13 yr old under 4' tall becomes a father

[Mr. E]

So was this a girl a "Free Range Child"

I don't think so...from what I've read, it sounds like the mom knew what was happening. Weren't boys staying at the girl's house?

 

[Boyz_Mum]

The part of the article that says the "father of the baby" thought that Chantel would take the "morning after pill to take care of it" literally made me sick.

 

[Mr. E]

Earlier in the year, a student of mine wrote a paper on birth control. The paper was very slanted toward birth control being the girl's responsibility. I actually took the boy aside and talked to him about it. I told him a lot of things, including that it took two to make a baby, and if he was going to leave birth control up to the girl entirely, he should not be having sex. His attitude was very much that it was the girl's responsibilty entirely, even so much as to making sure condoms are used and used properly, since girls are the ones who get pregnant. Scarily, I think this is the attitude of a lot of teen boys.

 

[Boyz_Mum]

Earlier in the year, a student of mine wrote a paper on birth control. The paper was very slanted toward birth control being the girl's responsibility. I actually took the boy aside and talked to him about it. I told him a lot of things, including that it took two to make a baby, and if he was going to leave birth control up to the girl entirely, he should not be having sex. His attitude was very much that it was the girl's responsibilty entirely, even so much as to making sure condoms are used and used properly, since girls are the ones who get pregnant. Scarily, I think this is the attitude of a lot of teen boys.

Perhaps I'm a prude but we talk to our sons about sex (when it's age appropriate for them) and encourage them to save themselves for the right girl and when they can actually be a DAD. I realize it may seem unrealistic to think they'll listen, but with hope and encouragement maybe they'll hold off. We've had the condom discussion several times (triple wrap it if you need to, even if she "says" she's on the pill! ) Even dad/hubby encourages them to hold off~ I think it helps a lot when they hear "the coolest dad in the world" tell them to slow down.

Kudos to you Mr. E~ I hope your talk with that boy made a difference in how he views his share of responsibility when it comes to birth control. :blowkiss:

 

[southcitymom]

Earlier in the year, a student of mine wrote a paper on birth control. The paper was very slanted toward birth control being the girl's responsibility. I actually took the boy aside and talked to him about it. I told him a lot of things, including that it took two to make a baby, and if he was going to leave birth control up to the girl entirely, he should not be having sex. His attitude was very much that it was the girl's responsibilty entirely, even so much as to making sure condoms are used and used properly, since girls are the ones who get pregnant. Scarily, I think this is the attitude of a lot of teen boys.

I agree with you, Mr. E, and I appreciate your telling at least one future Lothario the real deal. But I have to say that I think it's the biology of the thing - the girls always carry the bullet. Like it or not, that's the way it is. We women have to think about it more because if we become pregnant, our life is always more altered in every way than the man who impregnated us. I hope I don't sound impossibly sexist - I'm trying to be a realist.

 

[southcitymom]

Perhaps I'm a prude but we talk to our sons about sex (when it's age appropriate for them) and encourage them to save themselves for the right girl and when they can actually be a DAD. I realize it may seem unrealistic to think they'll listen, but with hope and encouragement maybe they'll hold off. We've had the condom discussion several times (triple wrap it if you need to, even if she "says" she's on the pill! ) Even dad/hubby encourages them to hold off~ I think it helps a lot when they hear "the coolest dad in the world" tell them to slow down.

Kudos to you Mr. E~ I hope your talk with that boy made a difference in how he views his share of responsibility when it comes to birth control. :blowkiss:

I don't think it sounds prudish at all, Boyz_Mum - congrats to you and your spouse for putting it out there. Most adults will agree that it NEVER hurts to wait to become sexually active, but it OFTEN hurts to jump into it too soon.

I hope to send the same message to my boys - that waiting until you're mature enough to handle all the many consequences and responsibilities that can come with sex is the smartest thing. Still, I want them to know what we expect (in terms of protecting themselves and any partners) if they don't "wait." (everything from condoms to kindness)

 

[Lyn1001]

I've known more than one guy who became a father because the girl "said" she was on the pill. Of course, some of these guys are the same ones who tell the girl they have to get on the pill because they don't want to use condoms!!!! Boys need to realize that it's not soley the responsibility of the girl. Some females are unable to take birth control. I am one of those girls. I was actually put on birth control as a teen for other issues (I was not yet active), and found out that it wacks out my body and I can't take it. If some guy just assumed I was on it, there would have been a problem. HOWEVER, I agree with SCM that women do have make sure there is protection. If I was not married and began sleeping with a new guy, it would be my duty to inform him that I am not on the pill and I would have a condom with me. Plus, why, in this day and age, would you NOT use a condom unless you're in a commited, long term relationship or married??? Too many STD's!

 

[Truthful Lies]

SNIP We've had the condom discussion several times (triple wrap it if you need to, even if she "says" she's on the pill! ) SNIP :blowkiss:

I'm worried that you wrote to "Triple wrap it" and may be passing that along....that seriously increases the chances of the condom(s) breaking. Never should more than one condom be used per erection. I hope you were joking?

 

[Boyz_Mum]

I'm worried that you wrote to "Triple wrap it" and may be passing that along....that seriously increases the chances of the condom(s) breaking. Never should more than one condom be used per erection. I hope you were joking?

Yes, I was joking. We've discussed "body condoms"... etc. and that kind of talk is always in jest. If I had my preference, they'd never have their first kiss- let alone multiply! LOL!

 

[Truthful Lies]

Yes, I was joking. We've discussed "body condoms"... etc. and that kind of talk is always in jest. If I had my preference, they'd never have their first kiss- let alone multiply! LOL!

Lol....hence why I posted...I didn't catch the sarcasm and I know my Boyz Mum is brilliant (I was like, "hmmmm did a kid get on her keyboard?" !!! =)

 

[Boyz_Mum]

Lol....hence why I posted...I didn't catch the sarcasm and I know my Boyz Mum is brilliant (I was like, "hmmmm did a kid get on her keyboard?" !!! =)

Truthful Lies, you are too sweet! :blowkiss: