are right on target as usual.
Despite the fact that we are told that JR is in the loving and caring arms of his father, some of us know better. I keep in mind those loving and caring arms continually wrapped around the POI in his daughter's disappearance....I think the PICS of him and Misty say it all.