No family is perfect, but a major difference between a typical family and an enmeshed one is controlling the thoughts and choices of your children or preventing what psychologists call "separation and individuation" in late adolescence. The goal of raising kids is to raise individuals who have their own minds and make their own choices. That doesn't mean we don't worry or help them or do what we can.
I''m no expert on the Rhodens, but Chris, Sr. helped his family members, even buying a home for his ex-wife and building an addition, which gave Hanna a place to bring Kylie. That's support. He didn't pick her boyfriends or try to isolate Sophia from the Wagners. Chris's cousin was living with him and from all accounts, various Rhodens, Manleys, and Gilleys could come and go. Nobody in the Rhoden family was trying to control Jake or Hannah Hazel.
It's a huge mistake to project our own healthy, normal experiences--which can cover a range of lifestyles and relationship patterns--onto a family who has committed mass murder. When you are dealing with people who are disordered in some way (in this case, a family that habitually engages in obvious anti-social behavior), we risk minimizing their crimes when we overlay our own mostly healthy choices over their criminally inclined ones.