Emails From Cindy and her family

[wanttohelp]

Every time someone talks about these e-mails and when I read them, I think how scary and invasive FL's open records laws are. As interesting as it is to be a fly on these poor people's walls, it hard for me to see what right the public has to read these e-mails, as I admit I have. Why should the press or the public be able to intrude into these people's lives? The police may have a right as part of the investigation. Perhaps some could end up in court, but this case may never go to trial. Such open exposure of people's private affairs in the media and all over the Internet should be a cautionary tale for us all. I fear it will make it more and more likely that people will chose not to co-operate with the police. That's not good for any of us. Personally, I'm going to do a lot more 'reaching out' by phone and snail mail myself. Poor, poor Family who Casey drug into all this drama to have their personal corespondences put out there for all to see. It's hideous but I'm sure KC couldn't give a squirrel's whisker. What a sick tragedy.

I agree. I was thinking about this too. The person Sheila is emailing, I think it may be her sister, says many things about her family I bet she thought would never be seen.

 

[PhoneBoothBandit]

i can clearly see cindy actively abusing every individual's gawd given right to be bloody stupid, but not rick abusing her imo.
it's not as if rick felt his sister was in a bad relationship, or spending too much money, or eating food high in cholesterol. he could've taken months getting through to her with a softly, softly approach if anything like this was what he found himself faced with.
oh no, this was a full-blown four-alarm CATASTROPHE which had to be addressed NOW!
i'm sorry but in these circumstances i see nothing more here than a swift kick in the britches from a brother utterly desperate to drag his sister, kicking and screaming, if necessary, back into reality before she destroyed herself and what little was left of her family. (too late now)

Regardless of the circumstances, calling someone an idiot and stupid (repetitively) is abuse. You may not care because it's Cindy on the receiving end (and we'd all have liked to say it at one time or another) but it is still abuse. I think Cindy reacted to Rick's emails pretty calmly given the circumstances - she could have reacted in the same way each time, but she didn't.
Cindy didn't destroy herself or her family though. Did she delude herself? 'Absolutely'. Casey destroyed that family.

 

[eddeva]

Regardless of the circumstances, calling someone an idiot and stupid (repetitively) is abuse. You may not care because it's Cindy on the receiving end (and we'd all have liked to say it at one time or another) but it is still abuse. I think Cindy reacted to Rick's emails pretty calmly given the circumstances - she could have reacted in the same way each time, but she didn't.
Cindy didn't destroy herself or her family though. Did she delude herself? 'Absolutely'. Casey destroyed that family.

i'm sorry PhoneBoothBandit, i'll never see that as abuse. she's not a 5yr old that's being bullied or things i won't say. she was called an idiot--deal with it cindy! she's a strong willed woman thats, imo, driven her brother to distraction and anyway, i don't like the way the word 'abuse' is bandied about over trifles these days. it's used to describe such minor things that nobody pays attention to it anymore. a couple of years ago a child at my kids school told a teacher that his mother had threatened to put soap in his mouth if he said (you know the word--i won't post it) and the school called social services and reported it as a case of child abuse. now nobody takes the term seriously so if someone really is being abused it could be ignored or slipped by b/c nobody wants to look like the idiot that called in services ever again.
cindy can take care of herself--nobody is abusing that woman, imo. yes casey did destroy her family, but wouldn't the devastation have been far, far less if cindy had been physically gagged this whole time? she's made it a hundred times worse.

edited for grammar (could use more)

 

[darcedarce]

i'm sorry PhoneBoothBandit, i'll never see that as abuse. she's not a 5yr old that's being bullied or things i won't say. she was called an idiot--deal with it cindy! she's a strong willed woman thats, imo, driven her brother to distraction and anyway, i don't like the way the word 'abuse' is bandied about over trifles these days. it's used to describe such minor things that nobody pays attention to it anymore. a couple of years ago a child at my kids school told a teacher that his mother had threatened to put soap in his mouth if he said (you know the word--i won't post it) and the school called social services and reported it as a case of child abuse. now nobody takes the term seriously so if someone really is being abused it could be ignored or slipped by b/c nobody wants to look like the idiot that called in services ever again.
cindy can take care of herself--nobody is abusing that woman, imo.
yes casey did destroy her family, but wouldn't the devastation have been far, far less if cindy had been physically gagged this whole time? she's made it a hundred times worse.

I completely agree. It is not abuse, not at all.

 

[OneLostGrl]

JBean or another mod? If you are reading here- would you please consider merging this thread with the older thread about these same emails? It may help if we can refer back to the older posts from when the emails were first released as we go along?

Thank you in advance for your consideration!

 

[RR0004]

JBean or another mod? If you are reading here- would you please consider merging this thread with the older thread about these same emails? It may help if we can refer back to the older posts from when the emails were first released as we go along?

Thank you in advance for your consideration!

I think it may have been locked.

 

[RR0004]

Regardless of the circumstances, calling someone an idiot and stupid (repetitively) is abuse. You may not care because it's Cindy on the receiving end (and we'd all have liked to say it at one time or another) but it is still abuse. I think Cindy reacted to Rick's emails pretty calmly given the circumstances - she could have reacted in the same way each time, but she didn't.
Cindy didn't destroy herself or her family though. Did she delude herself? 'Absolutely'. Casey destroyed that family.

It is abusive...and very well may be indicative of how this family functioned. I don't think Cindy minced words with her daughter and vice versa (obviously!). You learn this kind of behavior. Personally, I think there was emotional abuse going on in that home...with everyone feeding off each other. Unless someone attempts to break the cycle, it will continue...and oftentimes escalates, as in when words don't work, try something else. IMO, I don't think Rick and Cindy had much of a relationship. I mean, who would stop talking to their brother because he dared to point out that he thought his niece was pregnant? And, he very well may not be blameless in this either. He may have embarrassed the dickens out of her. Who knows? I don't know what went on in that house, but I'm inclined to think whatever it was, it most definitely wasn't healthy.

 

[OneLostGrl]

I think it may have been locked.

ohh.. that sucks!

 

[eddeva]

It is abusive.

not to me. i think that those who have suffered true abuse may be offended to find the world sees one 50yr(ish) old calling another 50yr old an 'idiot' to be abuse.
'abuse' is a very loaded word which denotes great suffering, and i don't trot it out lightly. for me a handfull of irate emails with some rude words and a bit of name-calling during a period of emotional turmoil, between a couple of grown adults is not abuse.
drugging your daughter and leaving her gawd knows where so you can have louder sex with your boyfriend IS abuse.
to me there is a very large difference between the two and ne'er the twain shall meet.

 

[RR0004]

not to me. i think that those who have suffered true abuse may be offended to find the world sees one 50yr(ish) old calling another 50yr old an 'idiot' to be abuse.
'abuse' is a very loaded word which denotes great suffering, and i don't trot it out lightly. for me a handfull of irate emails with some rude words and a bit of name-calling during a period of emotional turmoil, between a couple of grown adults is not abuse.
drugging your daughter and leaving her gawd knows where so you can have louder sex with your boyfriend IS abuse.
to me there is a very large difference between the two and ne'er the twain shall meet.

Well then, speaking from knowing (unfortunately), I'm not offended. Emotional abuse is very real. Name calling, bullying all part of it. It may or may not be part of the bigger Anthony picture...time will tell.

PS- I love the way you write.

 

[eddeva]

Well then, speaking from knowing (unfortunately), I'm not offended. Emotional abuse is very real. Name calling, bullying all part of it. It may or may not be part of the bigger Anthony picture...time will tell.

PS- I love the way you write.

i'm terribly sorry to hear that RR0004. i'm sure you're right about the emotional abuse--the very thought of making your daughter's child call you mommy is unthinkably twisted to me, and were it an adult berating a child with such words as 'stupid' and 'idiot' then i wouldn't hesitate to scream ABUSE!
btw, thank you for the debate. i've never been anywhere that a difference of opinion (and we're all supposed to have or own or what's the point of a brain?) didn't result in my being soundly bashed

 

[wanttohelp]

I think it was pretty sick of cindy to tell caylee to call her mommy.

 

[yolorado]

Contrast Rick's approach to Cindy and George's approach to Casey. Rick told it like it was. Thank you Rick. Someone in her family needed to say those things to Cindy. Didn't work, but at least Rick didn't get sucked into the madness. On the other hand before and after a big blow up with KC re the stealing, which led to KC leaving, Cindy apparently had began to face up to the truth of KC, had talked to a therapist about her real feelings and it had come out to several of KC's 'friends'- to at least Ryan, Amy, TonE, earlier Jesse. She seemed to be capable of being down on Casey if she felt like it, but when Cindy and George got to KC in jail, it was all nicey, nice, clues, kid gloves, sweetness and light. It was so phony, I wanted to reach through the camera and throttle them. Their grandchild was missing. Their daughter was lying like a rug, making ABSOLUELY no sense, wasn't providing any coherrent information, wasn't co-operating to find a child she said had been kidnapped, wouldn't even talk about it to George and Cindy. KC implied it was to keep her family safe, to keep Caylee safe. In no universe, on no planet are kidnapped children SAFE. The wheedling and cajoling of Casey, the trying to make her feel like they were 'on her side' was ABSOLUTELY infuriating to me. Perhaps, they acted that way on the advice of a psychologist who told them that was their only chance of getting info from a personality-disordered KC, but that didn't work better than Rick's approach to Cindy and it was such crudola, such a denial of reality. Perhaps when Cindy told Rick he didn't know everything, that's what she meant, that they were going along with KC to try to get info from KC. Yet, the Ants seemed to have veered into the vortex of KC's insanity. Maybe they created it through their family in the 1st place. Who knows, but it would appear that they got sucked into the madness themselves, whether they intended to or not. Rick and Shirley didn't.

But I like that Rick tried with Cindy. I think many of us have wished someone would. I can see George having tried with Cindy too...and gotten pretty much the same response Rick got, words to the effect of 'If you ever say Caylee is dead, I'll never forgive you.' Unlike Rick, wanting to believe Caylee alive for his own purposes, needing to both 'take care' of Cindy and stay in her good graces, I think George capitulated even though I also think he has probably always understood the truth from Day 31. Living this lie has not helped the Ants, nor KC. The Ants have stayed in torturous limbo and any chance of any meaningful life after this is resolved may have been diminished. It seems like they've pretty much driven themselves insane. The longer it went with KC, the longer it goes still, the greater chance KC has of doing close to life jail time and, frankly, time in God's displeasure in the afterlife if she isn't helped to face up and atone. I think Ric was trying to tell them that too, not so much about the afterlife, but about KC's possibilites for life in prison, if the Ants didn't start dealing with her on the up and up. I think he was exaperated but I think he spoke out of concern.

 

[marlap]

Rick was abusive in my opinion. Calling Cindy names when her beloved Caylee was missing and likely dead is waaaaay below the belt.

As far as helping her with tough love? Calling someone stupid and an idiot during a period of extreme loss and panic is not exactly the best method to get someone to listen to reason.

All that does is make the person want to do anything BUT listen to you.

I do understand that people are happy that Rick is telling it like it is (in his way). But his methods are zero percent helpful.

To me, he is unbelievably mean. Cindy didn't hurt Caylee, KC did. Cindy LOVED Caylee.

 

[Feistyoldbroad]

Rick was abusive in my opinion. Calling Cindy names when her beloved Caylee was missing and likely dead is waaaaay below the belt.

As far as helping her with tough love? Calling someone stupid and an idiot during a period of extreme loss and panic is not exactly the best method to get someone to listen to reason.

All that does is make the person want to do anything BUT listen to you.

I do understand that people are happy that Rick is telling it like it is (in his way). But his methods are zero percent helpful.

To me, he is unbelievably mean. Cindy didn't hurt Caylee, KC did. Cindy LOVED Caylee.

If she loved her so much, why did she Lie for Casey? I disagree. Cindy did hurt Caylee. The day she started to lie for KC. and before all the Anthony lovers start sending me more nasty PM, let me just say that I DO KNOW what I would do if I were in their shoes. I would drive Caseys Skanky arse to the police station and DEMAND she tells the truth. She would not come in my home again until she did. Cindy let Caylee down the day the smell went from a dead body to pizza. I am waiting to see if they lock her up after the funeral. I suppose her wanting immunity for LYING isn't such a big deal, huh?

 

[pirate]

If she loved her so much, why did she Lie for Casey? I disagree. Cindy did hurt Caylee. The day she started to lie for KC. and before all the Anthony lovers start sending me more nasty PM, let me just say that I DO KNOW what I would do if I were in their shoes. I would drive Caseys Skanky arse to the police station and DEMAND she tells the truth. She would not come in my home again until she did. Cindy let Caylee down the day the smell went from a dead body to pizza. I am waiting to see if they lock her up after the funeral. I suppose her wanting immunity for LYING isn't such a big deal, huh?

I agree 100%. And I do hope that Cindy ends up facing charges for her changes of story and lies throughout the last several months.

She is a sick, sick woman and I want to see her pay for her actions.

Had she held her ground and demanded the truth from Casey, prior to Caylee's death, maybe that sweet little girl would still be alive today.

 

[marlap]

If she loved her so much, why did she Lie for Casey? I disagree. Cindy did hurt Caylee. The day she started to lie for KC. and before all the Anthony lovers start sending me more nasty PM, let me just say that I DO KNOW what I would do if I were in their shoes. I would drive Caseys Skanky arse to the police station and DEMAND she tells the truth. She would not come in my home again until she did. Cindy let Caylee down the day the smell went from a dead body to pizza. I am waiting to see if they lock her up after the funeral. I suppose her wanting immunity for LYING isn't such a big deal, huh?

To me, Cindy was panicking. I'm not defending that at all though. She definitely should not have lied.

But I stand by my opinion that her brother's e-mails were cruel and not the least bit helpful.

I also stand by my opinion that Cindy did nothing to hurt Caylee. KC is the one who hurt Caylee.

I just wanted to answer your question. I think most people would have turned her in, as Mark Hacking's family did. But not everyone has that kind of courage and I really think Cundy was holding on to any possible hope the Caylee was still alive...even if that meant going along with KC's story.

I agree 100%. And I do hope that Cindy ends up facing charges for her changes of story and lies throughout the last several months.

She is a sick, sick woman and I want to see her pay for her actions.

Had she held her ground and demanded the truth from Casey, prior to Caylee's death, maybe that sweet little girl would still be alive today.

No, Caylee was dead before Cindy even realized they were gone (as in not returning).

I admire the passion of those of you who feel differently than I do, I just disagree.

 

[pirate]

No, Caylee was dead before Cindy even realized they were gone (as in not returning).

I admire the passion of those of you who feel differently than I do, I just disagree.

What I meant by my comment was that there were obviously signs that Casey had problems before June of 2008. Stealing money, claiming to work but not working- and not just for a few months, but for TWO YEARS! Her claims that JG was the father.

So many signs- enough that Cindy sought help from a professional mental health counselor. Given Casey's obvious instability, she waited too long to confront it.

 

[KeysBreeze]

Regardless of the circumstances, calling someone an idiot and stupid (repetitively) is abuse. You may not care because it's Cindy on the receiving end (and we'd all have liked to say it at one time or another) but it is still abuse. I think Cindy reacted to Rick's emails pretty calmly given the circumstances - she could have reacted in the same way each time, but she didn't.
Cindy didn't destroy herself or her family though. Did she delude herself? 'Absolutely'. Casey destroyed that family.

I don't think it's abuse. It's called tough love. Something that should have been done with Casey many years ago.

 

[jandkmom]

While I do think that Rick's e-mails where inappropriate, I do agree with most of their content. It didn't sound to me like he was speaking as a loving brother, more as an angry bystander.

I feel like CA and GA do have some responsibility towards what happened to Caylee, unlike some othere posters. They repeatedly let KC do things that were inappropriate for Caylee. They knew there was no job and no nanny. They had no contact information for the "nanny". They knew there were lots of young men in her life and didn't know what kind of contact they were having with her. Although they provided all of the physical things that a baby would need, we have no idea what they were providing emotionally for Caylee. All we know is what they said after she went missing, but no one has come forward to say that they were loving grandparents that did everything they could to protect Caylee from what happened to her. Either they knew what KC was doing all along or they blindly looked away. If they knew what was happening, then they chose to keep KC happy over Caylee. If they were blindly looking away, then they were also ignoring Caylee's best interests. MOO